This Is The Last Time You’ll See Jessica Simpson Looking ‘Fat,’ According To Jessica Simpson

The Superficial / April 10, 2012

Last month, we saw a pregnant Jessica Simpson posing nude for the April issue of Elle which apparently hit newsstands because here she is pimping the issue on Twitter while making the most ridiculous statement she’ll ever make in her life. And, yes, that’s counting the time she asked if the baby can see the TV if she pressed her belly against it really, really hard:

Last chance to see me “fat” aka PREGNANT on the cover of Elle :) I loved this shoot, only on stands for a few more days!!!

Giving Jessica Simpson the benefit of the doubt that, okay, maybe, just maybe, she’s clever enough to make a joke (She’s not.), she’s already planning to get pregnant again. Which is exactly what happens when you take a girl who just wants some Chili’s but can’t because she’s a “pop star” and suddenly put her in a situation where it’s socially acceptable for her to carry baby back ribs in her purse complete with fries and baked beans. Christ, Britney Spears still hasn’t recovered from her pregnancies, yet somehow Weight Watchers thought it’d be worth a $3 million gamble to see if Jessica Simpson can actually turn herself into Jessica Alba after giving birth. They’d have better luck paying me for the same result and I’m not just saying that because of these thin, yet supple hips that practically curve to the touch.

Photo: Elle