Jessica Simpson breaks her nose

August 17th, 2007 // 82 Comments
jessica-simpson-set-candids-00.jpg

Jessica Simpson broke her nose while filming her new movie Major Movie Star when she fell over and hit her face. She says:

“I was running with a gun over my head and fell over and broke my nose, it really hurt!”

This just sounds like an excuse to get a nose job with no questions asked. Although I don’t doubt she actually broke it. This is Jessica Simpson we’re talking about. I wouldn’t doubt if she starved to death because she wouldn’t stop petting a mailbox she thought was a dog.


  1. Meh?

    First

  2. Mike

    ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……ha… HA… Ha….hA….. HA……

  3. kathy

    she’s a douche. who gives a fuck?

  4. Meh?

    When you fall over, you generally don’t try to break the fall with your face…wouldn’t you put your arms down first?

  5. Mike

    I think it’s pronounced duece.

  6. Triana

    was her nose f-ed up to begin with?

  7. Skyler

    As long as she didn’t break her tits she’ll be okay.

  8. kathy

    i personally favor bag ‘o douche. say it really fast and it sounds fancy.

  9. kathy

    i’m also surprised that she didn’t bounce right back up once her tits hit the ground. you know? like one of those clowns that you punch???

  10. She better get her nose fixed. It’s essential that your nose works when your giving blowjobs.

  11. gotmilk?

    yeah, you’d think her giant cans would break the fall.

    from her statement, it doesn’t sound like she hit herself with the gun. get the story straight.

  12. lambman

    See Ashlee (god that spelling still annoys me) had a nosejob because her nose was f’ed up, and she looks better now.

    Jessica’s problem isn’t her nose, I don’t know what it is….but its not her nose

  13. Fag Finder

    Is that the way you do it TT?

  14. Mike

    Why would you guys say Jessica has problems? I am the one with problems, can’t figure out how I can receive blow jobs via my computer. Or how I can fuck somebody via the computer.

  15. Mike

    Normally I just thumb my assholes instead.

  16. molly

    lambman- it’s her giant horse jaw. She looks just like her dad would in drag.

  17. Tim

    She needs a “face job” if anything. Sure, her body is grate but she looks l ike a retarded younger version of Anna Nicole.

  18. Mike

    #15, if you are trying to be me, I only have one asshole, I don’t have assholes.

  19. Mike

    Actually I have two assholes.
    One for my big ass in the back and another for my little ass in the front.

  20. no1justminda

    I agree!!!! an excuse to get a nose job!

  21. @13, you bet, you’ve got to have a good breathing technique.

  22. Mikey

    What the fuck is up with this post. Just a bitch there doing nothing. Can’t we get some of her nude or something? Get some more pictures of a girl in a bikini or something, not this fully clothed chick.

  23. Kim

    Ah, there’s nothing sexier than shoulder blades that protrude 4″ from your back. Skeletal is SO in!

  24. a

    No worries. i’m sure the last one is still under warrenty.

  25. ssdd

    TT ~ i agree on that.

    Jessica may or may not have really broke her nose… who knows?.. Either way if it was for a nose job she would have done the nose job anyways……. but yeah normally one would break the fall ……………. I think Jessica is an alright girl….she’s had her dumb moments .. and whatever happened with her and Nick I dunno… but at LEAST she is not out doing like Brit, Paris or Blohan … with that being said doesn’t she deserve some credit?……..uh huh …

  26. jakebarnes

    Haha starving to death petting a mailbox you thought was a dog. Top form, Superfish.

  27. You people are idiots.

    Chick is smokin’ hot.

    I’ll bet 90% of you still live with your moms.

  28. Doomhammer

    No way this story makes sense. Those big ass titties would have cushioned her fall. Im guessing someone stone cold punched her the fuck out. I know Id like to,m but I dont hit women, I just choke the shit of them.

  29. Mikey

    #27, I live with a mom, does that count?

  30. Penis Mightier

    Sounds like that’ll be a dilly of a pickle of a moive.

