Jessica Alba is an American hero

June 14th, 2007 // 169 Comments

is reporting that Endeavor Talent Agency dropped Paris Hilton because Jessica Alba pushed to have her kicked. An insider reveals:

“They were getting a lot of pressure from bigger clients to get rid of Paris. None of them wanted to have the same agents as Paris; she’s an embarrassment to any real artist. Jessica is the anti-Paris — a real star who hates the silly L.A. party scene that Paris reigns over. She made it clear to the folks at Endeavor — either Paris goes or she goes.”

And if that doesn’t qualify her for greatest woman on the planet, she also says she’s up for one night stands as long as the guy doesn’t stick around the next morning. She tells Cosmopolitan magazine:

“I just wanted to see what it was like to be with different people. I don’t think a girl’s a slut if she enjoys sex. I could have a one-night stand, and I’m the kind of girl who looks over in the morning and is like, ‘Do you really have to be here?’ I don’t need to cuddle and do all that stuff because I know what it is and I don’t try to make it more. I feel like a lot of women try to make it into more, so they don’t feel so bad about just wanting to have sex. I don’t really have a problem with just wanting sex. Never have. Even when I was a virgin and wanted to marry the first guy who I slept with, I never passed any judgments about that. But now I’m done with dating around.”

The word ‘hero’ is thrown around a lot these days, but I think it’s safe to say Jessica Alba is the greatest hero to have ever lived. I once ran into a burning building to save a child and his pet dog, but compared to Jessica Alba I might as well have spent that day beating up kittens.

Photos: Splash
superficial

  1. AJ

    #31

    Honey, if you’re gonna get hotness role models, try to find someone who is actually hot as a role model for hotness. And learn what a nice ass is too. Funny how you being a chick are the only person on here who finds that hot, us guys don’t find that even attractive. Seriously, the only people who compliment this idiot’s average looks are other females these days, no guy does.

  2. Princess Amber

    # 40~ When did she snub the troops. I hate crap like that. Take a minute of out your busy schedule of slutting around and say thank you

  3. Every Black Man

    Cuddle after sex??? What the fuck is that?

  4. No boners for bony

    She was hot years ago, but after burning off her boobs and buns she’s just a pinchy-faced whiny bitch. The top picture doesn’t lie.

  5. gringo

    Eventually Paris will poop out a huge, desiccated, hypercompacted turd (if you thought she was crying on the way back to jail…wait until this thing fissure-pops its way out). And I will shove that thing in Jessica Alba’s mouth. Non-homosexuals everywhere will applaud.

  6. jessica’s a bitch.

    …Michael.

  7. carsten5577

    “I don’t think a girl’s a slut if she enjoys sex.”

    Of course not, that’s a red herring. However, if you sleep around with “different people” YOU ARE A SLUT, Jessica…no ifs ands or buts.

    This uppity little beaner is only marginally more talented than Paris, but Paris’s family has the type of dough the mongrel can only dream about. Jealous c u n t.

  8. carol

    she looks awful on this pic. i think shes just annoying

  9. Sydney Bristol

    I’m starting to think that if I was young, rich, and famous, the only one of these celebusluts I’d hang out with is Nichole Ritchie. At least she’s funny and somewhat realistic. She knows she he has no conventional talent and doesn’t seem to have any of the attitude these other hooers seem to possess.

  10. yukadoozer

    Please. Stop pandering to porn addicted men…this one’s dum as a crum.

  11. woodhorse

    I have to vote that Victor drinking douche water is more attractive that Jimbo and his steamers.

  12. steverino

    I’d have sex with her and then just leave. But only if she did no talking and lots of wincing.

  13. Bob Dole

    I think “Jimbo and The Steamers” was a band that had a hit record back in the 50s. Something like “You Got Me Down in the Dumps”.

  14. woodhorse

    #63 Thank you. It must be “Entertain Woodhorse Day”.

  15. costamar

    In the last pic she’s showing her favorite dick gauge. What a gal!!!

  16. captain obvious

    snotty bitch. I can’t stand this girl. And now the only thing she had going for in the first place (her curvy body) is gone and she is just a stick of a girl. So she should just shut the hell up. Go drool some water out of your mouth, snotbag. I don’t like Paris either, but Alba is no better than her. Its too bad they didn’t drop kick her ass instead. And the cosmo thing was so fake, it was just to try to make her seem like an independent, sexual woman to all those cosmo readers. She probably didn’t even say any of that; just gave the go ahead to use it. I remember how Alba was all abt not doing things because her dad would be upset to see her doing sexual things; now look at her go. She realizes she’s losing public interest so she’s pulling out the old tramp card. Even though we know she’s really a frigid bitch.

  17. dfdfdjkl dfhsdf

    Yes, but for someone not embarrassed to be a slut, she still used the term dating (instead of sleeping) around.

  18. Ren

    Mark-Paul Gosselaar is rep’d by Endeavor. So is J.C. Chasez. And Jennifer Love Hewitt — Alba’s biggest competition since she had Paris axed!

  19. OMG

    Is that herpes sore on her lower lip in Picture 5?

  20. beer

    WOW! I’ve seen people (like Brooke Hogan) wave with

    1. PEACE

    or Richard Dawson does the

    2. I LOVE YOU IN SIGN LANGUAGE

    but check out Jessica Alba! She waves with

    .
    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    3. THE SHOCKER!!!!!
    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    .

    Should that be someone like Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan doing that?

  21. *********************************
    SHOCK IT TO YOU, JALBA THE SLUT!!
    *********************************

    Jessica Alba drops the shocker.
    http://thesuperficial.com/image.php?path=/2007/06/jessica-alba-ff2-premiere-12.jpg

  22. Zeuz

    she’s a slut… and like that

  23. Phazon

    Just another reason to love Jessica Alba.

