Jessica and Ashlee Simpson were spotted leaving Koi together wearing matching red lipstick on their face. Although to stand out, Jessica thought she’d attend dinner looking like a tranny. Mission status? Accomplished.
Thanks to the oddly named Jelly for the tip.
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| No bras here. – The Chive |
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Danner | January 19, 2007 at 8:12 am
LOL
Street whores!
BarbadoSlim | January 19, 2007 at 8:12 am
So papa joe had a nice freaky three way then.
~!@#$%^&* | January 19, 2007 at 8:14 am
“Jessica, point to your penis, sweetie!”
NipsyHustle | January 19, 2007 at 8:18 am
hooker dee and hooker dumb. you figure it out.
magickal | January 19, 2007 at 8:20 am
~Boo~Snicker~Hisssssss!!!
I hate these two. Although, Ashless looks much, much prettier after all the plastic surgery. But nothing can fix the look of pathetic washed up failure on Jess.
misanthrope | January 19, 2007 at 8:20 am
Joe Simpson must be using red lipstick on his dick.
magickal | January 19, 2007 at 8:21 am
Woops ~ AshLEE not AshLESS. Although, ASSless would have been appropriate.
anothershityear | January 19, 2007 at 8:48 am
this looks like a contest:
how much untalented disappointing failure can possibly be crammed into a single photo?
(answer: with these two alone, a hell of a lot)
the chick in the background looked better than either of these two in her day, and by the looks of it didn’t need a plastic nose to do it
and btw, jess. simpson is around 5’1″ right?
and she’s towering over the dee-clown (thx #4 hilarious!) in this pic
how (non-) tall is a. simpson?? 4’7″????
DrunkBlogger | January 19, 2007 at 8:49 am
I had a 3some with them and now both of my balls are bright red!!! Hey-oh!!! Unfunny joke!!!!
anothershityear | January 19, 2007 at 8:53 am
j. simps. looks like freddy mercury in a blonde wig in this pic
(sorry freddy — no offense)
#2 & #6 good ones, always up for creepy-ass joe-s humor
ok enough bullshitting around, back to my shit-job now
MissLaVey | January 19, 2007 at 8:54 am
Who the hell still wears red lipstick, anyway? I always thought it looked like hell on 99% of people.
danielle | January 19, 2007 at 8:55 am
They’ve got to be the fugliest pair of sister’s on the market to date. No, wait. The Olsen Smurf’s top that list…then the Simpsons. Or maybe it’s the Olsen’s, Hilton’s and then the Simpson’s.
Hell…
Just throw a wet brick at each of ‘em to even the playing field.
Pointandlaugh | January 19, 2007 at 8:57 am
oooooooo how F-ing HOT would it be to get a 3-some with those whores? Seriously. Holy shit. I would tap those asses with the finesse of Ike Turner.
wedgeone | January 19, 2007 at 9:08 am
“Jess? Jess is dead, my friend. You can call me Joker and as you can see I’m a lot happier.”
One more thing: “this world needs an enema” starting with these two.
Jacquelantern | January 19, 2007 at 9:17 am
Ashlee is way hotter than Jessica.
ming | January 19, 2007 at 9:18 am
wait…isn’t that marilyn manson and his new girlfriend?
jrzmommy | January 19, 2007 at 9:20 am
I’ve been unable to comment because I keep falling asleep when I look at this thread.
cruzin333 | January 19, 2007 at 9:29 am
American Idol recently held auditions in Seattle with a woman who strikingly resembled these two Simpsons, with the fire hydrant red lipstick and a “sexy” look, the whole deal.
She sang “Don’t Cha” (wish your girlfriend was hot like me…) and I bet she was even as good a singer as these girls. *(sarcasm)*
Shocking, I know.
GeannaSparrow | January 19, 2007 at 9:31 am
Haaaa. Jessica looks like a damn flasher.
86 | January 19, 2007 at 9:37 am
Trannies!!!!!!!!!!!
Mo | January 19, 2007 at 9:44 am
Somebody’s been playing in Cameron Diaz’ closets again.
google | January 19, 2007 at 9:48 am
Ok, something more entertaining – this may be the greatest illegal performance-enhancing drug story ever in the history of sports:
“AC Milan striker Marco Boriello tested positive for cortisone after his side was beaten 2-1 by Roma last November… But he blamed his girlfriend, Argentine model Belen Rodriguez, 22, for his positive result in the test due to a cream she used to cure a vaginal infection – which he unwittingly “ingested” whilst paying attention to the aforementioned part of her rather delectable anatomy. Though it probably wasn’t that delectable at the time, hence the cream. A cunning excuse for sure.”
http://www.tuttogossip.com/foto-vip/Foto-Belen-Rodriguez.php
86 | January 19, 2007 at 9:53 am
I wouldn’t stand right next to Ashlee if I was Jessica.
