Jennifer Lopez’s kids will soil only the finest of items

January 21st, 2008 // 93 Comments

Jennifer Lopez had her baby shower over the weekend on the rooftop of the Gramercy Park Hotel. J-Lo’s unborn children, she’s rumored to be having twins, will be getting lots of insanely expensive gifts for them to poop on, according to NY Daily News:

Lopez and her hubby are dropping at least $40,000 a pop on nurseries at their estates in Bel Air, Calif., Fisher Island, Fla., and Oyster Bay, L.I.
The Daily News reported last month that her gift registry at Petit Tresor, an exclusive L.A. boutique, included a Balmoral black carriage for $3,495, a $560 jogging stroller and two $349 cashmere outfits – one with pink stripes and one with blue.

Since Jennifer Lopez’s children will be half-human, half-vampire does that mean they can walk around in the daytime? More importantly, are jogging pants really an acceptable form of clothing with Marc Anthony’s outfit? I mean, sometimes you reach a point where you’re being too classy.

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. holla@meh

    first? maybe?

  2. holla@meh

    …and what the FUCK is he wearing!?
    he should probably go jump off the highest bridge he can find in that outfit.

  3. Scientologist for you

    This woman needs clearing desperately. Through the grace of Hubbard I have posted nearly the top, proving the rigors of scientology lead to a healthy life!

  4. Puritan Assmilk

    what a strange little chihuahua man and bizarre large pomeranian woman

    oh, and *not* FRIST!! (why do you morons care anyway?)

  5. Uncle Eccoli

    Fuck that nasty bitch.

  6. LadyJane

    I wonder if I can have that coat after she squirts out the spawn. I’ma going campin’ this summer and I need me a new tent.

  7. Fetus in a thong

    Her angelic face torn by glass and roofing nails, she breathes heroically, making her point. This 5 month preemie aint goin’ nowhere and she is gonna live by God! She lets out an inaudible chirp as more garbage is piled upon her torn skull. She falls down the heap and lands in a little gully where a worker steps on her. She screams in almost silence. The man turns to see where the apparent frog is and sees nothing. Fortunately our gal lay in mud and save for a few cracked tiny ribs, she is ok. By the graces she is ok!!!!!

    By a miracle our nude seductress is blanketed by some old disgarded piece of yarn that ends up wound about her micro genitals and teeny buttocks. She looks like an ultra modern super model now! Lean, rustically fashionable, and sassy, she gasps as the rain pours into her open gasping mouth. She is going to have a tough day ahead of her.

    OUR little girl.

  8. WhoCares

    Omg what is she wearing? And i’m still trying to figure out how she was able to screw that ugly ugly man to make a baby..

  9. Who is the father?

  10. What is she wearing? awful!
    Find some interesting pictures in my blog: http://www.spymac.com/marcelo7300

  11. WhoCares

    Oh and hes pretending to be the man that stands outside of a hotel and opens doors for people.. Thats funny,, what a little man thing,

  12. Andrew

    Nice to see Mr Anthony wearing sporty Vampire Clothing …

    For Anthony wearing vampire clothing isn’t a costume choice…

    it’s a Lifestyle!

  13. i dont really care about her spending habits.. but go to my website for UFC 80 videos FREE http://mixedmartialartvideos.com

  14. Halle's Berry

    she looks like an ostrich…huge poofy black midsection, strange neck, and two tiny legs jutting out at odd angles…someone keep her away from sewers and other holes in the ground!

  15. BaldAsBritney

    J LO is the reason the terrorists hate us.

  16. The Office Whore

    Terrible coat~ mama’s got a squeeze box..

    cute shoes though..

  17. duckduck

    Ack, he looks awful. What’s with that outfit?
    Their kids will grow up to be 3 feet tall.

  18. Do you think her dirt path is a highway?

  19. Hey Jimbo, I would not mind taking a drive down that dirt path.

  20. my comment

    Teetering in-vitro twins in the winter on 8 inch black patent leather t-strap platform shoes from 42nd Street. That’s classy.

