Jessica Simpson still wearing her wedding ring

April 20th, 2006 // 96 Comments

Jessica Simpson is back to wearing her wedding ring on a chain around her neck again. Also on the chain are two crosses; one her parents gave her and another that’s identical to the ones worn by both her sister and mother. A source tells People magazine:

“You can still move on and have the memories. Nick will always be an important part of her life. [The jewelry pieces represent] a combination of things that are important to her.”

She’s been wearing her ring around her neck since last November so it’s strange the media suddenly cares again. Maybe next they’ll revive the rumors that Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise are dating. Ooh, I totally think they are.



  1. CHUD

    if the jewelry represents things that are important to her she should also have a golden miniature of her father’s penis.

  2. gsprescueguy

    I just hope those two special kids get back together!



  3. LookAtME

    I wear a piece of something from all my victims, I mean boyfriends, of the past. Of course I have arthritis of the neck from all my bling-bling. Just like Boyle! I love being a slut.

  4. Steph

    her lips just keep getting bigger and bigger….

  5. ImCurly

    If she had a brain upstairs and was able to think for herself, she’d fire her father, take all her money and grab Nick only to run, run, run somewhere far, so they’d have a decent change at living, “Happily Ever After” … her father is too controlling and has too much to say, Ashley and Jessica are his puppets.

  6. Land-Man

    Now she is a hottie. This is what all you fatties should be striving for. Remember, Land-Man’s anaconda don’t want none if you’re a fat damn pig.

  7. spatz

    #1 very funny. you should be first all the time so that these douches can stop saying “first” everytime they are first.


  8. ImCurly

    And, I wouldn’t be surprised if she cried herself to sleep eachnight, hating her life- not belonging to “Her” … she’ll have a nervous breakdown soon and disappear while Miriah did for a while …

  9. Otto

    Something tells me that your neck arthritis isn’t from bling-bling…And for the record, when a guy takes you out to his car so you can blow him and then never calls you again, he’s not your boyfriend….possibly the victim of a bad hummer, but not your boyfriend.

    PS. I want my pineapple air freshener and my Styx tape back.

  10. BigJim

    How many collogens had to die so she could have those lips?

  11. PapaHotNuts

    Next time I see her, the only jewelry she will be wearing is a pearl necklace.

  12. Land-Man

    And I’ll ejaculate on her.

  13. minime

    #1 is just a sicko. Yet I Guess Jessica’s father is too. If anything should be on the chain it’s a can of tuna. Ha Ha Ha?

  14. Baroness

    But… this picture is nearly two months old. It’s been on the net forever – it’s hardly recent.

  15. M@ce

    I wear Suri’s placenta as a chain around my neck. It’s important to me…and to the swarm of flies.

  16. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    Also on the necklace:
    1 half of a broken heart with the letters “BFF”
    A shell she found in a potted plant at the dentist’s office
    A Dora the Explorer toy she found in her box of Captain Crunch
    A locket with a picture of dad’s scrotum

  17. Jacq

    Katie Holmes would have a hard time getting a ring on her neck. I heard Tom bought a size four and he neck is definitely a six. If she’s wearing things that are important to her, that goes a long way to explaining the dollar bill stapled on her ass (which her dad also dreams of wearing as a hat).

    #1 – I love the golden dad penis, it’s my favorite Monopoly piece.

    LandMan, we get it. No one wants you either. I thought it was an unspoken thing, but you made me say it. Oh and since I know you’re probably inexperienced when it comes to sex, but if you look at the post above yours at #12, that’s already been done.

  18. mamacita

    That locket also contains one of dad’s pubes and a tiny schmear of dad’s smegma. Mmmmm smegma. Who wants a bagel?

  19. krisdylee

    could someone ring her neck then? ha.

  20. JP

    No no no no. They got this story all wrong. She is not wearing her wedding ring, she is wearing a COCK ring around her neck. The same one that Johnny Knoxville used when he was pummeling that thang for 4 hours straight.

  21. krisdylee

    do me next papa. i loooovvveee pearl necklaces. in fact, i wore one last night, just washed it off this morning.

  22. M@ce

    I wonder if MeganHarris would give me her Hello Kitty labia ring to wear on a chain around my neck?

  23. i understand jessica also still wears nick’s ballz around her neck…you just can’t see them in that pic…gherkin…

  24. LookAtME

    #9.. sorry Otto. I forgot to take my dentures out with you. I’ll drop your stuff off behind the dumpster in the Hooters parking lot, where I blew you.

