Jessica Simpson: ‘Must. Never. Stop. Wearing. Cutoffs.’

Brooke again, wtf? Two stories in one day???

…oh…wait…it’s Jessica…

Arrested Development FTW.

Eww…

You show me a naked dinosaur and I’ll show you my O-face.

She’s just being practical. With her thighs adding more thunder every day, she’d have to buy a new pair of jeans every week.

I’d be happy to be her analyst-therapist.

Never nudes are no laughing matter. There are dozens of us!

There are dozens of us! Dozens!

Must be a real privilege to be the assistant who gets to scrub the shorts with Monistat each night.

I’d lick that up down and all around until she shot gravy..then would go back for seconds..thirds..fourths….etc. she’s hot..and I would love to have her press those thighs up against my ears.

I LOVE HER LEGS!!! As long as she doesn’t get cankles, she’ll be hot in my book. I wish I could be gettin’ busy with her!!!

i don’t get it.

ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT!! I normally don’t ever comment but ..

it had to be admired.

well she can’t exactly show off her toned stomach, now can she? at this point, girl is out of options. it’s the legs or the gut–take your pick.

#10, you wouldn’t do shit and you know it. You’re a friggin douchebag. I guarantee you have never tasted pussy in your life.

“until she shot gravy”…WTF?

Straight up douchebag. Congrats.

she could crush a guy’s skull with those thighs.

pic 5, looks like a hardcore singer

I’d love her to choke me out with those thighs :-b

I always thought he just really liked cut offs.

Where’s my legal Sweetie??

She wears cutoffs because she cannot squeeze her fat thighs and ass into anything that covers more than her crotch.

Those are bermuda shorts on anyone else, by the way.

Crisis time is cutoffs time!? It’s good to see that Jessica simpson has a warm heart for the folks!

Thanks for the memories #6. I had completely forgotten about that joke.

Great muscular legs! What’s her 100 meter time!?

She reminds of a sorority girl that put on the mandatory 5-15 pounds over her freshmen winter months, and is now trying to squeeze back into her summer outfits and is realizing just how big she’s gotten, so she starts fucking 2-3 guys a weekend to feel better about herself.

I felt bad for her at first but now all my sympathy is gone, she’s an annoying attention whore, and nobody looks good in clothes that are 3 sizes too small..adding a bigger button-up doesn’t make it look better either, nor does it make her ‘country’

I saw her Friday night with Rascal Flatts in San Diego (“outside LA.” that cracks me up) and she looked damn good! :O) She can wear daisy dukes anytime! She looked hot and the singing wasn’t so bad either….

I saw her Friday night with Rascal Flatts in San Diego (“outside LA.” that cracks me up) and she looked damn good! :O) She can wear daisy dukes anytime! She looked hot and the singing wasn’t so bad either….

I’d still stick her, but . . .
http://img167.imageshack.us/img167/5238/hardcore.jpg

I think the bigger issue here is when she is going to finally reveal that she is pregnant. Or is she gonna let us find out on our own?

She looks pretty good imo. I like the curves.

I NEVER comment but I HAD to give some Arrested Development love! Amazingness!

dugg for arrested development reference

Nein Wohlstandig Nude

hahaha a never nude. That makes things awkward at the Korean spa.

#30 Fati, if you can’t tell a pregnancy bump from all-over weight gain from too much wings, pizza, beer, guacamole, nachos and funnel cake stay the hell out of Acapulco and Papa Ginos. It’ll only be embarassing for you when you try to file a paternity suit against them.

i love this bitch

When you say “outside Los Angeles’ do you mean “strip mall in the desert”?

Marvel should cast her as the new Thor. Or maybe Joe Ruby’s Thundarr the Barbarian. Or not…

Just because she sings country music, doesn’t mean she needs to dress like she just walked out of her double wide trailer for her job at Walmart.

She looks terrible and pathetic. Of course, she’ll have the last laugh when she announces that she and her trapped boyfriend are expecting.

Perhaps something in a lovely MooMoo, Jessica. Now THAT’S what all the really “hot” babes are wearing!

No. Really. I’m telling you the truth. As far as you know.

Love the arrested development reference!

She has creepy short midget legs. Ew!

I love the haters on here. EVERY SINGLE GUY on here would pay for an opportunity to taste her…and more. But thats ok, you fat asses keep sitting there making fun of her while eating your donuts, drinking your latte’s and taking in 4000 calories a day (and countless carbs).

Shes a fucking HOT ASS woman and Id guarantee shes looks better than any of your wives, girlfriends, transvestite lovers or hermaphrodite partners (the last 2 thrown in to cover you west coast flakes).

Jealousy is simply and clearly the fear that you do not have value. Jealousy scans for evidence to prove the point – that others will be preferred and rewarded more than you.

TOBIAS FUNKE!!!!

why did they take that show off? ;(

This girl should quit trying so hard. She could be a real talent if she would just cool it with the southern girl act. I know she’s from Texas, but to me she just always seems like she’s trying to force the issue on everyone and using it to sell herself and it really falls flat. I liked her better when she dressed nice and sang pretty.

does this woman own a mirror?

#44 Yeah yeah yeah, we’ll are jealous uggo fatties and haterz here – every 14 year old girl who still loved chubby Britty Spears when she shaved her head beat that one to death so you know where that puts you, dude. If you like the look, fine. But here’s a radical concept for ya, not everyone who dislikes thick muscular legs in strappy sandals under a body crammed into too-tight clothing is a jealous hating fatty. It’s called taste. We also know we have value and unlike Jessica we don’t have to dress like this out of desperation to prove it. If her looks are now a sexual turnoff because she indulged in a lot of overeating and she’s still promoting herself as sexy, people will react. accordingly. And just so you know Jessica won’t be calling to thank you and autograph your Sociology 101 textbook anytime soon.

Annyong!