  21. OT-VII

    no pregnant woman should ever wear platform shoes!! one fall, and it’s miscarriage city…which maybe would be a money-saver for the attendants at the baby shower, jeez a 4k stroller?

  22. Hey Mike. Your sheep worn out or what?

    We all know you would prefer the male dirt road.

  23. Ted from LA

    She’s just Jenny from the block. He’s a blockhead. I wouldn’t wear that outfit to a knife fight.

  24. Hey Mike. Your sheep worn out or what?

    We all know you would prefer the male dirt road.

  25. Hey Mike. Your sheep worn out or what?

    We all know you would prefer the male dirt road.

  26. Hey Mike. Your sheep worn out or what?

    We all know you would prefer the male dirt road.

  27. Hey Mike. Your sheep worn out or what?

    We all know you would prefer the male dirt road.

  28. Hey Mike. Your sheep worn out or what?

    We all know you would prefer the male dirt road.

  29. Hey Mike. Your sheep worn out or what?

    We all know you would prefer the male dirt road.

  30. Hey Mike. Your sheep worn out or what?

    We all know you would prefer the male dirt road.

  31. Lowlands

    Jennifer Lopez looks like an umbrella to me.But Marc Anthony didn’t look this good since?Unfortunally i can’t remember since when.The fine coat makes the fine gentleman,that must be the cause ofcourse(:

  32. Jimbo, I thought your ass was a little fuzzier than normal. Did you forget to wax?

  33. Oprah's Gorilla Butthole

    hey Jimbo, WTF? I know pressing the “enter” key is fun and all, but you’re not witty enough to have 8 consecutive entries

  34. @33 That is my anal dwelling butt monkey troll. It gets all exicted when it pushes a button. It thinks it is getting a treat by pushing a button..

  35. fo'sgirl

    She’s been street-walkin for years…i’m sure she’ll be alright in those shoes.. she just has to be careful not to step on Marc Anthony….

  36. em

    she’s having a girl or girls. she is only pregnant in the stomach really. and also, she HAS to way more than skeletor.

  37. Sauron

    I’m wondering where the button is to open her up.Must be somewhere underneath…

  38. Ript1&0

    I like Marc Anthony, he seems like an extremely concerned and doting husband.

    Who can never ever look as good as JLo. Even though it’s physically impossible, I think we should shove him into some track pants just to reiterate. No one can be as pretty as our diva!

  39. MoronicShitney

    He is one ugly midget fucker.

  40. grrr

    what is he a size zero
    eat for god sakes

  41. sandra

    Wow, she is huge… she has no neck, just a large round head.

  42. sandra

    Wow, she is huge… she has no neck, just a large round head.

  43. sandra

    I am surprised she is not make\ing that stupid face with her mouth half open for the camera. Stupic shoes to wear for someone that big.

  44. D. Richards

    Marc Anthony’s jogging pants! That’s rich, Ficial.

    Yeah, Jenny-J-Lo-Lopez-Selena really is just ‘Jenny from da’ block’. Everybody can relate to Jennifer Lopez.

  45. haha

    wow, people are being pretty hateful for such a neutral, blah-esque story… i love those shoes.

  46. fergernauster

    Buffoons.

    She must crush his bird-ass in bed.

  47. KickRocks

    Black, navy and grey?

    No, no and NO!

  48. edamame

    He has NO signs of a package, whatsoever!
    EVERYTHING will be hanging Lo on J. after giving birth to twins.
    Hope the babies don’t look like Gollum, cuz Marc is one ugly mutherfucker.
    They should get friendly with Christina and Jordan Bratman, then their kids would
    have a shot at being the cutest in the playgroup.

  49. He looks like a waiter with a breakdancing gig after work. She looks like she’s has about 30 chuletas too many.

  50. EuroNeckPain

    I am allergic to this man’s looks
    Because he reminds me of a former boss I had long ago
    He posed for the local newspaper with arms crossed, picture taken from underneath, to look like the master of the world

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