Jessica Biel might be Gumby

October 5th, 2006 // 77 Comments
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Comments (77)

  1. Ruby | October 5, 2006 at 2:06 pm

    first! yipppppeeeeeee

    Reply
  2. Jacq | October 5, 2006 at 2:08 pm

    All this time I haven’t been working out because the gym is too expensive. I never knew I was such a sucker! The sidewalk is free – WHY DIDN’T I THINK OF THAT!

    Oh yeah, that’s why… Because I’m young, have high, firm titties and I don’t need to work out.

    Reply
  3. bornaconstance | October 5, 2006 at 2:09 pm

    now all she needs is pokey as a sidekick. maybe Matthew McConaughey

    Reply
  4. Jacq | October 5, 2006 at 2:09 pm

    Is she about to blow that guy? What CAN’T you do on a sidewalk?

    Reply
  5. Shaun | October 5, 2006 at 2:10 pm

    Yay! It’s Jessica Biel. Anyways.

    Reply
  6. saturnswirls | October 5, 2006 at 2:17 pm

    wow.. all i need to have a body like that is a rubber ball and a parking meter? screw you bally’s!

    Reply
  7. crystalballseesall | October 5, 2006 at 2:19 pm

    @4 She’s got a big smile on her face looking right at his crotch. She’s either smiling because she’s happy to blow him or laughing because she can’t find it.

    Reply
  8. slantingthroughdarkness | October 5, 2006 at 2:19 pm

    Great talent to have if you’re a plumber.

    http://slam-cut.blogspot.com

    Reply
  9. gatorbates | October 5, 2006 at 2:33 pm

    Wow. I’d eat a bowl full of her diarreah.

    F’ing H O T.

    Reply
  10. TheDarkLady | October 5, 2006 at 2:41 pm

    That isn’t something she could have done at home?
    We need to nip this trend in the bud, people. Do you really want to see photos of Paris or Kate Bosworth working out on a sidewalk like this? You all know that Superfish would post each and every eye-searing one of them.

    Reply
  11. sharkbite | October 5, 2006 at 2:41 pm

    At least it appears she earns her body, rather than starves it. She might do both.

    http://www.wehateeverybody.com

    Reply
  12. Madrid Marriott | October 5, 2006 at 2:43 pm

    There are snarky things that I could say, but really all of that is overshadowed by one clear fact: I truly would like to have my way with her. Thanks.

    Reply
  13. Holy Candy | October 5, 2006 at 2:45 pm

    I guess after The Illusionist flopped, she couldn’t afford a gym membership anymore.

    http://www.HolyCandy.com

    Reply
  14. Italian Stallion | October 5, 2006 at 2:48 pm

    I knew she got a Brazilian wax, but I didn’t know she knew Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. This is the bitch that should have got a hold of Paris. I’d pay to see that shit…………..

    Reply
  15. BigJim | October 5, 2006 at 2:54 pm

    I just came.

    Oh, and I call bullshit on the SF guy being “pretty familiar with the gym.”

    Guys who are familiar with the gym look like this: http://profiles.yahoo.com/therealbigjim68

    They don’t call me BigJim because of the size of my wang.

    Reply
  16. Haroof | October 5, 2006 at 2:56 pm

    Why do these moron celebrities continue to work out RIGHT outside their gyms??

    Are they really that gd starved for press??

    Especially that lesbo Biel. It’s not like she’s a nobody who never gets in People or Us.

    Pathetic.

    Reply
  17. TinMan | October 5, 2006 at 2:58 pm

    Yay, Jessica! She looks great and healthy women are very attractive!!

    Reply
  18. Angry Ferret Jones | October 5, 2006 at 3:11 pm

    I need to run a scam like this.

    Step 1 – Super hot girl comes to my “gym.”

    Step 2 – Super hot girl writes me a check.

    Step 3 – Send super hot girl out to the sidewalk to work out.

    Step 4 – Cash the check and run like a banshee with diarhea.

    Reply
  19. fro0ty | October 5, 2006 at 3:15 pm

    she is the hottest grumpy i know!

    playpacman.net

    Reply
  20. CelebSlam.com | October 5, 2006 at 3:23 pm

    I think I just touched myself

    http://www.celebslam.com

    Reply
  21. c | October 5, 2006 at 3:23 pm

    omg, could you imagine having sex with her? i need to start going to her gym.

    http://popanalysis.blogspot.com

    Reply
  22. bigponie | October 5, 2006 at 3:31 pm

    hey superfish dude, I need a closeup of her tat and while your at it, I need a closeup of her cunt also.

    get to it, chop chop…

    Reply
  23. HolisticWisdomcom | October 5, 2006 at 3:33 pm

    I think she is trying to do a cartwheel, someone should show her how to do it properly. Geez.

    http://www.holisticwisdom.com

    Reply
  24. LilRach | October 5, 2006 at 4:01 pm

    Why is this girl forever exercising on the side walk???
    I like this chick but geez! Something i can’t stand is when i’m driving down the road and you see some jogger that’s doing their strectches right there in front of everyone! Aren’t you meant to stretch before you go out to exercise???

    Bloody posers.

    Reply
  25. mrs.t | October 5, 2006 at 4:13 pm

    I would encourage my husband to hit that, just so I could watch that ass in motion.

