Seen here over the years/when she was retarded hot, Jessica Simpson appears in the latest issue of Allure where she might as well have answered each question with “I’m completely oblivious to everything around me and sometimes a man’s penis enters my vagina.” Or at least that’s how I read it:
On her weight:
“When I walk through an airport and people go, ‘You’re not fat!’ I’m like, ‘Thanks. Thanks. That’s great. Good to know I’m not fat today. Thank you!’ “My job is to be creative. And I’m not weighing in for anybody.”
On how she’ll date pretty much anybody:
“I definitely will marry an artistic man. It will show you the colors of my character, the person that I fall in love with next. I don’t even have a type! I don’t have a physical type. I have an emotional type. When you have yourself together, I don’t care what you look like at all. You can be tall; you can be short.”
On doing nudity:
“I don’t care how dark and intellectual the role could be, you know? I don’t care if I frickin’ get an Oscar for it, I’m not going to do it. Those accolades mean nothing to me….I don’t think people deserve to see what’s underneath my clothing. That’s only for my next husband–ha ha ha!”
On being herself:
“I don’t care if the cameras are on or not, you’re going to get the real me. There’s no reason to mask that, because that’s what has given me the chance to be in a powerful position.”
And that powerful position includes the ability to fart at will during business meetings. It’s amazing she’s not president.
arealcad | February 16, 2010 at 1:57 pm
I’d hit it. Tape it. Then, spank it while watching the reruns.
TheJoker | February 16, 2010 at 2:00 pm
This is why I love that woman. She can fart around me anytime. I’m artistic. Do you hear this JS?!
Parker | February 16, 2010 at 2:01 pm
That’d be funny if she farted while I was buttfucking her. I wouldn’t stop, I’d just be like, Jessica! You animal, you. Hold it in till I finish, will ya? Geez.
billyboy | February 16, 2010 at 2:02 pm
MMM . I got warm sensation all over, eh he he!
Anon | February 16, 2010 at 2:27 pm
She is so hot I’m just upset she wont do nudity.
She has a better figure than 90% of women who do.
Ego | February 16, 2010 at 2:31 pm
I miss the days when she was “retarded hot”
*sigh”
I’d still beat that puss like a rented mule. just sayin
sushi | February 16, 2010 at 2:35 pm
I did laugh that she said she’d date anyone, short, tall but she failed to mention fat.
She looks great though at her current weight. Hopefully she’ll reconsider showing her great jugs.
McFeely Smackup | February 16, 2010 at 2:38 pm
Ever notice you never hear a fit woman say “america is obsessed with weight”?
Jessica, the reason people call you fat, is you are FAT. The reason people care that you’re fat is because your JOB is to be attractive and you’re failing at it.
Laura | February 16, 2010 at 2:43 pm
Won’t do nudity? She’s most of the way there in the top pic!
Laura | February 16, 2010 at 2:44 pm
Won’t do nudity? She’s most of the way there in the top pic!
Janice Anderson | February 16, 2010 at 2:44 pm
Fat? aw that is a sad saddd comment, her body is pretty perfect..nowhere near fat
whatever | February 16, 2010 at 2:51 pm
Did Papa Joe orchestrate those poses?
McFeely Smackup | February 16, 2010 at 2:58 pm
” 11. Janice Anderson – February 16, 2010 2:44 PM
Fat? aw that is a sad saddd comment, her body is pretty perfect..nowhere near fat
”
Janice doesn’t understand that photos are not a magic window looking at a person. Someone might be able to explain to her that these pics are 6 years old and today she is about 40 lbs heavier.
Anon | February 16, 2010 at 3:06 pm
She’s not fat. Not by a long shot.
Not by American standards.
At best a little plump. Which she pulls of Beautifully.
Oh | February 16, 2010 at 3:06 pm
shopping cart
Richport's Ghost | February 16, 2010 at 3:15 pm
Sure, she’ll do 3-ways & anal, but she’ll save her body for her next husband…
And the check’s in the mail, and I won’t come in your mouth…
oooaaahhh | February 16, 2010 at 3:46 pm
Who did her makeup, Watson & Standard?
KIKI | February 16, 2010 at 4:05 pm
I am impressed with these pics, they are current in W mag.
They are also photoshopped to hell and back, but she looks great. Dumb blonds are ok when they are humble.
Diane | February 16, 2010 at 4:25 pm
These are photos from her 2006 Allure article. Not sure how photo shopped they were because she was looking pretty darn good back then. The ones for the 2010 are on her website. You can tell that even the outtake photos have been altered because her legs are not that thin in real life.
KIKI | February 16, 2010 at 4:38 pm
I stand corrected.
