Jerry Sandusky Was Teaching Those Boys How To Shower, You Guys

December 16th, 2011 // 54 Comments
Jerry Sandusky
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Jerry Sandusky‘s current lawyer has already done everything wrong from letting his client do horribly incriminating interviews to waiving a preliminary hearing, that Carlisle, Pa. attorney Karl Rominger had to join the defense to get things back in order. Except Karl Rominger is also a right wing, gun nut AM radio personality, so of course he managed to walk right onto the case and make everything that transpired before him look like a goddamn Mensa convention. Here he is telling abc27 News that Jerry Sandusky was simply teaching those poor boys how to shower which he’s now attempting to walk back as a “hypothetical” scenario after literally every single person who heard it went “Jesus fucking Christ.” That includes the Pope who couldn’t be happier with this. “Yes, yes, look ata the footballa team. Pizza pie-a!” (German pope, I know.)

“Some of these kids don’t have basic hygiene skills,” attorney Karl Rominger said. “Teaching a person to shower at the age of 12 or 14 sounds strange to some people, but people who work with troubled youth will tell you there are a lot of juvenile delinquents and people who are dependent who have to be taught basic life skills like how to put soap on their body.”

Yes, and Michael Jackson was simply using Jesus Juice to teach kids how to take Communion. In the meantime, the defense is planning on attacking Mike McQueary‘s credibility which shouldn’t be too hard considering his story changes almost daily to save face because it’s now gone from he did stop the rape to just kidding, he didn’t actually see any rape to fall on his sword to protect Joe Paterno which is where it landed this morning when McQueary testified in court. Via SI.com:

McQueary said he saw Sandusky was behind a boy he estimated to be 10 or 12 years old, with his hands wrapped around the boy’s waist. He said the boy was facing a wall, with his hands on it.
He said he peeked into the shower several times and that the last time he looked in, Sandusky and the boy had separated. He said he didn’t say anything, but “I know they saw me. They looked directly in my eye, both of them.”
McQueary said he reported what he saw to coach Joe Paterno.
He said he did not give Paterno explicit details of what he believed he’d seen, saying he wouldn’t have used terms like sodomy or anal intercourse out of respect for the longtime coach.

So let me get this straight: Going by the latest testimony, Mike McQueary didn’t have the moral fortitude to stop a man from raping a small boy, but he made sure not to talk about butt sex out of respect for Joe Paterno’s sensibilities? C’mon. “Sure, maybe in hindsight, explaining things in detail would’ve stopped more kids from getting raped, but Coach doesn’t allow sex talk. Especially before a big game. Ha, no sir.”

Photo: Getty

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  1. Evil Dick Tater

    He made the kids refer to him as Peter Rabbit, because of his rabbit teeth and uh, his peter…

  2. JC

    It all makes sense–I mean, what was he supposed to do, just give the kids a loofa and walk away? Better to use his penis instead.

    • Artofwar

      ….Funny, yet wrong all at the same time—like watching a little old lady get hit by a well moving bus. It’s not the actual contact that is funny—but the look on her face when she hit the concrete….Artofwar

      • Artofwar

        I’m a goddam idiot moron who signs all my comments with my goddam idiot moron screen name….Artofwar

  3. Roberta

    This is the most vile and disgusting thing. Hope they all ROT.

  4. Johnny P!

    Sandusky Lawyer: When they were separated and staring at you, were there traces of feces on Mr. Sandusky’s erection?
    McQueary: I, uh… I didn’t really feel comfortable looking at an old man’s genitals
    Sandusky Lawyer: I repeat… did you or did you not see poop on my client’s boner!?! Answer the question!
    McQueary: Well, uhhh.. I’d have to say no but–
    Sandusky’s Lawyer: No further questions! So you see, ladies and gentlemen of the jury: ‘If the dick’s not in shit you must acquit!”
    (hey, it worked for O.J.)

  5. “You see kid? To get it clean you have to…. REALLY….GET….IN….THERE”

  6. Alex

    Even if he goes to the most white-collar prison, he’ll get his. I assure you.

  7. Jimbo

    I guess he was teaching them what happens when you drop the soap in the show too.

