Jessica Simpson has gigantic breasts

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So after the VMA madness of yesterday, nothing cleanses the palate like boobs. Good, old-fashioned gigantic boobs. Brought to you today by Jessica Simpson who, when’s she not looking like an over-tanned duck, has actually been kind of hot lately. I had no idea she was packing such heavy equipment. Downright medicinal. Cancer patients are looking at these pics and now only have a mild cold. It’s true, I’m practically a doctor. I’ve got the lab coat, prescription pad and, yeah, maybe I’m not wearing pants. I’m like that guy from House. I play by my own rules, but instead of saving lives and being an asshole about it, I just look at boobs. Who’s the real hero? Me. Dr. Boob-looker, M.D.