Jessica Alba Won’t Do Nudity Because Her Grandparents Might See Her Boobs

May 7th, 2014 // 24 Comments
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In a new interview with Glamour, Jessica Alba crushes the hopes and dreams of anyone still hoping to see her naked in a movie. Or is discreetly encouraging them to murder her grandparents. It could go either way:

Jessica on why she has a nudity clause
“I don’t want my grandparents to see my boobs. That’s it. It would be weird at Christmas. And, I mean, really, if you look at the movies I have done, getting naked would never ‘elevate’ the picture.”

And as she often is on the matters of filmmaking, the star of Spy Kids 4 is right. If there’s one thing that won’t elevate playing a stripper, it’s nudity. That’s a part you play with pants on, or you take the audience right out of the picture. It’s called “authenticity,” people.

Photos: Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News


  1. She’s all wrong for Nancy, but whatever – Miller doesn’t care, and Rodriguez wants to nail her… nothing’s going to change that now.

  2. BlinkyTheFish

    I don’t know – getting them out in Sin City would have been both relevant (she was a stripper, seems stranger not to get them out in that context) and elevated the picture. Actually, getting them out would do nothing BUT elevate whatever she’s in (and here my mind goes blank after listing Sin City).

    • She was OK in The Killer Inside Me (real double entendre if ever I saw one) where she played a hooker. Nudity wouldn’t have “added” to her performance per se, but c’mon – everything’s better with tits.

  3. Cock Dr

    Because it’s ok & normal for Grammie to watch movie sequences of prolonged blood soaked violence (EX: A – Sin City) but should she glimpse female upper body parts that will make quality Alba family time so so awkward.

  4. Tonethius

    Quick, Someone go kill her grandparents,

  5. corpse paint

    i’m okay with this. she’s not the voluptuous dame she was back in the days of Idle Hands and Sin City. i would have given a sack full of seed to see her naked back then…

  6. Jessica Alba Boobs Down Blouse
    Commented on this photo:

    How’s that hi-fiber diet working out for you, Jessica?

  7. AteIsEnough

    How about “Into The Blue”? Tits in that, a little skinny dipping…that would have certainly added to that film’s appeal!!

  8. I’m sure family holidays are awkward enough since even granny and gramps know Jeter gave her the herp.

  9. If only Lena Dunham had delicate grandparents this country would be in much better shape.

  10. Urbanspaceman

    She should get her story straight. It used to be that her dad wouldn’t allow it. Maybe he’s on board for nudity now.

    She should never have been allowed to get away with that Sin City fiasco.

    She’ll bare them someday when no one wants to see.

  11. She only will use them to nab a husband, which she did so that’s all folks.

  12. lovecraft

    The internet already has the “leaked” pictures from her phone and comparisons have proven that the pictures are of her.

  13. Because I’m sure she never breast feeds in front of her grandparents? Just dripping with stupid. And, I’ll wager she does eventually get naked–most female actresses who were against it on principle eventually do as they get older–just want to preserve an image of their body a certain positive way before the decline begins (e.g. Kidman)

  14. Jessica Alba Boobs Down Blouse
    Grandpa Alba
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t worry about us. Whip out the girls for the right role. Or the wrong role.

  15. Mr. Sensitive

    Who cares? The time was before childbirth, as always. Now it would be “hmm…so that’s how they’re trying to fix the deflation these days…”

  16. Well, we’ll always have that time we saw her pubic hair peeking out above the waistband of her low-rise jeans.

    Ha! Of course it was at the Kids’ Choice Awards. Of course it was.

  17. Jessica Alba Boobs Down Blouse
    Commented on this photo:

    She was topless in the movie The Sleeping Dictionary

  18. MWH

    When I saw that trailer for the new Sin City- and she is basically wearing tight pants- I knew she was back to her prudish-hypocritical ways. Guess what honey, you ain’t what it you used to be anyhow, but at least wear a thong and pasties!
    Guess I will vote with my $$-by not seeing your fake movie.

  19. I want to applaud The Superficial for having a shred of integrity with this headline. I’ve read at least three sites today with headlines saying “Will Jessica Alba do Nude Scenes???”…and no, and answer is no.

  20. She’s the type of celebrity that only gets naked on camera 20 years after everybody stopped giving a shit.

  21. Jessica Alba Boobs Down Blouse
    The Mako
    Commented on this photo:

    No role would’ve been elevated by nudity? Yeah, nobody expects a stripper to actually STRIP. Especially not in a place called “Sin City”. What next? They’ll want people playing cowboys to ride horses, and people playing cops to have badges and guns! Hey man, don’t crowd my acting mojo…I’ll just, y’know, ACT like I’m a stripper and people will just get it, without any actual stripping.,,even though I suck as an actress…

    Jessica Biel’s stripper movie may have sucked, but at least her character did her f*cking job!!

  22. Sarah M

    This is interesting since we saw them in the movie, “The Sleeping Dictionary” from 2003.

    So maybe this is a new clause? OR that was a body double?! Hm..

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