Jessica Alba wants to sue Playboy

March 1st, 2006 // 106 Comments

jessica-alba-playboy.jpgJessica Alba is threatening to sue Playboy for putting her image on their cover, claiming that Hugh Hefner & Co. are trying to make it seem that she appears in a “nude or semi-nude pictorial.” The Smoking Gun has a copy of the legal threat letter which requests that Playboy cease distributing the magazine and provide Alba with a “monetary settlement” for its unauthorized use of her image for commercial purposes.

The ploy might have worked better if Playboy had picked a somewhat new image as opposed to the Into the Blue promo that everybody’s already seen. It’d be like Newsweek putting the Ghostbusters poster on their cover and pretending they’ve got exclusive pictures of Bill Murray with real live ghosts.



  1. Baroness

    Is anyone else sick of Jessica Alba?

  2. downshine

    im sick of hugh heffner.

  3. chelleann66

    More like Jessica Alba-tross …

    around our effing necks…

  4. SumLikeitHoTT

    hell i would get more money too, can u blame her>?

  5. Grphdesi23

    I thought she wasn’t into posing nude. Guess I was wrong.

  6. Grphdesi23

    Wait until her parents get a load of this!

  7. Jessica, you are on the cover of Playboy, you dirty dirty slutbag. So you didn’t agree to pose for them, so what, you’re a shameful whore now, a dirty filthy little nasty bitch, thats right, thats what you are. Now go get Jenny McCarthy some toilet paper.

  8. Grphdesi23

    This is the same reaction Kid Rock gave after he found out his sex tape with Scott Stapp was released.

    If you’re going to pose for playboy, then be very aware that there might be a tiny bit of nudity in the magazine. At least that’s what I heard.

    I wonder if she realized this while she was doing the nudy photo shoot.

  9. azcoyote

    She didn’t pose at all aparently.

    Sick of JA? I think not. Just a look at her in the “white bikini of 2005″ is proof perfect that there is a God…

    And he is a man… And he knows how to make a great ass… An he wants to bang hot young chicks like Jessica Alba too…
    Wait. Too far?

  10. UCSD

    #1. Is anyone else sick of Jessica Alba?

    NO. Why would we be sick of a hottie in a bikini? Bring on the Alba.

  11. davina85

    yep i’m damn sick of her. I love how she acts as if she has this serious actress reputation to protect. Earth to Jessica:your only purpose in movies is to show your tits and ass off through pathetic little outfits, that’s never going to change so take the publicity as a gift and attempt to do something productive with your time. You guys may knock angelina but at least she’s out there trying to make a difference instead of bithing and moaning about a publicity shot doing exactly what its supposed to. I say kill jessica and harvest her organs…it would sure serve a better purpose.

  12. azcoyote

    #11 super extreme!

    Harvest away! Dibs on the ass. I think I shall wear it as a hat, as is the custom with all asses of Alba…

  13. blackblackheart

    Jessica Alba does have a mature acting career… Do you people think she’s Lindsay Lohan or something? Even still, Lindsay Lohan is a very successful actress and is good at her trade and if you can’t admit that then you need to grow up =/…

  14. blackblackheart

    (incase you didn’t catch it, my point was that Jessica Alba deserves more respect than Lindsay Lohan, and that even Lindsay Lohan deserves some respect)

  15. popcornsuite

    Any person who is halfway familiar with Playboy knows that not all PB cover girls are nude on the inside pages. And I guess PB made a deal with whoever owned the promotional pictures of Jessica Alba, so I don’t think she has a leg to stand on. Those weren’t her pictures to begin with.

    By the way…

    “Even still, Lindsay Lohan is a very successful actress and is good at her trade and if you can’t admit that then you need to grow up =/…”

    If you mean that she is good at her trade as a teeny bopper, sure. I’ll admit that. But she will NEVER be a serious actress. And I am perfectly grown up, thank you.

  16. Akapee

    Aw, this is too tame!! I wish they had pics of her on the cover squirting, cumming and being cummed on…now that would have been hot.

  17. L.ronhubbard

    Sick of Jessica Alba? The only quibble I have with this site is there aren’t enough stories and naughty photographs of the dear gal. As usual it seems to be the ladies who are doing the complaining.

  18. I agree that it is misleading. When I got this issue, I thought – well! But inside, there’s just one picture of her and some text… that’s it…

    Playboy’s just capitalizing on her current fame…lazy Playboy!

  19. Otto

    I’d let her harvest my organ. And I’ll bet she could act like she liked it…I mean, you know because she’s such a good actress…I don’t mean to imply that she would actually like it. It’s way to big for that. Way to big.

  20. PostAcidYouth

    That’s rich coming from someone who has made a career out of a) posing half naked and pouting and b) playing strippers/women in bikinis. Because god knows she’s not made it on her, er, ‘acting skills’.

    Grow up, Alba. Surely it’s about time she realised people only want her body and nothing else.

  21. happy_bunny

    This kind of thing might not happen to Alba so often if she’d ever put on some clothes and choose some roles that don’t showcase the emotional range of her ass.

  22. Sally

    Correct me if I’m wrong here, but is a teeny-weeny bikini like that not semi-nude anyway? I think Jessica’s hot but sometimes you just gotta know when to keep your mouth shut. Nobody wants to see her half-assed acting, she will never win an Oscar or be taken seriously. I think pretty much all the guys on this web site would probably prefer to see her in a porno (and we all know how much acting that takes)… I don’t know what kind of fantasy world this girl is living in but she is one hell of a hypocrite… You can’t be an actress and try to give off the impression you’re the Virgin Mary. No wonder in some languages there’s only one word for actress/slut… Oh, and the mismatched bikini looks skanky – hate that look (she’d be better off nude hahaha)…

  23. Tania

    This particular story is a little annoying, but I am not sick of Jessica Alba. Yes I am a woman and yes I am jealous of her. If I could somehow cut and paste her entire body onto mine, I’d be a happy, happy girl.

