Here’s Jessica Simpson outside a photo shoot (?) yesterday where you can really tell she wore heels her entire pregnancy if not all the way up to the point when she had to carry the kid out of the hospital but then asked if there was some sort of quickie surgery that could do it instead. “This just seems like work that might make me uncomfortable for a minute,” she probably said until a doctor came out and stapled a quesadilla to the baby. “Doctor Jesus,” she’ll later say his name was.
Photos: Pacific Coast News
Ridiculous shoes are ridiculous.
I wonder what sort of carbon nanofibers are used to make the heel on those fuckers. I’m guessing she leaves dents in the sidewalk.
Whoa, the shoes are awesome. Leave the shoes alone!
I don’t like a nude shoe. Maybe because I just don’t like beige.
….i don’t see the problem.
If it was a quesadilla that the doctor stapled to the baby, I have to wonder how Jessica’s pronouncing “Jesus.”
Jeh-suhs
Celebs who look good at 22 then look like shit by 30 should be open to lawsuits for ruining fun memories and causing psychological distress.
Ok, I don’t see it. Am I missing something??
MMMMmmmm, chubby , fat girls are soooooo grateful
She’s hotter this way – I like the curvier Jessica :)
She couldn’t get a free drink in a bar in Wyoming unless she put out in the truck first
Do you mean a tweener , or a BJ , or a hole in one ?
Two Kody Montana’s? One must be a troll…
What’s a tweener and hole in one?
Wyoming? Is that where men are men and the sheep are afraid? I think fat Jessica would do just fine there.
Spreadin them fat legs would take all of the lust right out of it
This would be the greatest thing I have ever seen, if I was a cannibal.
Some pretty sweet hamhocks alright.
That thing would feed a tribe of cannibals for a month.
I wonder if she can see her cooch with that gunt
Pool table lags. Apparently, Jenny Craig did not include these into her “lose weight when you feel like it” contract.
Her Spanish market persona, Gorda Simpson is about to launch.
I bet she kicks like a mule with its balls wrapped in duct tape!
Look like what? Like legs? I don’t even…
Why don’t you get a new lady to bitch about? Calling Jessica Simpson fat got real old, real quick.
“Now that’s a cankle! Where does the calf fat end and the ankle fat begin? Who knows? That’s the fun!”
-President Bill Clinton
Neat, sweet, and…well…somewhat petite! I love her madly.
There is nothing wrong with fat Jessica if she worked 40 hours a week and had to come home and take care of her kid, but she doesn’t.
Those are quite the pillars.
How do those wobbly things support her weight?
Jeepers! Look at the gams on that dizzy dame! She might not skate around like some cheap floosie, but she’s a looker for sure! Myah, shee!!
Why I oughta!
heheheh You’re awesome, Torgs!
Don’t make her angry… you wouldn’t like her when she’s angry.
I keep trying to tell people, THERE WILL BE NO BACON SHORTAGE!!!
I’ve seen a lot worse.
Looks like one of those big turkey drum sticks you see people walking around with at a carnival. Nam-Nam
I had one of those! At the Ren Faire in Annapolis Maryland! It was weird and hard to eat, but it made me say “verily” and “wanton harlot” for the rest of the day.
Huzzah!
heehehehe
So, Mr. Superficial, your parents were conservative and mean, mama beat you up, so therefore you make yourself feel better by making fun of women’s bodies all day long? I’m a woman, and I’m tired of reading this shit on your site. What a shitty world for girls to grow up in. I’m sure you’ve heard it all before, but geez… You seem like a smartish guy, you are reasonably funny. You don’t need to trash women’s appearances constantly to maintain/gain readership. You don’t need to turn phoney nice either. Also, FYI, Clint Eastwood is a douchebag and there is something wrong with Leonardo dicaprios face. Bloat.
I’m going to say “Bloat” when I sign off from now on. :D
‘I’m sure you’ve heard it all before, but geez’
We all have. Innumerable times. And it’s as inane now as it was the first time.
Now, just head off to your Weight Watchers meeting and leave us be.
Marry me!
At first, from a distance, I thought she was barefoot and that the edge of her shoe was actually an intense ankle fat roll.
This picture is just mean. I get it- her legs are fat.
What did you expect from the name of the website? I mean, really. Perhaps you should look up the definition of the word “superficial”, Martha Bloat Bag. If you’re “tired of reading this shit”, then why are you still here? Go eat some potato chips and leave it alone.
Warning! Do not zoom in on that foot.
I thought she was barefoot and on her tip pee toes,then I finally saw the shoe. I do think some people are way to hard on her
I honestly think this is realistic!! My legs look like this and im 5’8 and i weigh 145…these comments above r just rude and malicious even….grow up! only dogs love bones!
she is so short and sooo fat