  8. Frank Burns

    Sometimes football coaches don’t have a basic understanding of what it is like to be shot in the testicles by a 12-gauge Browning BPS. Maybe someone can clarify that for Coach Sandusky. Mike McQueary can watch, to work on his observations skills, being sure to blink when the trigger is pulled, and out of respect for Joe ‘see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil’ Paterno, he can refer to it all as ‘boom boom to the naughty parts’.

  9. Venom

    You know you hear people in America talking about how badass they are and how many guns they have and all the other bullshit, but when it comes down to it nothing happens. You would think someone would have put a bullet in the brains of Casey Anthony and this guy, but no, they are walking around with not even an egg thrown at them. Even Madoff only had someone yell at him and push him once.

    How could you be a parent and know what this man did to your child and not Dexter him?

    • Cock Dr

      Like many molestors he picked vulnerable kids, kids who didn’t have anyone to take a up a shotgun against smiling ass bandits.
      Plus, you know,everyone was apparently always thinking of “the team”.
      And by “the team” what is really meant is lots and lots and lots of incoming $$ for the school.

    • V

      only cowards need guns. that’s why america loves guns.

      • Schmidtler

        So all cops, every member of the marine corps, every member of the armed forces, and all the guys in Seal Team Six are cowards? Yeah. Only cowards need the anonymity of the internet to make such jackassey assertions.

      • Dan

        No guns, are just tools. They don’t make a person anything.

        Also, I wouldn’t have needed a gun to take care of Sandusky. I could have easily driven over him in my truck.

    • Victim number 6′s mom did report him to the campus police, when her som came home with wet hair from a no-doubt instructional shower session with Sandusky – and we all know how well that went. When she tried to extract a promise from him not to do it again (with the cops eavesdropping) Sandusky refused.

      There’s a reason why a predator like Sandusky attaches himself to a charity like Second Mile – the kids involved were already marginalized and at-risk, and either came from severely dysfunctional families or hadparents that were MIA and/or neglectful. Forget about being a caring parent, you at least have to be an aware and functioning one to realize something’s going wrong with your kid other than the problems he (and you) already have – and if you have that going on, chances are your kid isn’t gonna be involved in this sort of charity in the first place. The relationship Sandusky crafted with his victims, where he was probably the most important and influential force in their lives, meant the victims wouldn’t have come to their parents on their own.

  10. Wootang

    So, did he back away from his “rhythmic slapping” sound testimony? I thought that was the most disturbing detail.

  11. Now we know why McQueary called his dad. “You never taught me how to shower! *sob*”

  12. wind up bird

    I’m not shocked by this at all. The fact is that people pull this shit during rape trials all the time.

    The fact is that on one wants to confront rape and molestation statistics. There’s a reason they teach women to yell “fire” instead of rape. People willingly turn a blind eye at every turn.

    I doubt this about paterno . I think the ginger wants out of the fact that he saw a kid got raped and all he did was run.

  13. CD

    There is a good use for perverts like this, bury him waist deep and teach kids to perfect their T-Ball swing using this bastards head. But sadly, he won’t spend a second in prison, he will get away with this. It’s sort of like when you’re in high school and the jocks, who literally have the intelligence of a brick, somehow pass all of their classes and manage to graduate, only on a much more severe scale of course.

  14. Kirk Cameron's Abortion Doctor

    I’m glad this stuff is coming out. Everyone needs to see what a depraved sh*thole Penn State is.

  15. Schmidtler

    I hope Sandusky’s wife ends up being charges as well. I can’t see how it is possible he was raping kids in their home and she didn’t know about it. The DA needs to file charges against the wife, get her locked up with no bail pending trial, and then see how she starts squealing. Turn the heat up on these perverts and the truth will come out.

  16. Xenophobiac

    C’mon. “Sure, maybe in hindsight, explaining things in detail would’ve stopped more kids from getting raped, but Coach doesn’t allow sex talk. Especially before a big game. Ha, no sir.”

    he was talking about Sandusky being the longtime coach not Paterno.

    Sandusky is scum but I felt the need to correct your assumption.

