MTV Cancelled ‘Jersey Shore’
You might say they jet-packed the shark. — I’ll go kill myself now.
Speaking of New Jersey being the pride of America, MTV has finally decided to pull the plug on Jersey Shore which is really the only acceptable response to one of these kids successfully reproducing that doesn’t involve a shotgun and an outhouse like in all those letters I wrote them. MTV News reports:
On Thursday (August 30), MTV announced that the upcoming sixth season of “Jersey Shore” will be its last. [A bunch of promotional horseshit I’m not reposting here.]
When reached for comment, MTV said, “In this post-Honey Boo Boo world, Jersey Shore suddenly found itself becoming an exemplar of poise and etiquette which flies in the very face of the reason we created this show in the first place. That reason of course being making a bunch of Italian and/or Italian-looking kids get AIDS at the beach while a midget shits in their house. It was our News Night 2.0, and they ruined it!”