Jessica Simpson dates Quasimodo
People magazine reports that Jessica Simpson is dating John Mayer despite the scientific evidence suggesting he may, in fact, be the ugliest man on Earth.
“She’s tiptoeing back into the dating world,” a source tells People. “It’s the first stage. She’s never been happier.”
I can’t tell if this is worse than James Blunt dating Petra Nemcova. They’re both anomalies of nature, but I fear this time God has gone too far. He might as well start mating horses with rhinoceroses. Although that might actually be kind of cool because their offspring would probably be unicorns. And just cause, here’s Jessica Simpson at the release party of her new album yesterday, where she lost her voice and had to postpone a TV appearance.