    • sooky

      No he wasn’t check the Sports Illustrated article. He was referring to Paterno. In any event, who is that fd up that they don’t go he was raping a kid? You go to Penn State, and you can’t find language to express yourself as a graduate student? Wow, application process must be difficult. Any adult with 2 ounces of sense and morals would have said what it was unless they didn’t want to say it. Bottom line, this loser didn’t want to be in a messy situation or upset Paterno. Upset Paterno, who gives a shit about the kids?

  17. Jerry Sandusky
    Jerry Fondlebois
    Commented on this photo:

    Come here little fella. I gotta big ‘ol lollypop for you. Just reach into my pants…

  18. catapostrophe

    Jerry Sandusky is one of my favorite celebrities. Thanks for covering his fascinating story, “Fish”!

  19. JK

    Yeah it’s always the ‘right’ wing nutjob, grow up dude, both sides have their psychos and this isn’t a political blog either. Perhaps time to use the HuffPost?

  20. Kevin

    Is it just me or does this guy look like a Catholic priest?

  21. Jerry Sandusky
    Soft Taco Juice
    Commented on this photo:

    Honestly I hope Sandusky dies with about 50 gallons of convicted fellons’ semen up his ass.

    That said he might just have the absolute worst legal defense team in the history of legal defense teams.

  22. mean tina

    The only answer is to castrate all these assholes without any sedation. In public.
    Signed,
    Society

  23. Lynn

    Even his face makes me want to vomit. Then afterwards I would make him eat the vomit.

  24. Chris

    Just think of it as a flesh colored Q-tip Billy.

  25. Fred

    How bout we just sentence every adult who’s personally acquainted with Jerry Sandusky to death?

  26. Randall

    We need to just forget about the whole thing and put it behind us. People need to learn to forgive.

  27. hbw

    That wasn’t soap he was putting on that kid.

  28. Moke

    I wanna teach Miranda Kerr how to shower.

  29. forrest gump

    believe it or not: MINISTERS HAVE A PENIS TOO.

  30. Weirdo

    Somebody ought to use your head as a piñata.

  31. Jack o' Lantern

    Its Jerry’s part andhe can soap it up and wash it back and forth with his hand as fast as he wants to

  32. Jack o' Lantern

    Jerry does sound like a filthy rotten pervert but we are dealing with hearsay on McQueary’s part which does not mean its not true but its not definitive like being an actual victim or photos ,cams. or movies of the event.So we have to rely on those victims to come forward. Ane even if they do the question is why did they wait so long to confess victimization? Jerry may beat the rap

  33. Jack o' Lantern

    Paterno was a great coach and all of these sex abuse stories about another guy being the abuser unrelated to Paterno’s coaching strategy should not tarnish Paterno’s character in our memory.He also should sue for being fired .He deserves millions!!

  34. Prosecution

    McQueary is a credible witness, even if his stories aren’t an exact match. He had no axe to grind with Sandusky – no reason to make any of this up. As a former prosecutor, it’s really not that difficult to tell who is lying and who is telling the truth. Sandusky’s 2 attorneys are idiots (yeah, he was teaching them “hygiene” – if a jury buys that defense, I’m moving in with Sarah Palin) – amendola impregnated his 17 year old client. Once the parade of victims testify along with McQueary, Sandusky will end up in his rightful place – prison

  35. Jerry Sandusky
    BAHAH
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously, people like him need to get shot in the face 10 times. People like him don’t deserve to breathe.

  36. Sandusky thinks hes a black celebrity or something. His bs does not fly as white people accused of molesting kids dont get out of it innocent or not. Give him credit for trying though.

    I wonder if a Sandusky Sausage goes good with Jesus Juice.

    Jerry is going to prison and will die there soon after. He will find out what it is like to be raped and Penn State will pay out money that makes the payout Duke gave those Lacrosse kids seem like cab fare.

  37. he not only taught them how to shower, he taught them where they can hide an old creep’s pecker.
    twisted old freak.

  38. SFRowGuy

    Can I get Jason Statham to teach me how to shower?

  39. richard perkins jr

    Dear Everybody,

    I do not know how to shower properly. would you please send me your gay autistic grandpa so he can show me how to properly soap up my bottom and clean out my large intestines with man juice.

    Regards,

    Jerry Sandusky’s a dead man walking

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