Let’s Talk About Jessica Simpson’s Instagram

Early this morning, Jessica Simpson posted two swimsuit photos of her new skinny body which are way more disturbing than they are sexy because her legs are dying. They’re dead. Even worse, they draw your attention to Jessica Simpson’s Instagram account which is a terrifying shitshow of crazy eyes, duck lips and Eric Johnson’s tongue. It’s almost like she’s trying to make me miss when she was pregnant which she wins because I do. (There’s a basal thermometer in the mail.)

Photos: Instagram