  24. Hollywood Agent

    Good for her! I hope she and her dildo live happily ever after.

    Just so she knows, no one get dumped from their agency that is making them money.

  25. STFU all of you! YOUR ALL SAYING SHIT ABOUT HER CAUSE YOUR AL UGLY AS FUCK, YOU ONLY HATE THE PEOPLE YOUR JEALOUS OF, LEAVE HER ALL THE FUCK ALONE!!!!! PARIS SUCKS AND JESSICA DOESN’T GO AROUND MAKING SEX TAPES SO Y THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL CALLING HER SLUTS? EXACTLY.

  26. soooo hottt… want to touch the hiny

  27. This chick thinks she’s a real actress … but she’s in movies for her hot ass — I would like her a lot better if she realized that, but she seems to insist on claiming to be the most enlightened person on the planet. Meanwhile she admits being a slut to a magazine and tries to act like it makes her anything more than the hot-assed tartlet that she is …

  28. Deductive Reasoning

    75

    Hmm… Then most guys must be jealous of Rosie O’Donnell because most hate her.

    And Alba must be an ugly fuck because she hates Paris.

    Dumb ass.

  29. Cash ing Alba

    77

    That is why she stopped dating around: her dildo now is the only guy who doesn’t have the balls to tell her the truth.

  30. Confused

    “Even when I was a virgin and wanted to marry the first guy who I slept with.”

    So one is still a virgin after sleeping with a guy?

  31. whitegold

    slut

  32. LEAVEJESSICATOME

    Yeah! STFU all of you! YOUR ALL SAYING SHIT ABOUT HER CAUSE YOUR AL UGLY AS FUCK, YOU ONLY HATE THE PEOPLE YOUR JEALOUS OF, LEAVE HER ALL THE FUCK ALONE!!!!! PARIS SUCKS AND JESSICA DOESN’T GO AROUND MAKING SEX TAPES SO Y THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL CALLING HER SLUTS? EXACTLY.

  33. 82 Needs Meds

    #82 – Dude… Calm down… Is Alba your mom or are you jealous of her haters?

  34. Kris

    Love the example she is setting for women.

    Seriously.

  35. ThatIsGay

    HAHAHAHA

    Look at all you stupid bitches praising Alba’s attention seeking comments. lmao.

    Paris has cemented herself to the point of iconism with the media. And Alba has … posed for Maxim, FHM, and … oh yeah! STUFF!!

    fucking morons.

  36. Is Jessica A Real Brunette?

    Jessica sweetie, sometimes I stay over after sex not because I want to cuddle – I’m just too drunk to drive.

  37. WTF

    WOW, seriously! Everyone says that they hate paris because she is a nasty slut right!!!??? But then you, who I am sure has to change hands to get a new thrill, holds Jessica “boring” Alba on a pedastal for random one night flings with strangers!!!!! Hypocrite in EVERY way possible. Seriously dude…..she ISN’T that hot!! BTW she is encouraging young girls that random one night hook up’s is okay…….once again refer to the “paris treatment” when it comes to sleeping around. This chick will NOT be in HOLLYWOOD in 5 years!!

  38. I count at least 5 snags on that dress.
    Jessica, don’t kill the drapes anymore.

    Drapekill: definition: a dress or unsuccessful clothing) that looks as though it were made out of drapes as in the book “Gone with the Wind”.

  39. Snatch

    So now everyone hates Alba. I can’t say anything, because I hate everyone. But at least Alba doesn’t have herpes. Or is in jail. Or wails for her mommy. Or cries like a little bitch with a skinned knee.
    Although, maybe she does. Who the fuck cares.

  40. guysmiley

    …but she’s canadian. hero to americans, but from canada.

  41. guysmiley

    no she’s not! why’d you tell me she was canadian!

  42. jbird

    At first I was cheering for her when because it seems she was simply trying to bring the hollywood scene for females above the superficial. But when I got to the part of her wanting to sleep around but not be called a slut for it… I wonder what she thinks ‘slut’ means? In every society that has the word (or its equivalent) it means a female who lseeps around with lots of men. Call it unfair all you want, it won’t change the definition of the word and it won’t stop people from saying that you ARE one when you start sleeping around. Just what this country needs – one more person telling young girls it’s OK to go out and risk diseases, unwanted pregnancies, a bad reputation, and possibly messing up the rest of your life by going out and screwing around.

  43. stpdfks

    HIPPO-CRIT Slutty Slutterson!

  44. johnk348

    american hero? more like american zero.

  45. Danklin

    She really DOES hold the key to the greatest treasure in all the land.

    Perfect woman.

  46. Danklin

    #87 i have but one argument for you….Jessica Alba is like a trillion times hotter than Paris could ever hope to be. That makes up for the slutiness.

  47. She’s damned pretty. I can’t deal with one-night-stands though. I’m just not cool enough and I *always* try to make it into something more, even if I absolutely don’t want to. :P To make the whole thing more excusable, less vulgar, I don’t know. But I blame my catholic background and all those guilty and dirty feelings I was raised to feel. Argh!

  48. hollyj

    She’s definitely beautiful in the aesthetic sense…but who wants to go somewhere that a thousand other nobodies went without even trying? It’s like “Fuck my pussy!!! It’s a public urinal at the subway!!”

    What’s so sexy about that?

  49. tonycatman

    #6 you hit the nail on the head. Exactly what I was going to say.

    *********TOO FUCKING SKINNY**********

    I remember when she was perfect. Not so long ago.

    Why to all American celebs seem to think that anorexic is a good look?

  50. shaun

    wow… hottest woman alive says she’s not afraid to sleep around *sigh* maybe 1 day shaun, maybe 1 day…

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