    Reply
  26. Guy-Pierre | October 5, 2006 at 4:22 pm

    @15.. I was wishing upon a star that they called you BigJim because of the size of your wang.

    Your body looks fan-hot-tastic. Lovin it!

    Reply
  27. mrs.t | October 5, 2006 at 4:30 pm

    Guy-Pierre, your blog is about to become my homepage. The instructional post alone is well worth the admission price.

    Reply
  28. mrs.t | October 5, 2006 at 4:32 pm

    ….and, I am waiting for the Stallion to come back here with both guns a-blazing….it seems that he will not take kindly to the same-sex body compliments. But I could be wrong.

    Reply
  29. theblemish.com | October 5, 2006 at 4:51 pm

    Mmm yes, she’s looking a little less muscley in these. I’m halfway hard.

    http://theblemish.com

    Reply
  30. duds | October 5, 2006 at 5:04 pm

    My goodness, the girl is working out. I could understand the rants and raves if she were smoking crack or snorting coke. Give the girl a break, at least she’s healthy!

    *Sighs*

    Reply
  31. duds | October 5, 2006 at 5:06 pm

    #24:

    You obviously don’t exercise.
    People work out in the heat to sweat and burn more fat. As for streching by the side of the road? Jeez, louise, muscles get tired, cramped and need to constantly stretched……. Like I wrote earlier, you obviously DON’T WORK OUT!!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  32. krisdylee | October 5, 2006 at 5:09 pm

    The Gays love BigJim….

    and so do I…

    Reply
  33. krisdylee | October 5, 2006 at 5:17 pm
  34. libtard | October 5, 2006 at 5:20 pm

    Bigjim, thanks for clearing us up on that whole big penis rumor.

    Reply
  35. Danklin | October 5, 2006 at 5:26 pm

    She needs to stop working out her chest before she starts to look like Arnold. Seriously, look at her funbags, they’re more nonexistant than before.

    Reply
  36. sdcoyote | October 5, 2006 at 5:26 pm

    God, I want her. She is soooo freakin fine. Gimme, gimme, gimme….

    Reply
  37. LilRach | October 5, 2006 at 5:30 pm

    #31 Calm down man – i was just giving my opinion! I wasn’t saying anything was wrong with exercising outside i said stretching outside in public was weird!

    oh yeah and i go to a place called a gym – ever heard of one? If i exercised outside there would be too many guys having to grab their handy dandy notebooks.

    Reply
  38. Madrid Marriott | October 5, 2006 at 5:36 pm

    Anyone have a keyboard I could borrow? Mines is a little sticky.

    Reply
  39. Cruzadas | October 5, 2006 at 5:48 pm

    She’s extremely fuckable, and she knows it

    Reply
  40. Cruzadas | October 5, 2006 at 5:50 pm

    I would sell my grandmother to see this girl naked.

    Reply
  41. BigJim | October 5, 2006 at 6:12 pm

    Guy, I’m flattered, but I’m afraid I don’t swing that way.

    kris: that hubby of yours going out of town any time soon?

    Reply
  42. Guy-Pierre | October 5, 2006 at 7:28 pm

    @27&28.. mrs.t, thank you so much for the word of encouragement. It’s alot of hard (that word always makes me giggle) work/fun. Both the blog and the sexual doings.
    Stallion is a sweet, sweet man.

    Mr41.. A fellow always has his dreams.

    Reply
  43. Wampoon.com | October 5, 2006 at 7:39 pm

    So Graceful…so tasteful.

    http://wampoon.com

    Reply
  44. Angry Ferret Jones | October 5, 2006 at 7:48 pm

    ***WHAT THE HELL?***

    Stop what you are doing at follow the link at # 33!!

    For the love of all that is sacred, that is the gayest thing I have ever seen!

    Reply
  45. ApacheRose | October 5, 2006 at 8:10 pm

    Krisdylee and Ferret–

    It’s pretty damn bad when the best looking one of the lot is William H. Macy, don’tcha think?

    Speechless just about covers it, yeah. And nauseating…

    Reply
  46. James | October 5, 2006 at 8:22 pm

    If she were so retarded I’d give her a “workout” and not in public like this staged crap.

    Reply
  47. Doc | October 5, 2006 at 8:54 pm

    definitely the best ass in Hollywood… no question…

    Reply
  48. blueballs | October 5, 2006 at 9:17 pm

    I know exactly where she works out and you don’t.

    Reply
  49. GG1000 | October 5, 2006 at 9:36 pm

    Jesus, what’s with these chicks on the frickin’ sidewalk? I know Jessica Biel and Kate Beckinsale are B-list celebrities and don’t get the big parts, but I’ve just got your standard-type job and I can afford a 24-hour Fitness membership – I’m sure they could spring for even the multi-club LA Fitness deal on what they make. Yo, ladies, actions at this level of pathetic-ness to get attention do not make you a hot commodity, they make you look like a sad attention slut.

    Reply
  50. Alex | October 6, 2006 at 12:49 am

    Damn. I may just see another erection in my lifetime just thinking of what that mink go do in the sack. Not sure though, after that Carter-Carrot bullshit.

    Reply

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