Jessica Simpson has curly hair. STOP EVERYTHING IN THE ENTIRE WORLD!

January 6th, 2010 // 69 Comments

Somehow Jessica Simpson having curly hair has become the most pervasive news story of the morning, so here she is in LA last night showing off her new do. I guess I’m supposed to be titillated with excitement, but I’m mostly finding myself wondering if her breasts could suffocate a man. That’s right, I can be deep and philosophical, too. (Suck it, Deepak.)


  1. afgan


  2. jim eh

    She’s hot! Always was IMO, but she’s not a talented singer/actress.

  3. Jess


    Hot ?? WTF?? Did you even look at picture #6 that is as far from hot as it gets.

  4. Truth

    This is the ghost of Jessica Simpson which, frankly, I prefer.

  5. josh


  6. Business on the bottom, party on the top.

  7. Parker

    I’m wondering how warm it must feel inside her ass.

  8. Melissa

    The pictures of her coming out of the doorway look really good. I actually thought she looked cute as hell. Then I started skimming through them, and they just got worse and worse. In some of them, she reminded me of Dina Lohan. That’s never a good thing…

  9. m

    She’s ugly.

  10. Kelly

    Looking desperate. Curly hair = distract from the fatness.

  11. andy7171

    She could be the perfect female.

  12. Valerie

    She looks even more stupid.

  13. Keith

    She looks horrible without makeup. Her nose is freakish.

  14. jim eh

    @3 : you’re probably some ugly fat chick, stfu, I like her, and taste is not debatable.

  15. Fat Chicks Suck

    She looks fine when she has her fat arms and gut covered up

  16. Horny

    Still hot as hell.

  17. Just saying

    Pretty, pretty face. Killer smile.

  18. Randal

    Jessica, with your bleached out bimbo blonde hair (on top dear, not the tangled mane of dirty black pubic hair infested with last week’s shitty toilet paper and tampon fragments) and shaved mannish muscular legs accentuated by a pair of Wallmart Miley Cyrus gym shorts, Goober Pickens jacket and tennis shoes laden with dog shit on the bottom, you are truly one big titted moron. A credit to the industry!


  19. superking

    She`s fucking hot. Shut up kiddies

  20. StuntMom

    why bother stalking her and taking pics of her and then putting up a headline like that? i don’t think she asked you to write a story and take pics of her new hairstyle.

  21. JiggaJay


  22. Dear Heavenly Father,

    Please deliver me into the arms and between the breasts of Jessica Simpson. It would make this lesbian’s year, and you know how rough my 2009 was.



  23. David

    She has a nice face without makeup. She’s got nice hair, too, assuming that this is how it looks naturally. A lot of people hate on this look, but I’m a guy and I think it’s hot.

  24. David

    She has a nice face without makeup. She’s got nice hair, too, assuming that this is how it looks naturally.

    A lot of people hate on this look, but I’m a guy and I think it’s hot. There’s something really incredibly sexy about not doing anything special in the morning and still looking really feminine and pretty. It looks confident, in a good way, to walk around like that, too.

  25. Ben

    I say she looks really cute and normal!

  26. Ben

    I say she looks really cute and normal!

  27. The 'AINTS Suck

    I’d sniff her brown(or pink) eye.

  28. Jess


    Its ok if your into manly women dude don’t be embarrassed, just keep tuging on it but its cornhole only for your future and you now it, keep bending over and grabbing your ankles…practice makes perfect.

  29. Hank

    Nice hair. On a short fattie with a face like a pro wrestler.

  30. The girl has GORGEOUS hair, no doubt about it. I think she has a different looking nose, but then again…I do too and I don’t get too many complaints. I think she’s pretty and looks great without make up. Some of you people are out of your minds, lol. Besides, it looks like she’s been hitting the gym again. Look at her legs, they are hot!

  31. charles

    Look at all the ugly people in the background in these pics. That’s a good P.R. strategy – when your career as a former hottie is failing, never been seen next to someone normal looking – it will reveal how far you’ve fallen, when you look just like them.

  32. jaime

    dude, if you cover her face in that first picture, she actually looks hot.

  33. Keyshia

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  34. me again

    she’s a natural beauty. I think she’s pretty – always have.

  35. Mr. Lahey

    Nice symbolism there Jessica.

  36. fluffer

    Natural?? She can not leave her house any day of the week without her private hairdresser Ken Paves attaching her extensions or wig of the day. She’s very open about it, and sells a line of hair extentions. can you imagine accidentally yanking it out during sex? EEEEK!

  37. if she cut the hair short she maybe look like a man i think~~~lol
    click my name for her bikini photos

  38. i look at jessica simpson and now i am sad. Penis is down and my hand is cold. No jerky for me today. Tomorrow is another day

  39. missywissy

    I love that celebs are going without make up. That’s fucking awesome! Just think, if everything went natural???????? No silicone, no surgeries, no make up, no fake tans, fake teeth, no air brushing… whoa! Nothing to spank off to but how we were created. That can’t be sexy, can it?

  40. She really looks beautiful and very cute. The curls look really awesome.

  41. Thanks for such interesting reading you provide on your site. Will
    return for sure.

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    for more..thanks!

  43. cc

    She is less than plain without make up. Another utterly manufactured celebrity. If you walked by her in the supermarket you wouldn’t look twice.

  44. jon


  45. She's Alright

    In these pics she looks most like herself and the prettiest I have seen her.

  46. Aims

    I’m gonna have to be honest and say she looks like a MAN in the first one… A MAN with a wig.

  47. em

    Her legs are stumpy and massive. Her face is masculine. Her hair is ugly. The rest of her is fat.

  48. terri

    she has the most amazing legs ever

  49. Your posts are always interesting to read. Always a joy returning.

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