Because one man’s trash is another man’s penis holster, Jessica Simpson has reportedly rebounded with John Mayer who had dumped her years ago after he realized she has the sexual proclivity of an English muffin. InTouch reports:
An insider reveals that, in a state of desperation and loneliness, she’s been secretly hooking up with her ex John Mayer, who unceremoniously dumped her in 2007 after they dated for a year. “They’ve always had an amazing connection,” a business associate of Jessica’s tells In Touch. Ignoring her friends’ warnings that the notorious player will just use her and then break up with her again, Jessica has jumped headfirst into a relationship with the singer now that she and Tony, 29, split. “Jessica is kidding herself that her and John stand a chance,” says a source.
It’s sort of tragic being Jessica Simpson considering men only want to be with her for one reason and it’s never to watch Shrek on loop until she figures out how they got the donkey to talk. Why won’t somebody tell her?!
hit that johnny boy
2nd!!
I COULDA BEEN A FIRST-TARD?!?!?!
Missed my chance.
I just heard that Kristen Cavellari is John Meyers booty call. What does that guy have that these women can’t quit?
The gossip shows are teasing a story about Jennifer Anniston and John Mayer back together and shacking up at the Four Seasons in NYC. He must have an album that is about to be released.
I just talked on the phone with Alicia Keys assistant she says her and john were dating
Yes, he sang “Your boobies are a saggyland” to her last night in concert. It got a standing O.
He was spotted with Lindsay Lohan in Target last week.
I heard he picked up Phyllis Diller at the IHOP in Pasedena.
John and I have a really hot sex tape coming out this spring. Ask for it at your favorite store.
Wasn’t there just another report that John Mayer has been doing that Kristin Cavallari chick for the past couple years on the down low?
9. Aww come on! Phyllis Diller? Everyone knows he goes for the natural blondes.
I have to disagree that John is only back with her for one reason. I totally believe he is with her for only TWO reasons…. ( .)(. )
I hope he doesn’t break her wittle heart again. He must be amazing in the ol sack.
“sexual proclivity of an English muffin?”
I guess I get it…
oh wait. nope. no, uh, nu-uh.
John can pull sweet girls in his bed but OMG!!! He is a dirty douche bag, I don’t know how all of these Hollywood girls fail to see that. He has major talents but his fame whoring life style vomits all over his talents. I will remember the girls he date and parade in public more than his music.
How does he have time for all these beautiful women when he is currently twittering the consistancy of his last bowel movement?
Man-cow is looking for any port in her storm. It’s all downhill from here…the girl’s only asset was her looks, and now that she’s porking up and looking like your typical overweight redneck trash, she’s gonna fall hard.
show business – it’s high school with money
@ #4 KIKI
A BIG DICK
@ #4 KIKI
A BIG DICK
@ 4
“I just heard that Kristen Cavellari is John Meyers booty call. What does that guy have that these women can’t quit?”
He makes painfully cheesy love songs. Embarrassing love songs are to women what porn is to men. They eat it up.
@ #20, Hey Holmes, glad to see you are watching us from above. So, do you think John Mayer is going to show us his stuff via a sex tape? A girl can only dream………
@Heath’s “now that she’s porking up and looking like your typical overweight redneck trash”- yeah, totally brahhh. Every fatty at the Krystal looks like her!
show business – it’s high school with money
Desperate times call for desperate measures and
PS #7 – You are a hoot. That is hilarious and thanks for my afternoon laugh.
“says a source” means “my friend said”
You can tell John Mayer has a Cd coming out and Jennifer Aniston is dropping another one of those bomb of a movie. Jen can’t release a movie without a man are her few pathetic fan will not go see her movie.
You can tell John Mayer has a Cd coming out and Jennifer Aniston is dropping another one of those bomb of a movie. Jen can’t release a movie without a man are her few pathetic fan will not go see her movie.
” a business associate of Jessica’s tells In Touch” = Jessicas fucked up father. John Mayer is brilliant. Jessica has worked out and lost the weight she gained while with overthrow-mo. She has low self esteem. dumped & no career. Can you imagine what jessica would be willing to do. Bet after nailing her anally, you could get her to bark like a dog. Then she would pour you a few shots and make dinner while you slept.
Yeah low self esteem girl with jump through loops.
John crushes pussies.
Why do these jackasses never get the booty shot, FACK!!
Back with Mayer – is that desperation, a cry for help, or pure self loathing. Johnny seems to be the guy girls go to when they’ve given up on themselves.
Internet is a quite good place to meet friends and even find
whatever your need. i am
just in the beginning of my career and want to find a rich
man, maybe to be my sugar daddy. so i uploaded my hot
and evennaked photos on ~~~~ Sugarloves.Com ~~~~ under
the name Michelle2000, maybe you want to check out my
photos firstly!
Once you’re a singer, the gates of pussyland are open for business. It doesn’t matter even if you’re as ugly as him.
#15, yeah.
I hate when people misuse words.
started out a relationship again or ‘rebound’.There’s an ocean of differences in between.
It might be good for her ‘singing career’.
Somebody has to watch her butt anyway.And just let it coincidentally be John Mayer?!
My Man Ho
Will hit that HAS BEEN slop….. then quit that HAS BEEN slop….NEXT
She’s a laughing stock.
I think she looks good here. I think she actually looks better in jeans than anything else.
She should get with Eddie Murphy. He’ll teach her about talking donkeys, and then she can turn into the woman from Norbit (not Thandie Newton).
shot him…
Good blog, very good article. I have book mark the site.I will come again.
I think John can do much better. He is a talented musician that can have his pick of women, why settle for Jessica Simpson who is a box of rocks?
have very nice hair …
weryy beautiful..