Jessica Simpson to replace Paula on Idol?

August 17th, 2009 // 35 Comments

Because there’s nothing America loves more than a sloppy drunk judging its potential pop superstars, Page Six reports Jessica Simpson is being floated as a candidate to replace Paula Abdul on American Idol. I can actually see this working out.

PRODUCER: Alright, Jessica, here’s what I want you to do: Any time you see a contestant doing something you’d personally do yourself, kick them off the show.
JESSICA: I like chicken.
PRODUCER: ….

Okay, maybe not.

Photo: Flynet
superficial

  1. Taz

    she is still hot enough to bone

  2. Sara

    Great going from one ditz to the next.

  3. Taz

    id pump her big tits all night

  4. Pol

    Swap one brain dead, drug-adled has been for another brain dead, drug-adled has been.

    Makes sense.

  5. Tim

    Huge Man Chin. Huge Turkey Flaps under her Arms. Huge Cans = A Cooter the size of the Lincoln Tunnel.

  6. Kelley

    Nonsense !! She doesn’t have the brains God gave a gopher …

  7. I’d prefer Katy Perry or Victoria Beckham be more permanent than just guest judges but Jessica Simpson? Yeah, she’d be one hell of a trainwreck – and that’s good TV!

  8. stupidass

    wait, i thought vic beckham was the replacement. just a rumor, huh?

  9. Joe Blow

    I don’t care who they put in there. Stupid fucking Paula Abdul is GONE baby!!!!

    Now I won’t have to mute the TV to not have to listen to her unbelievably stupid comments anymore!!!

  10. PunkA

    American Porn Star. Now that is a show I’d watch to see who won and gave it their all, ya know. Imagine how awesome that competition would be. And the theme weeks would be sweet. First Time on Camera Week. Anal Week. Pop Shot Week. Double Dick Week. Girl on Girl Week. Interracial Week. Prop Week. I mean, it has potential.

  11. nyc gal

    @ Tim number 5: nah not her cooter. she likes it up the a@@.

  12. Name No

    This is the best replacement person yet. Please don’t be a rumor! Pappa Joeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

  13. Richard McBeef

    @10 – by double dick do you mean chinese fingertrap or DP?

    What about ATM?

  14. TonyRomo

    Maybe jessica will fart for simon they way she used to fart for me. And they won’t be farts that smell like rosehips and jasmine. They’ll be foul farts like you get after eating beef ribs. Why her farts smelled so bad they would make a guy leave the house happy to get sacked by angry linebackers while throwing passes.

  15. VtFarmboy

    Wow, think of it what a concept. A person with no talent(other than physical talent)l judgeing other people with no talent. What a concept god i love reality tv…

  16. Aerialgreen

    When you are supposedly a singer/entertainer, Isn’t being a judge in American Idol pretty much telling everyone that you are done, paid your dues and actually have some insight on once being a A+ celebrity….and that ain’t Jessica Simpson.

    Doing reality shows take all the credibility you have, quick cashing on playing “Americas’ stupid sweetheart” will always follow until you die, and staying fresh by whoring yourself to gossip is pretty much the final nail in the coffin on the career of any has-been pop-singer.

  17. Whos leaking this Pappy Joe? Thatll get me to watch again…I think shes charming…

  18. Anonymous

    “Now I won’t have to mute the TV to not have to listen to her unbelievably stupid comments anymore!!!”

    Do what I do…….don’t watch the useless fucking show!!

  19. Galtacticus

    Is there somewhere a national holiday or somethin’? The servers are busy like shit.

  20. Darth

    They must be really desperate for a judge!

  21. Nero

    And it’s That easy to become a celebitchy.You don’t even have to be really talented!?

  22. Gando

    @21
    It’s almost Too easy!

  23. Rhialto

    @21

    In many cases,it’s more essential to be a tough and hardened business woman!

  24. Galtacticus

    #21-23

    Just take it easy and don’t reveal too much how easy it is. . . We’ve a lot of knowledge about this.

  25. Jessica Simpson to replace Paula on Idol? wait, i thought vic beckham was the replacement. just a rumor, huh?

  26. If Jessica Simpson goes on idol, they lost me as a viewer. She is sooooooooooo boring. I’d rather put in an old vcr of Mr Rogers than watch her and Kara. It’s bad enought that they put no personality Kara on and to add a ditzy untalented blonde on will ad insult to injury.
    I think she better give up modeling. these pictures were horrible. Anyone knows you don’t put frills and gathers and pleats on a chubby lady. Her behind stuck out like a bubble and her front stuck out like a maternity dress,
    but I’ll give her credit, for bravery for putting on that tight ugly dress. It and the hai rdo makes her look 40ish. If she is going to let her boobs sag like that, she needs to put on a bra or get a boob job. In my opinion, she is a has been that really never was.

  27. If Jessica Simpson goes on idol, they lost me as a viewer. She is sooooooooooo boring. I’d rather put in an old vcr of Mr Rogers than watch her and Kara. It’s bad enought that they put no personality Kara on and to add a ditzy untalented blonde on will ad insult to injury.
    I think she better give up modeling. these pictures were horrible. Anyone knows you don’t put frills and gathers and pleats on a chubby lady. Her behind stuck out like a bubble and her front stuck out like a maternity dress,
    but I’ll give her credit, for bravery for putting on that tight ugly dress. It and the hai rdo makes her look 40ish. If she is going to let her boobs sag like that, she needs to put on a bra or get a boob job. In my opinion, she is a has been that really never was.

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    It’s quite interesting.I will look around for more such post.Thanks for sharing.

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  31. American Porn Star. Now that I have a show to see who won and gave it my all, want to watch ya know. Imagine how awesome would contest. And theme weeks will be sweet. Week for the first time on camera. Anal week. Pop Shot Week. Double Dick week. Girl on Girl weeks. Interracial week. Tech Week. I mean, it has potential.

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