Jessica Simpson and John Mayer get it on in public

January 2nd, 2007 // 179 Comments
superficial

  1. Drusilla

    All I want for New Year’s are some new idjits to read about. Soooo tired of the same ol’, same ol’.

  2. gerald ford

    so jessica simpson finally has a talented pussy (mayer)

  3. Considering he CD and her last two movies have bombed I’m hoping that she’ll fade away.

    Then again Nichole Ritchie has no CD, no Movie, and no famous boyfriend but all the magazines are still printing stories on her skany ematiated, disease ridden ass.

  4. BarbadoSlim

    Crap I’m gonna have to avoid anything Greastina related I just had to de-grease my keyboard.

    sheeesh…

  5. BarbadoSlim

    Crap I’m gonna have to avoid anything Greastina related I just had to de-grease my keyboard.

    sheeesh…

  6. Missallanpoe

    I never really cared much for any of those people. I liked a few john mayer songs and a few christina songs..Jessica Simpson I’ve never liked. Someone should rob them for their money and digni-…well their money.

  7. Little boys are yummy and that Jordy Bratman is kinda cute, in a boyish sorta way.

  8. damon2020

    Wait, I thought he publically dumped her a while back?
    Either way, it is a gross thought.

    And Xtina still looks like a dirty whore.

  9. mztry

    LOSER! You aren’t posting pictures you don’t have and making STUPID excuses.

    DUMB!

  10. RichPort

    MMMMMMM… Aguilera is yummy. I’d spackle her face like Mexican day laborers renovating a house… or like Ass Ferret waking up his dad (shudder).

  11. wedgeone

    NO MORE TROLLS! NO MORE TROLLS!! Hip-Hip . . . HOORAY!!!

    Me thinks you maybe mistaken there “wedgeone”
    Where there is The Superficial, there will be trolls, always.

  12. Tracie

    All righty then, since it seems the SF is all over the place with who we’re writing about and whose pix are shown…..How about checking out the background blond girl in picture #3 of the series? She must have had Michael Jackson’s surgeon, no doubt.

  13. Pop Atlas

    Sorry, but I’m still finding it impossible to masturbate with Christina’s troll-like husband in these pics.

  14. cole007

    at least xtina doesn’t make me physically ill, like britney. at least xtina is wearing a dress and not just a baggy shirt like brit-brit did for new years.

    at least xtina is married to someone who seems to have a little bit of talent.

    at least xtina doesn’t have any c-section scars.

    #2, Mr. Former President Ford, you are correct, sir. Jessica finally has a talented pussy.

  15. Anonymous

    #10 how about joining jrz in her new year’s resolution?

  16. Christina’s brests confuse me….every time I see them they are a different size. Can’t she just pick a pair of implants and stick with them?

  17. lalalemon

    Xtina is about five pounds away from Nicole “medical school skeletal model” Richie. :-( And no, thick pancake makeup and 25 layers of ho-bag red revlon lipstick don’t count at the weigh-in.

  18. xtina looks good… at least i’m protecting my eyes from fuglies of Simpson and Mayer… ewww~

    http://www.burntcity.com

  19. jrzmommy

    how bout I broke my resolution?

  20. PrettyBaby

    #7 You are the worst sort of douchebag troll. Man, I hope you get investigated and REPORTED! You are unfunny, perverse and fucking lame and on top of that- it is beyond fucking uncool to write things about kids. Look within yourself and shut the fuck up.

  21. PrettyBaby

    #7 You are the worst sort of douchebag troll. Man, I hope you get investigated and REPORTED! You are unfunny, perverse and fucking lame and on top of that- it is beyond fucking uncool to write things about kids. Look within yourself and shut the fuck up.

  22. PrettyBaby

    It bears repeating.

  23. Mick

    Wow! does she look fantastic, and her husband is hot! I’m glad she is out of that dirty phase she went through with the black hair and ho clothes.

  24. Anonymous

    too much to hope for, i guess…

  25. Libraesque

    “pretty baby” kind of ironic that your screen name is the same as the title of a movie about a 12 year old growing up in a whore house………

  26. Libraesque

    “pretty baby” kind of ironic that your screen name is the same as the title of a movie about a 12 year old growing up in a whore house………

  27. RichPort

    #15 – hey ‘anonymous’, my resolution was to stop getting my dick sucked, but I broke that one already. Why don’t you and Ass Ferret share a nice shit sandwich?

