Jessica Simpson is backwards evolving

May 4th, 2006 // 121 Comments
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superficial

  1. Mr_White_Secure_American

    LIBTARDS!

  2. doesntmatter

    um, she looks awful. how about that. her sister is more awful though. i’m allowing here this grace period, only this once though. c’mon jessica, get a new stylist or something! now!!!!!!!

  3. Italian Stallion

    Nice suitcase, is her fading career in there?

  4. doesntmatter

    actually, i think i just figured it out. she looks like her hair stylist. look at that first photo, her sucked in face looks just like his! ahhh.

    frightening.

  5. inspector11

    about a year ago, i specifically remember wanting to have outrageous monkey sex with her. and man is the old saying right on the mon(k)ey – “be careful what you wish for…”

    on the other hand, at least she looks like crap.

  6. BigJim

    The “O” shape on her mouth is the first two pics is her warming up to go home to her daddy.

    Damn, but she looks like she fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

  7. ms.magoo

    She should really lay off the bleach, and shut her mouth. I bet that’s why she’s such a dumbass. She’s held that position too long and her lil’ ol’ brain just rolled out.

  8. auh2o

    She doesn’t look that bad, she just doesn’t have all the make up and shit on. I’d still make sweet love to her all night long.

    Plus she’s leading the charge in the celebrity fad of having a pet hair dresser. How do you respect yourself when that’s your job: B-celebrity lackey?

  9. watcher

    she is fat.

  10. Ez-EEEE

    im confused, if thats her hair dresser, why the fuck isnt her hair fixed?

    ill fix her hair for her, with a hammer.

  11. evilcookie007

    She looks like a tranny with a bad Mystic Tan.

  12. CoJo

    She is like five minutes away from turning into MeganHarris, or this chick…

    http://www.lesliehall.com/8-sweaters1.html

    Sorry. While I do consider myself a regular, I can’t remember why everyone hates Megan Harris, but this is pretty funny if it’s what she really looked like…

  13. SusanJones1

    What happened to her looks? Now they match her brain! I wouldnt think that being married to that Lachey Loser would have a positive apperance effect on a person- but in this case, maybe? She should be with him again- and get her looks back. Or maybe she is finally starting to show the miles from having relations with her pig father for so long. Given time, I bet ashley will start to look worse.

  14. Tha-Flash

    Damn she’sssssssssssssssssssssss fine!

  15. Ez-EEEE

    lmao, nothing like gold spandex to make the day. but thats not megan harris, the spandex would show off her penis too much.

  16. ELLABELLA

    I don’t get you people!! She is not fat or ugly. Maybe you should look in the mirror. Give the bimbo a break–she might be stupid but NOT fat and ugly.

    GEEZ

  17. Anniebear

    Why is her “hairdresser” always with her??

  18. L.

    She’s gained a lot of weight. Damn……

  19. watcher

    she is as fat as hell. i am a bit skinnier than her. i should know, i looked in the mirror.

  20. smutalicious

    and here I thought vince neil just finally decided to get rid of the handband and drop a few pounds

  21. smutalicious

    head band that is

  22. Jacq

    #12 – Is that latex or is that fat-ass sitting on 2 balloons? I heart MeganHarris in gold pants.

    #10 – Haven’t seen you in a while – I’m glad you’re back with a vengence.

    Bitch is carrying my Chanel bag.

    My bet is that #16 thinks Ella is bella. You are fat and ugly. And, before you say it, I HAVE seen you. I’M WATCHING YOU.

  23. Astriastar

    Her hairdresser is Adrian Brody???

  24. Geno

    #20-Vince Neil..bwahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!
    http://catholictvguy.blogspot.com/

  25. Jacq

    Any news from the Britney press conference yet? I’m sure it will be awesomly Brit-ripping good.

  26. watcher

    i am still skinnier.

  27. Trotter

    @6 Too funny dude.

    She looks like Mercedes Rhuel with a bad bleach job.

  28. 86

    They always turn to their hairdressers in a time of crisis.

  29. pinky_nip

    If she doesn’t shape up soon, the only gig she’ll have is an appearance on Celebrity Fit Club.

  30. 86

    She used to show her boobs alot more. Now she’s all covered up. Did she gain weight since dukes of hazzard or something? You’d think she’d be partying like crazy…that’s what she did before the breakup so what has changed??

  31. I’m almost positive they are banging. And that guy is a huge druggie. peeps down here have told me stories.

  32. ELLABELLA

    Jacq-nice to have admirers but no thanks-keep your CUD to yourself.

  33. 86

    Yeah 25 I’m anxious to hear also.

  34. Whatever, so you guys found my picture on the internet. you know what? I don’t care. And even if that is an old picture, I’m still cute. and i know it. I’m not fat whores like the dyke crew here.

  35. Grphdesi23

    Makeup, sweetie. Use it.

  36. Fisher55

    she looks like Heather Locklear’s retarded older sister

  37. downshine

    no wonder she looks like a baboon, he ex-husband actually has a career-and she doesn’t. its strange how roles can reverse like that…

  38. Tracie

    My God, she looks to be in her 40s! It seems even the Mystic Tan damages your skin.
    Speaking of Simpsons, has anyone seen Ashlee post-nose job yet?

  39. Fisher55

    btw, is anyone else here having nightmares involving that asian “hedonistica” chick up there?

  40. ELLABELLA

    #39 ummm–YES!

  41. radio4play

    freaking FIRST!!

    she looks like her usual self..so this is news..

    Thomas come save us…tcltc..

  42. Fisher55

    and what’s george lopez doing in the background?

  43. Tracie

    You mean freaking forty-FIRST!! LOL…try refreshing next time. ;)

  44. Fisher55

    wow, she’s really feminine and elegant-looking in these photos (but jessica looks like shit)

  45. 86

    She doesn’t look happy anymore.

  46. missscoobie

    are we sure that’s not David Lee Roth? Cause bitch has his hair down pat.

  47. OK Go with me on this, but isnt’ she starting to look kind of like that famous tranny Amanda Lepore?

    http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2004/09/09/heaterette2_gallery__331x550,0.jpg

  48. Italian Stallion

    @34 MeganHarris if you think your cute you are sadly mistaken. That picture is the ugliest, pastey, looking bitch I’ve ever seen. I can understand why you don’t go out in the sun though it’s not nice to scare children at play and I’m sure you get tired of horror film directors bugging you to be in their films, I guess after the Excorsist you decided to end that career……..

    Like I said before your face needs
    A) windex
    B) plastic surgery
    C) a bag
    D) holy water
    E) see all of the above

    The answer is def. E

  49. newbondsux

    just googled megan harris…still love her.

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