  25. gogoboots

    Jessica’s retarded, need I say more?

  26. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    I like my bagels toasted with smegma and labia. It’s a Kabballah tradition. SOM.

  27. Land-Man

    Why don’t you leave Jacq? Land-Man is the toast of these boards. You unfunny fuck, my last post was intentional retard.

  28. mamacita


    “need I say more?”


  29. A Nobody

    Man, who can possibly focus on the rings when there are disgustingly huge juicy….

    Lips in that photo? The girl needs to back off with the botox, the balloon lips makes her look like a woman who slept in a beehive.

  30. mamacita


    Fool, please. Jacq’s funny, you’re not. It’s a simple equation, really.

    See, where a-b=c

    The Superficial – LandMan= Way funnier.

  31. That isn’t a ring. It’s a battery incase she shuts down during a press photo they can quickly have a spare on had to start her up again.

  32. M@ce

    I’m glad to see that Land-Man is “intentionally retarded”. I would hate to think that he didn’t have a choice in the matter. Some choose retardation, others have it thrust upon them. Good choice Land-Man, stupidity suits you.

  33. Land-Man

    That was hilarious mamacita, that equation thing. HAHA you dumb cunt. Fuck you.

  34. sadiembeagle

    Anyone think this “separation and divorce” is yet another publicity stunt for their crappy show? “Newlyweds II – Back and Better Than Ever!!!!1one”

  35. mamacita


    Wow, you’re really on a roll today. This is the most unoriginal you’ve ever been. I think I liked you better when you were maligning my home town of Crapville.

    P.S. I may be a dumb cunt, but you’re a thunder cunt.

  36. ThatsHot

    I really wish she’d go away. Far, far away. Preferably off a cliff, down a deep jagged chasam. I mean, what the hell do we need to keep her sullen, brooding, fish-lipped ass around for anyway. Svengali-Joe has got a Jess clone all lined up. Check it out (it’s the 1st pic with the pink background):

  37. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    34 – Wait for it. Either that or a new shocking relationship with Justin Timblerlake, Brooke Burke, Johnny Knoxville, or Pink – for either. Wouldn’t it be great if Pink and Jessica hooked up? I should work in PR…

  38. smokin

    that bitch is wearing my sunglasses…

  39. Jacq

    #27 – “Toast of these boards”?!?!?! Bwha-ha-ha! You’re toast alright. We’ve got our sights set on you.

  40. You think wearing Nick’s wedding ring around her neck is tacky? She turned his cock ring into a brooch.

  41. Princess Di's Ghost

    What’s a thunder cunt? Is that supposed to be offensive? Christ…

  42. mamacita


    What? Are you and Land-Man like, BFF or something? And yes, thunder cunt is supposed to be offensive, yet funny (kind of like a cabbage fart). I’m sorry I didn’t reach the level of offensiveness that you did in this little gem from the Kelly Clarkson thread :

    “There’s nothing wrong with being from Britain. It’s not the greatest place in the world but hey, at least I’m not black.”

    but maybe after a few years of suckling at your racist teat, I can learn.

  43. mamacita


    P.S. Don’t say this “Christ…”. Jesus doesn’t like bigoted assholes.

  44. brewdick

    for those of you who wanted a tom shirt…

  45. First of all, that’s not even Nick’s wedding ring. That’s the promise ring he gave me before we got married. The media gets things all wrong. whoops!

  46. Do you guys get the idea that her dad tried to fuck all her friends while she was growing up? “Not Ashley’s friends, they were the ugly goth kids because Ashley is very punk and edgy”

  47. PapaHotNuts

    MeganHarris is obviously someone either working for the Superficial or purposely posting this crap. I just can’t concieve that a person could actually be this stupid. If you are pretending to suffer from Down’s Syndrome, you are doing a great job.
    But if you are really this stupid, then we can all quit having faith in God because no God of mine would have created a human this fucking ignorant.

  48. Land-Man

    Don’t listen to mamacita, Princess Di’s Ghost. Nobody likes her and she posts unfunny shit all the time. Land-Man’s got your back budy.

  49. CHUD


    I like to make the golden dad penis monopoly piece poke the golden tuna can piece. Free Parking.

  50. Geno

    That’s just strange, bizarre & hurtful.

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