Jersey Shore’s Deena Banged A Chick

August 25th, 2011 // 103 Comments

Welcome to the Sex Buffet. Population: Ladies.

While filming in Italy, Jersey Shore’s Deena somehow managed to hook up with a chick The Situation brought home for himself, so I think it’s safe to say these kids are carting home cadavers now. That’s the only explanation here. Via Us Magazine:

Unfortunately for 24-year-old Cortese, her housemates will never let her live it down. “We heard you were moaning all night,” The Situation, 29, teases in a sneak peek from Thursday’s episode.
“She didn’t lick down there,” Cortese says defensively. “She went to and then I decided I didn’t want to do that. Now I realize I was a little bi-curious, and I realized I do like boys.”
“I always said that if I was ever to be bi-curious it would be with a hot blonde,” Cortese says while sitting in confessional with costar Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, 23. “She was adorable.”

Here’s where I’m torn: While it’s hard to believe anyone of any gender wanted to tongue Deena’s slophole – I threw up, too, it’s okay. – I also don’t want to rob myself of the joy of knowing a woman preferred it over having sex with The Situation. Apparently you really can be that big of a douche that a chick will contemplate death by swampgina. The prophecy is true!

Photos: Getty

superficial

  1. Deena Cortese Lesbian Hook Up
    little turtle head
    Commented on this photo:

    HOt!!!

  2. thespiral

    I think you made a typo and meant to write “42-year-old”. If that beat down California Raisin looking ho is 24, I’m the ghost of Bin Laden.

  3. bahlder

    Am I the only one fucking shocked over the fact that she’s 24? What the fuck.

  4. Charlie Hodge

    Gives a whole new meaning to their mantra “Fist Pumping.”

  5. Deena Cortese Lesbian Hook Up
    Xavi
    Commented on this photo:

    WHAT IS THAT COTTAGE CHEESE ON HER LEGS!!
    EPIC EWWWW

  6. slurricane

    Since I’m a good person, and I try to find the good in everyone, I was hoping I could come up with something nice to say. I can’t even lie and say her janky-ass pearl necklace looks good.

  7. Shaquile Jefferson

    I better not catch any Brothers getting their freak on with this !
    Can you imagine what her progeny would look like ?

  8. Lamarr Latrell

    I’d rather start up on necrophilia than this

  9. Laura

    First off, kissing a girl in your bed does not make you bisexual. It’s called being an ATTENTION WH*RE. Deena looks like she would smell like cheese. Just like Angelina. Ugh.

    Second, I will never be able to wrap my head around the fact that PAULY D is 31 years old, and The Situation is 29.

    These aren’t “kids” at the shore. This is not what people in their late 20′s/early 30′s are doing…..they act like they are 20 or 21, living it up on spring break……GROW UP!

  10. Laura

    And speaking of cheese – Deena’s thighs just made me push my lunch to the other side of my desk. Deena…you are on national television. You get 15 minutes of fame. Tone yourself up. I am embarrassed for you.

  11. Joltin' Django

    Imagine what she’s gonna look like in 10 years …

    I don’t think I’m gonna be able to sleep tonight trying to get THAT image out of my head (I wish I hadn’t said it).

  12. Lucy

    24???? Ick. She looks 54 and she’s hideous from the top of her head to her big toe.

  13. Deena Cortese Lesbian Hook Up
    Lucy
    Commented on this photo:

    Nasty. She needs a long hot shower and to lose about 30 pounds.

Leave A Comment