Jessica Simpson’s breasts are part of a balanced breakfast

October 4th, 2007 // 173 Comments
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Talk about a breath of fresh air. Let’s just take a break from Britney and take in the magnificent cleavage of Jessica Simpson. Those things kind of make everything go away, don’t they? I feel rejuvenated already. What’s that? Her face isn’t looking so great? Okay, I don’t want to be rude, but, if you were looking at Jessica Simpson’s face, this might not be the site for you. You’ve completely missed the artistic statement I’m trying to make here, and that is this: Gigantic boobs are the most awesome and important thing in the world. Did I copy that from the Bible? No, but don’t feel bad, I get that a lot.

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Comments (173)

  1. Ed | October 4, 2007 at 12:17 pm

    Looks like she spends a lot of time on her knees. I know this perv can think of some really great reasons to have her on her knees.

    Reply
  2. Watter Bottle | October 4, 2007 at 12:17 pm

    Someone raked over her face with a cheese grater

    Reply
  3. Britney Crotch Juice | October 4, 2007 at 12:20 pm

    looks like she’s on a hunt for someone to have sloppy seconds!

    Reply
  4. unfoofoo | October 4, 2007 at 12:20 pm

    WTF? She literally looks like she’s 45! Too much tanning!

    Reply
  5. Oops, i crapped my pants! | October 4, 2007 at 12:21 pm

    She would be a great prostitute.

    Reply
  6. evilqueen | October 4, 2007 at 12:21 pm

    i don’t see there’s anything wrong with her… infact i think she is the MOST natural beauty beside Beyonce

    Reply
  7. gerard Vandenberg | October 4, 2007 at 12:21 pm

    The only part I like about you, although I do not know how bald and wet your Pussie is, are those lovely BIG TITS of yours. JESUS CHRIST JESS!!

    Reply
  8. haroof | October 4, 2007 at 12:22 pm

    You paying attention, Britney?

    Reply
  9. JagedNS | October 4, 2007 at 12:24 pm

    hehehe she really has the “deer caught in the headlights” look about her doesn’t she?

    The lights are on but……………

    Reply
  10. veggi needs a fucking drink | October 4, 2007 at 12:25 pm

    who spells pussy with an ie?

    I kinda like jess. she’s funny without knowing it.

    Reply
  11. BunnyButt | October 4, 2007 at 12:26 pm

    Nice rug burns on her knees …

    Reply
  12. Spaced and thrusting | October 4, 2007 at 12:30 pm

    In pic 5 she looks particularly spacey(hypnotized) and like she’s thrusting her tits at the woman in front of her, “Here they are master, here they are master . . .”

    Reply
  13. Doofus | October 4, 2007 at 12:37 pm

    “Gigantic boobs are the most awesome and important thing in the world.”

    Love that quote. I’m going to say it to one of my flat-chested bosses at work today. I’m sure she’ll appreciate the honesty!

    Reply
  14. Donkey Ass | October 4, 2007 at 12:40 pm

    So much boobie so little brains

    Reply
  15. leatherdaddy | October 4, 2007 at 12:43 pm

    fish call this what it is, a filler. have a drink & let the magic flow.

    Reply
  16. hmmmm | October 4, 2007 at 12:44 pm

    #6, you are kind of random. maybe should open a sears catalogue… i see better looking women all the time in that

    and as for the quote
    “Gigantic boobs are the most awesome and important thing in the world.”

    i disagree. sherri shepards are gigantic, but i would still rather do a pretty thin girl with a flat chest.

    Reply
  17. 15piecesofflare | October 4, 2007 at 12:44 pm

    She just needs to marry a football player and get it over with.

    Reply
  18. stickykeys | October 4, 2007 at 12:45 pm

    fuck, she looks as dumb as a box of rocks. i bet when she thinks real hard, a soft queef-like sound comes out of her ears.

    Reply
  19. i see number 16 | October 4, 2007 at 12:45 pm

    so you are saying the lunch lady at my school is NOT superior to jessica alba??
    despite the fact that her boobs are bigger???

    Reply
  20. PunkA | October 4, 2007 at 12:48 pm

    I bet she gets tagged more often than the slow kid on the payground.

    Reply
  21. JESSICA SIMPSON, SHESSICA SHIMPSON | October 4, 2007 at 12:50 pm

    WHATEVER! my mom has bigger boobs than this broad…. thus mom is clearly more important and attractive….. as boobs being big is most the important thing in judging women.

    Reply
  22. Barry LeFarge | October 4, 2007 at 12:51 pm

    A+ titties

    Reply
  23. * MISS UNIVERSE | October 4, 2007 at 12:53 pm

    She really has a well balanced figure.

    The photo and lighting is bad – it is night – that is why her face does not look its best

    Reply
  24. yes, booobs are number one | October 4, 2007 at 12:54 pm

    muscularity is also good. two muscular beauties : serena williams and jessica biel.
    WINNER : serena williams
    WHY? her boobs are bigger!! plain in simple….. that is most important,
    all that counts.

    Reply
  25. sportsdvl | October 4, 2007 at 12:56 pm

    Her gigantic tits are where her “stupid juice” is kept to fuel that tiny brain of hers.

    Reply
  26. BOOBS IMPORTANT | October 4, 2007 at 12:59 pm

    i saw a homeless woman today with boobs to her knees! way hotter than this chick… the homeless woman smelled like piss and garbage, but clearly better than anything in hollywood… due to her large breasts ( all that counts, most important)

    Reply
  27. No Fan of Jessica | October 4, 2007 at 1:02 pm

    Jessica’s knees are red from begging John Mayer to come back to her. She must have seen the recent picture of John Mayer and his new lover at the Dave Matthews concert at the Hollywood Bowl. And Nick and Vanessa are cozy and happy. The jokes on Jessica ha!

