Jessica Simpson didn’t ride the Tiger

December 17th, 2009 // 30 Comments

Jessica Simpson is denying reports she had sex with Tiger Woods. Via Twitter:

Can’t believe that I’m on the cover of star magazine with Tiger Woods, what a JOKE! “The Shocking Inside Story” is (insert drumroll) A LIE!

Meanwhile, Joe Simpson has issued the following tweet:

@Tiger, I can make it happen if you let me be your manager. And watch. In a cowboy outfit. (Don’t ask questions.) #daughterloversrawk

Photos: Splash News

  1. obz

    if he aint gunna hit it i will.

  2. obz

    and hit it hard.

  3. B

    Yeah, the popover ads have got to go, Fish. That’s fucking awful.

  4. Doc Schweinstrudel

    If it weren’t Tiger WHO fucked her so silly?

  5. Richard McBeef

    the pop-up ad stuff is not acceptable.

  6. nADA

    God that is the funniest thing I ever read

  7. havoc

    But in the first photo, isn’t that Tiger’s hand reaching for one of her breasts?



  8. Milandir

    I am waiting to hear that Tiger fucked Lisa Simpson

  9. Rich

    ewwww, who would wanna even touch that ugly fat sow much less fuck her?

  10. Rich, even as a female, I can name PLENTY of men who would touch AND fuck her. Needless to say, I think you’d have to be an idiot to think she would have sex with Tiger Woods.

  11. i think

    superfish shouldn’t have even posted that entry yesterday and this one today.
    it was so fake.

    @11 even as a female?

    you make it sound like females are incapable of coming up with deductions.
    I’m not trying to be mean or anything but just be more careful when you word something.
    I knew what you meant though.

  12. Bill

    So wait… did Jessica Simpson’s dad just offer to let Tiger Woods bang his daughter if he agrees to let him be his manager?

  13. rosy

    What a great woman. She is way out of tiger’s league anyway!

  14. Uh, Bill (#13) – do you know that the word “gullible” isn’t in the dictionary?

  15. Uh, Bill (#13) – do you know that the word “gullible” isn’t in the dictionary?

  16. Uh, Bill (#13) – do you know that the word “gullible” isn’t in the dictionary?

  17. Kilmer

    Proof that there some fat skanks even Tiger won”t bang.

  18. Haha, good Dad impression. Except he would have referenced her “double D’s” somewhere in there fa sho.

    On a more serious note I thought that was the dumbest thing I’ve seen a tabloid mag report in quite a while, not that Star is reputable or anything.

  19. lil drip

    NO WAY she fucked him, but she probably blew him

  20. Boogeyman King Dong

    She did allow Daisy to sit on his lap.

  21. Oh OF COUUUURSE #12, I will try to “be better” next time and word my inductions better for you. If you knew what I meant (pretty sure 99% of people would), why take the time to “like try not to be mean and stuff”? HA, how childish. People, I swear….LOL

  22. r4i

    Well its good to know that the Jessica didn’t ride the tiger. Its bad for the tiger tough.:)

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  24. She was only there for a few hours to sing the national anthem.

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