Jessica Simpson is a mom, you guys

The Superficial / September 18, 2009

And The Sad Saga of Jessica Simpson’s Missing Dog has finally come to an end. TMZ reports the animal group assisting Jessica in the search of her coyote-snatched Malti-Poo has been called off:

Sources close to the situation tell us Simpson and the FindToto.com people have exhausted every possible resource to find Jessica’s precious Daisy — last spotted in the grasp of a wild coyote.
We’re told Simpson’s camp used tracking dogs, scoured neighborhoods, put up posters, power-dialed neighbors and did everything else they could to find a clue … but came up short.

Because what good is Twitter if you can’t post sad delusions? Jessica says she’ll continue searching because, dammit, she’s a mother:

Still holding out hope despite the assholes that say is it a dumb thing to do. Daisy is my baby…why would I stop searching? I’m a mom.

Look, I don’t want to shit on pet owners here, but Jessica saying she’s a mom like her sister (See what’s happening here?) isn’t exactly a legitimate comparison. I’ve yet to see a dog that’s needed a ride to baseball practice, wrecked a car on prom night or come out of the closet during Thanksgiving dinner. Unless there’s some magical breed I’m not aware of that transforms into a human baby if you wish really, really hard.

Photos: WENN