    I have to say that I think she looks much better when her hair is darker and more natural. This whole trying to be blonde thing just makes it look brassy.

  24. PostAcidYouth

    I’m a girl who swings both ways, so to speak, and I don’t find alba hot. Doesn’t mean I’m jealous. Just that there are many people I find hot that aren’t alba. Besides the fact that she’s actually a rather annoying young lady and not a good enough actress to earn my respect, I can’t think of any other reason to like her.

  25. Baroness

    #17, Of course women will do most of the complaining because you guys are content ogling Alba in her skimpy bikini while we demand more. I’m not ‘jealous’, I’m just sick of seeing her so scantily-clad in stripper roles and then bitch about not being taken seriously.

  26. #13,

    If you think that Lindsey Lohan is a sweet girl with a wonderful acting career and we are all just terrible people then I want to know two things from you.
    1. Is Tara Reid underated as an actress and

    2. What the hell are you doing on THIS site?

  27. PostAcidYouth

    I think Baroness hit the nail on the head there

  28. PostAcidYouth

    I think Baroness hit the nail right on the head there.

  29. PostAcidYouth

    So good I had to say it twice. God damn you, superficial, and your cynical ploy to make me look like a windowlicker with a laptop.

  30. NewGuy


    Who’s with me?

  31. PostAcidYouth


  32. billabong021

    I never thought she was that great an actor.
    Its not her poor acting skills its just that she never really made it in a good movie and dark angel (thats it right?) was always just a less fagoty buffy series so that doesnt count.

  33. Siiiigh, #30, NewGuy You’re the same person that was going on and on about this website on two other posts. If it sucks why do you sign on here so much? oh, whats that? No answer? Fine, now leave us alone so we can compare Lindsay Lohans crotch two ground beef thats been left out in the sun for 2 days.

  34. Siiiigh, #30, NewGuy You’re the same person that was going on and on about this website on two other posts. If it sucks why do you sign on here so much? oh, whats that? No answer? Fine, now leave us alone so we can compare Lindsay Lohans crotch two ground beef thats been left out in the sun for 2 days.

  35. Sheva

    I’m just here to give props to for posting that incredible picture of Jessica. Yes, I’m a man and I’ve always dug her. As in all of her. I don’t know her “true” personality and I don’t care since it doesn’t matter here.

    As for Baroness and all the Sarah Jessica hag worshipers, don’t you have some vacuous shopping to do or something?

  36. HelpingOutTheMorons

    I’m sick of this coos. Her acting sucks and her lips look like they’ve done time on Joe Simpson’s swizzle stick.

  37. whackjob

    I subscribe. The issue shows up an I’m all, “yeah…Alba went playboy”. Open it up to find some uninspiring bathing suit pose from who cares.

    Misleading? Yeah. Big deal? eff-no. Litigable? (haha…look it up). Probably not.

    Look at the white bikini shot(s) again. Tired of JA? Are you kiddin me? Long may she rock….at least until she’s an old hag-bag like Lindsay.

  38. BoardBetty

    Jessica Alba is hot, Hot, HOT!!! I’m a chick (mostly hetero) and I’m not complaining. In fact I may need to go take care of some business. More pics of Jessica please.

  39. HollyJ

    I hope she sues his saggy old grey balls off.

  40. #1 – WTF? Sick of Jessica Alba?? That’s crazy talk.

  41. Otto

    I’m a guy (mostly hetro) and I happen to have saggy old grey balls and I’d like to set up a arm wrestling match between #24 (swings) and #38 (mostly) to settle this once and for all. It could be at my place and by “arm wrestling” I mean naked arm wrestling in a vat of jell-o. We’re all adults, so let’s settle this like adults.

  42. Dtbb

    Only 1 thing hotter than J Alba: #38 Talking about J Alba.

  43. LoneWolf

    I haven’t gotten my issue in the mail yet. I hope this silliness doesn’t mean it’s not coming – if there’s a limited distribution it’ll be worth some money one day.

    Lindsay’s desparate to show boobage and Jessica’s threatening suing over implied boobage. Too bad Hef couldn’t have coordinated better and made this thing a win-win.

  44. SumLikeitHoTT

    LOL geez shes got deal with it people
    she didnt pose they just used her picture
    im sure she doesnt get her choice in roles but she takes them as they come & if she making money and having fun well who the fuck r we to complain. Plus she looks damn good

  45. HollyJ

    41/Otto, if you can get swings-both-ways and mostly-hetero to French-tickle your grey saggy ballsac, I’ll bring the digital camera, shoulder-high latex bovine gloves, and plaintains.

  46. L.ronhubbard

    Ummm…unless I’m terribly mistaken this site is still called To be honest I’m not particularly interested in “demanding more” out of pinhead celebrities. I pop in here for a gander because I get a kick out of seeing and hearing these spoiled brats make asses out of themselves. This particular post has elicited an enjoyable joust of commentary but there is a double standard where the men and women are concerned. It seems women are cut all the slack in the world for harboring impossible fantasies for the sensitive Brokeback Mountain lads while men are chastized for drooling over the splendid J.A. or the bodaciously cute Jennifer Love Hewitt. As tempting the prospect of cultivating a Cowpoke-Joycean scholar side of my persona may be, I’ll just take solace in the fact there’ll be a new “Ghost Whisperer” episode on the tube in 48 hours.

  47. i’m really not sick of jessica alba!

  48. Nobody wants her to pose nude anyway, at least not until she works on her body a little bit. She has a lot of work to do, girl can get way hotter with some work.

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