    Reply
  28. boobs, meh | October 4, 2007 at 1:02 pm

    they are nice, but i see what you are getting at ( 21, 26 )

    Reply
  29. Jamie | October 4, 2007 at 1:03 pm

    Since Jessica lost weight; her boobs shrunk, so now she is wearing a padded push up bra ha! She does not have her usually deep cleavage because of weight loss.

    Reply
  30. Classy not Trashy | October 4, 2007 at 1:06 pm

    Jessica looks like a Las Vegas hooker with her breasts and bra exposed like that. She should have wore a little top underneath to make her look classy and not trashy.

    Reply
  31. NOT a DD | October 4, 2007 at 1:07 pm

    this is NOT a 36 DD like she claims…… this is a clear 34 D.
    and so what, most women have boobs. a lot of women who are ugly and fat and weird looking have bigger boobs than this, it doesn’t make them hot. boobs aren’t the most awesome or important. sorry.

    big ones are hot on hot women… but not too big where they hang too low, too many stretch marks, or are soo big they take away from a woman’s shape.

    Reply
  32. Terri | October 4, 2007 at 1:08 pm

    I like the dress because it is great for going on vacation and covering up the tummy bulge from vacation over eating, but I would wear a little strappy top underneath so I look sexy but not whorish.

    Reply
  33. yerstupid | October 4, 2007 at 1:09 pm

    31- how the fuck is it sooooooooooo clear to you what her bra size is? idiot.

    Reply
  34. Samantha | October 4, 2007 at 1:11 pm

    #31
    She lost weight and looks like a 34B because she does not have much cleavage; even with a padded push up bra.

    Reply
  35. FRIST!!! | October 4, 2007 at 1:12 pm

    This is boring. If I wanted to look at boobies I’d look in a mirror or something. It’d have to be a pretty big mirror, though, cause my boobies are like HUGE!!!!

    Hey veggi, there’s some brandy up in the cupboard in the coffee brak room. I can hook you up.

    Reply
  36. Mandy | October 4, 2007 at 1:12 pm

    #33,
    if you have been in a long term relationship where you bought lingerie for your gf, or are a woman, i think you could tell her bra size.
    she is a small girl, so she is likely 34 inches around and not 36.
    im a 34 c and boobs dont look that much smaller
    a DD is VERY large. hers are not.
    this is like if you saw a fat person, you would say that are a siz 22 not a 4… etc.
    not rocket science.

    Reply
  37. Nathan | October 4, 2007 at 1:13 pm

    The best part of wakin’ up!

    Reply
  38. We Women Know Bra Sizes | October 4, 2007 at 1:14 pm

    #32
    My breast size go up and down like Jessica when gaining and losing weight. Us women know about bra sizes. She looks like a 34B right now. I do not know bra sizes once they get into the double letter like DD, but usually porn stars and strippers wear the double letter bras. Like someone posted earlier, Jessica was never a DD, but more like a full C or D cup.

    Reply
  39. maybe she is.... | October 4, 2007 at 1:15 pm

    i think they look more full than 34 B. MAYBE should could wear a full cover 34C, but in a demi 34C she would likely have the double bubble.
    her frame is very small though, maybe a 32 D??

    Reply
  40. George | October 4, 2007 at 1:16 pm

    Boobs-a-lot = Jock-a-lot

    Reply
  41. I agree #31 | October 4, 2007 at 1:17 pm

    you make a valid point. #26, i also saw a homeless woman today with bigger boobs. i guess thats what you get for living in the city.

    Reply
  42. Yazoo | October 4, 2007 at 1:18 pm

    She’s so prittay, oh so prittay….(boom, boom, boom, boom) VACANT!!!!!

    Reply
  43. my comment | October 4, 2007 at 1:19 pm

    All boobs aside, WTF is that woman behind her wearing?

    A thigh-length cowl neck sweat schmatta, UNDER a blazer? With leggings?

    Who dresses these people in LA? Ringling Bros. Circus?

    Reply
  44. Oops, i crapped my pants! | October 4, 2007 at 1:19 pm

    Ladies, Ladies!! Why are writing about bras when we could be writing about boobs? Now lets focus on what truly import here…Boobs. Now I like boobs because I can’t think of anything wrong with them. Discuss.

    Reply
  45. Josh | October 4, 2007 at 1:19 pm

    “a lot of women who are ugly and fat and weird looking have bigger boobs than this, it doesn’t make them hot. boobs aren’t the most awesome or important. sorry.

    big ones are hot on hot women… but not too big where they hang too low, too many stretch marks, or are soo big they take away from a woman’s shape.”

    you are right.

    Reply
  46. Jimbo | October 4, 2007 at 1:24 pm

    You must look directly into her tits if you want to communicate with her.

    Reply
  47. my comment | October 4, 2007 at 1:24 pm

    No way in hell she’s a 34B.

    She’s at least a D. Absolutely bigger than a C.

    Reply
  48. hey #16 | October 4, 2007 at 1:24 pm

    i just looked up a picture of sherri sheperd, her boobs are bigger than jessica’s. i guess that means she is the hotter of the two to the Fish.

    Reply
  49. Jus' Stupid | October 4, 2007 at 1:25 pm

    Boobs are just great toys. Fun for the whole family.

    Reply
  50. #47 | October 4, 2007 at 1:26 pm

    she is a small D, but I agree a D. a 32 or 34 D ( cause she is thin and petite ).

    Reply

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