  31. HELP

    Well, I have to say, this is probably one of the dumbest things I’ve ever read. How do you fall to the ground without putting your arms out? Were her hands superglued to the gun? And she didn’t turn her head to the side or anything — just fell right on her face.

    This woman is as dumb as a box of rocks.

    Oh, and Mike, trust me — I’ve read your posts on other threads. You have multiple assholes. Kinda like multiple personalities.

  32. Tortured Soul

    #17 — Tim — I wouldn’t be calling anyone retarded if you’re going to say that her body is “grate.” The word is spelled “great” you moron.

  33. jenny

    #16
    I don’t think her ass-chin helps any either. Too bad she didn’t break that. She’s one chin-zit away from john travolta

  34. Henry Wankler

    A man runs into a bar and asks the barkeep, “Give me ten shots of your best whisky.” The bartender sets up the ten glasses. The man starts drinking them as quickly as the bartender serves them. The bartender asks, “Why are you drinking so fast?” “You’d drink fast too, if you had what I have.” The bartender asks, “What do you have?” “Seventy cents.”

  35. Sportsdvl

    Doesn’t anyone find the humor that she’s in a movie called “Major Movie Star”???

    Please tell me the credits will list her as: Bimbo in bar #2
    or something like that!

  36. justplainconfused

    What I want to know is who was dumb enough to give Jess a gun, even if it was a movie prop? With all the words of wisdom that came from her mouth during her reality show, did anyone doubt she would find a way to hurt herself with it????? Jess may well be a lifetime short school bus rider, but it doesn’t sound like the other people on the film were on loan from NASA either.

  37. Latoya Jackson

    Fell on her face….why am I not surprised…probably while running like a girl.

    Not for nothin’ but I like her nose, bump and all. It has character. Unlike mine, non existent. I just have two holes and a little umbrella on my face.

  38. justplainconfused

    Furthermore, there is only one thing Jessica should be allowed to put above her head:

    Her ankles

    Then, she couldn’t run.

  39. whackjob

    at least her eyes were protected by the safety goggles issued during the stunt.

    oh. her “glasses”. ok then.

    truly, this is the land of ridiculously large sunglasses. (see Suvino, Simpson, Ritchie, etc. postings).

    what the fuck. please pass the fad.

  40. egan

    I agree. Sounds like an excuse to go under the knife. She’s a sex symbol (for reasons I don’t understand) but that never helped a woman be satisfied with her looks. You just KNOW she’s always hated her nose. Whatever, she wants a nose job more power to her, I guess.

  41. Donkey

    No sir…. Not today….. I’m not buying it.
    Her nose doesn’t look that swollen to me.
    This is a nose job excuse or just a publicity stunt.

  42. That’s great. She might get a new nose but too job she can’t get some new acting ability as well. Word is this movie is absolutely terrible. This is the synopsis:

    When fluffy, bubble gum movie star Megan Parker suddenly finds herself broke and humiliated in the public eye, she wanders from the wreckage of a car accident and witlessly enlists in the U.S. Army hoping in vain that it will change her life.

    The Yeti
    http://www.wooohah.com
    So raw it hurts.

  43. I’d like to be shocked that someone who has an IQ almost equivalent to my dead goldfish would also be clumsy, but I just can’t somehow.

  44. doodie

    i wish i could have been the one to break her nose.

  45. Pedro

    Why hasn’t she gotten naked yet? That is the only thing that could be remotely interesting about her.

  46. UNCLE NED

    I think we all thought the same thing at once – definite nose job.

    I give Nick credit for dumping her. At the time I thought he was nuts, but time has proven him oh-so-right. His star ascended while hers fell quick.

  47. woodhorse

    #15 You the Man.

  48. woodhorse

    Top pic looks like Jennifer Aniston.

  49. UNCLE NED

    AND #42 – if you’re right, we’ve all seen that movie already. It was called Private Benjamin…

  50. she probably tripped over the dildo that fell out of her pocket

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