BarbadoSlim | January 19, 2007 at 9:54 am
@22…He’s using the “my girlfriend’s twat” defense. How considerate of him, and classy.
Dean | January 19, 2007 at 9:55 am
I wonder if one put the lipstick on, they made out, then it was on both of them…
jrzmommy | January 19, 2007 at 10:06 am
“My Girlfriend’s Taco Has Too Much Cheese: A Step-by-Step Guide to Self-Ruination of Every Man’s Dream of Fucking a Super Model”……by Marco Boriello
jesseeca | January 19, 2007 at 10:10 am
jessica looks possesed, ashley looks like she’s on something & they both look like jessica’s dog. run a comb through that mess! or maybe they’re both wearing one of jessica’s wigs.
biatcho | January 19, 2007 at 10:15 am
#22 That was excellent. Just another fucking cheating Italian Footballer.
They should be banned from Champions League play I say!
misanthrope | January 19, 2007 at 10:18 am
@22… His gal’s fun time area must be pretty alluring if he went on ahead and visited it with vaginal cream and all. And quite passive-aggressive on her part…. ‘Should I tell him or should I let the asshole eat yeast cream?’
ch474 | January 19, 2007 at 10:21 am
Time for a visit from Miss Cairol for these two.
cole007 | January 19, 2007 at 10:34 am
oh god, they want to be the olsen twins so bad they can hardly stand it!
HAHRHAHRHAHAHAH!HH!H!!
Peter Coffin | January 19, 2007 at 10:51 am
Holy shit… Ashlee looks nothing like she used to. That is scary.
wedgeone | January 19, 2007 at 11:04 am
@22 – Thanks for making the thread attached to this useless article worth rereading. Anyone want to take bets on when Beckham pulls this excuse out when he starts his soccer career in the US?
I say before the end of the 2007 season, we all find learn that Posh’s snatch is mean & green.
wedgeone | January 19, 2007 at 11:05 am
“finally learn”, not find learn.
Sorry.
F-Sucker | January 19, 2007 at 11:50 am
Just throw me in between them with some Jello.
BarbadoSlim | January 19, 2007 at 12:02 pm
This is very difficult for me but, this is how I feel about Victoria Beckham: I’d rather risk my life hitting Paris’ fetid rathole than hit that sour Highlander cunt.
*shudders*
HollyJ | January 19, 2007 at 12:21 pm
Anyone who thinks they’re opposed to cosmetic surgery needs to seriously reconsider after seeing these two next to each other BEFORE and AFTER. Ashlee’s gorgeous now. I glad she cut off her beak. But I hate both of their chin butts.
jraleigh | January 19, 2007 at 12:51 pm
Does anyone else notice that it looks like Jessica is trying to masturbate through her coat?
spunkbubble on J.alba's face | January 19, 2007 at 3:32 pm
who’da thunk that Ashlee would be hotter with her sister? She was only one nose job away this entire time.
Butterfly | January 19, 2007 at 5:47 pm
Why didn’t someone tell these two to blot their lips. It looks like they’re wearing those wax lips!
bootrungar | January 19, 2007 at 5:52 pm
the next Barbi twins have arrived
Dejasade | January 19, 2007 at 5:53 pm
OH GOOOODDDDDDDD THEY ARE SOOOOOOO GROOOOOOOSSSSSS!! DISGUSTING TRAILER TRASH CLOWNS HAHAHA. They are BOTH SO DESPERATE, TOO!!!!!!!!!
dystopia | January 19, 2007 at 7:47 pm
With that sneer, Jessica looks like the Joker. Only uglier.
shofaz | January 20, 2007 at 12:28 am
Jessica is so f*ckin’ ugly!!! OMG botox is eating her face… gross!!!
Ashlee is the perfect example of how a plastic surgery can be something good for ugly people. Sometimes. She looks beautiful. Only that poor Jess is completely the opposite. Bad surgery happens, you know… look at her!!!
Fetusiastic | January 20, 2007 at 8:16 am
Est
you_betcha_iris | January 20, 2007 at 5:43 pm
26: that was rotten dot com :) LOVES IT
pookiedoo | January 20, 2007 at 6:53 pm
Jess looks like she’s trying to surreptitiously adjust her maxipad. Maybe that’s NOT lipstick on their lips.
I must vomit now.
allgravybaby | January 20, 2007 at 8:35 pm
FAKE HAIR
FAKE LIPS
FAKE NOSES..
enough said
Nikky Raney | January 21, 2007 at 10:11 am
ashlee looks so different since her surgery
wedgeone | January 21, 2007 at 5:31 pm
#45 – Que’?