  28. My eyes just got VD.

    mischa barton’s little sister goes wild at crabbie’s

  29. marme

    #16 I KNOW…it makes me think maybe they are real? but sometimes her tits just look too round and hard to be real.

  30. Ruby

    @9 – Whaa….? Ease up on the double negatives and YELLING. Your karma bullshit is gonna bite you in the cooter.

  31. biatcho

    Happy New Years Bitches! New Year, same old little pantywipes posting I see. Same old dykes trying to stir shit with a teaspoon.

  32. Anonymous

    for a few days, it was pretty nice here…sigh…welcome back, rich jrz biatcho…sigh…

  33. biatcho

    Thanks Anonymous!! How are you? Did you have a great weekend?? I TOTALLY did!!!
    Can’t wait to hear all about it!! LOL!!
    ROTFL!!! TCLTC!!!!!

  34. I think John Mayer is a good choice for the job of Jessica Simpson-banger. He plays guitar, plays college girls, and talks about it whenever he is interviewed.

    $20 on ass sex-talk making an appearence in a future interview.

  35. Libraesque

    aaawww biatcho, the first thing you do in the new year is mention me…..can’t get me off your mind can you?
    btw, you’re embarrassing yourself by still referring to me as a dyke

  36. maybe a little too much hate for john mayer, we thinks. he’s just doing what any of the rest of us would do

    http://www.carpemundus.com – waiting for the world to change

  37. PrettyBaby

    #25 & #26 Yes, God you are so right. I am a whore, so eh, who cares?? You however are attacking me cuz I am bitchin at a Pedophiling Troller. wTF? Do ya like that kind of thing? Huh, pretty sick.

  38. How is it that C.A. ended up not being the slutty one? And why does that make me so perversely happy?

  39. diamondprynzez

    Wow, Jessica Simpson sure looks great.

  40. Libraesque

    “prettybaby”…..interesting take on my post, dumbass.
    Pretty Baby was the name they gave a 12 year old girl who grew up in a whore house. Which means no one is calling you a whore….and no one is attacking you for “bitchin” at a pedtroller (which I’m guessing in reality he isn’t…just successful in getting a rise out of dumbasses)
    SO, once again it’s IRONIC that you’ve chosen a user name that is the same as a TWELVE YEAR OLD who grew up in a whore house……..do….you…get….it….now????????

  41. BarbadoSlim

    OMFG you really love that troll #40, and you sure ARE hung up on that movie with some 12year old, pervert, people go to jail for that shit.

  42. Libraesque

    Put the crack pipe down Slim, you’re not making ANY sense

  43. BarbadoSlim

    hehehehe nice

  44. Pete Doherty

    actually, at the risk of sounding like a drugged out zombie, i thought young brooke shields (prettybaby) was waaaaaaay cuter than older brooke shields turned out to be. somehow her face got thick and mannish, and those eyebrows went from exotic to foreboding, signaling perhaps a distressingly hirsuit taint. now where the fuck is that syringe???

  45. Libraesque

    HA!!
    I KNEW you saw that movie.
    Susan Sarandon was a hot mess in that movie……..still is

  46. Whammer Jammer

    Would someone kindly inform her that she is NOT and NEVER WILL BE Marilyn Monroe?

  47. JapGirl

    Just love the pics of her hubby in his U2 t-shirt. ??? Didn’t he get the memo that wifey was singing and it was New Year’s Eve and she sings that cracker jack pop music? What a dipshit! Looks like Xtina told him to put his ‘Nanook of the North’ coat on to hide that shit. I would have sent his ass home if I were her.

  48. BarbadoSlim

    The thing with Brooke is how amazing it is that she didn’t turn out like one of the other freaks. Her mom (who’s a straight out drunk) literally whored her at a very young age for Pretty Baby and Blue Lagoon , which was basically Cinemax soft porn.

  49. Courtney

    #46 – No, Christina has talent. And aside from being a little on the skinny side, she looks totally fabulous and you know it.

  50. biatcho

    It’s refreshing to see Lesbianesque is still annoying most everyone on this site. I thought it was just its obsession with me since I called it out of the closet last week. On the contrary, it is quite disturbing how It cannot differentiate between hollywood fiction & reality. Something thinks Prettybaby is real and that she probably has a “crush” on it…

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