Toma | February 16, 2010 at 5:00 pm
If I was her next husband and I saw these photos, I’d cry in the corner like a bitch while Nick Lachey pointed and laughed at me.
chuck | February 16, 2010 at 5:18 pm
I liked her better when she was skinny, but she still is way hot plus most of the pictures of her lately she isn’t wearing a ton of makeup makes her even hotter
I know this is an old picture but | February 16, 2010 at 6:03 pm
even now she is only half the size of one of Christina Hendrick’s tits. Christina Hendricks is a whale of a woman.
truth doctor | February 16, 2010 at 8:40 pm
Jessica Simpson: Smarter than Megan Fox.
James | February 16, 2010 at 8:50 pm
Jessica, could you please show your boobs at least once? Please?
KELLY | February 16, 2010 at 8:50 pm
These pictures are from when she was slim and hot…. She went DOWNHILL as soon as she left Nick, everyone knows that!
She looks amazing here, but now shes frumpy, boring, chunky…. BLURGH!
justifiable | February 16, 2010 at 9:33 pm
Jessica, no worries over the nudity bit – if it’s in any way a dark and/or intellectual role, there’s no way you’ll be allowed within 50 miles of it. Easy to say those accolades would mean nothing to you, since you’ll never, ever, get them in the first place.
As for anything approaching Oscar-worthy?
In your fevered fat-girl dreams, sweets.
ppl | February 16, 2010 at 9:57 pm
man, beauty is really a short career… what a different a few years make now and then. Too bad Jessica your days of hottess is over
cowbulls | February 16, 2010 at 10:06 pm
I like real, natural women with curves and Jessica is fantastic. Mayer’s comments about her sexuality seem right on to me.
Frowsey McFunky | February 16, 2010 at 10:55 pm
I, like Papa Joe, would love to die happy between those breasts.
JN | February 16, 2010 at 11:12 pm
I’d vote Simpson over Palin.
m3 card | February 16, 2010 at 11:43 pm
These comments arent very nice…i know how to throw a stone when the need be but this is completely out of sort because she looks beautiful on the cover …she has always been a beautiful girl and has a great voice. i hope the right opportunity comes her way very soon.
State the Obvious | February 17, 2010 at 12:03 am
It’s nice to see that even in this economy, dumb whores can still find steady work.
Jeff | February 17, 2010 at 12:42 am
i would take her as president over obama any day
Rod-Man | February 17, 2010 at 1:16 am
Oh Jessica, you don’t have to worry about winning an Oscar. Eventually one of your boyfriends will leak some pics of you anyway so you might as well get paid for it. That’s just my opinion though.
Insatiable Peter | February 17, 2010 at 1:23 am
Why is it the retarded ones who think they’ll always win an Oscar?
6ave coupon code | February 17, 2010 at 3:45 am
Shouldn’t Pimp Daddy Joe at least wait and see how soon her upcoming series on beauty is going to to flop before he begins another loser project. I see where the word “creepy” is used over and over again here to describe him * I totally agree it fits him perfectly. At 29 years old, it might benefit Jessica to tell her dad enough is enough and perhaps hire a REAL manager and perhaps find something that suits her talent, whatever that might be.
Doc Schweinstrudel | February 17, 2010 at 4:16 am
She looks really good in these pictures, beautiful brown
Photoshop Phil | February 17, 2010 at 4:45 am
Are you kidding me? The photoshopped her thighs to be that slim. She’s way chunkier in real life.
terri | February 17, 2010 at 5:36 am
she is soo photoshopped in these pictures.she use to be hot but not theses days shes not.
Tim | February 17, 2010 at 8:28 am
I dissapointed.
that's brigitte bardot | February 17, 2010 at 9:06 am
OK she looks hot in the cover photo, but that’s NOT HER. It’s an old photo, that was photoshopped. Since when did she look like Brigitte Bardot??
Fido | February 17, 2010 at 10:15 am
VERY SEXY FEET!!! Her slightly dirty soles are so erotic!!!
James | February 17, 2010 at 1:35 pm
She’s beautiful. I hate her. Not really, but I’d go straight for Jessica, oh yes. She’s hot.
britt | February 17, 2010 at 1:35 pm
These are old pictures that are being published again. I believe this was from a Japanese magazine called Glitter, some years back. Look it up! What a phoney! Her stomach DEFINITELY ain’t lookn like THAT ever again!!!
Kristin | February 17, 2010 at 2:31 pm
the photoshopper got a lot of overtime on this one.
Brett Croft | February 17, 2010 at 3:27 pm
Damn, she’s still so sexy.. I found a bunch of her pics along with other celebs on this site http://www.swagflavor.com , just click Flavors and choose the category Celebrity.. it made my life a lot easier lol
spicy | February 17, 2010 at 10:03 pm
jess… get real. you look nothing like this. photoshop <33333
#42 is dead on | February 17, 2010 at 10:31 pm
HAHAHAHA #42 is SO RIGHT.
The pic has been photoshopped so much it looks like BRIGITTE BARDOT. Jessica does not and has NEVER looked this good wtf. A little airbrushing is fine for a magazine shoot, but c’mon!
tony romo | February 17, 2010 at 11:16 pm
i would like to fuck her in that position in that wicker chair (pix 1)