Jennifer Lopez in a bikini

August 4th, 2009 // 197 Comments

Here’s Jennifer Lopez vacationing in Italy this week and Jesus Christ! I feel like I’m staring directly into the Death Star. I’m not saying that thing can destroy whole planets, but I am saying a small rebel fleet could fly through that crack. No, really, George Lucas just stopped raping my childhood to approve this message:

[Insert CGI Indiana Jones revealing he's Jar Jar Binks here.] – G.L.

Ha! Good one, George. (I’m going to murder your face.)

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. Darth Pants

    I could eat that for days.

  2. C3M

    I have to say for a girl with such a booty she’s sure lucky to have no visible cellulite!

  3. pimppi alanius

    It’s a TRAP!

  4. Sure

    Dickwads that blog:

    “Of course, that’s just my opinion. I could be wrong.”

    They are wrong, and they know it, BEFORE they hit the “post comment” tab. That’s what make them dickwads. Both jlo and urinal cake K, both have huge unattractive rhino rear ends. Just click on pic # 4 above, then hit full size. You will lose your lunch.

  5. sure

    Dickwads that blog:

    “Of course, that’s just my opinion. I could be wrong.”

    They are wrong, and they know it, BEFORE they hit the “post comment” tab. That’s what make them dickwads. Both jlo and urinal cake K, both have huge unattractive rhino rear ends. Just click on pic # 4 above, then hit full size. You will lose your lunch.

  6. friendlyfires

    s t r e t c h m a r k s!!!

  7. jesus

    I bet she drops massive shits

  8. april hernandez

    there is always room for Jell-Lo

  9. Fati

    OH SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! This coming from a bunch of ugly obese Americans! Where did you get used to fit hot women, huh?! I will bet that none of you or your wives look half as good as she does! You stinking fat Mcdonalds obsessed morons!

  10. laura

    lest we not forget this woman is 40 years old.

  11. Vandal

    Fuck me! I bet that takes some wiping.

  12. Lippen Whiskey

    How long since she was in “Anaconda”? I can’t believe that it has taken all this time for a pair of shots like this to finally show up. What of the harm to 3D modelers the world over seeking to make their J-Lo babes? What of the harm to sculptors needing the booty reference? What of artists the world over needing the booty beauty fix? And now we get them in like, video shots. Well, about time. But long past time. Not past prime though. : ) She still looks great and no fake boobs.

  13. Can you make some articles be nice without sexy pictures… I think that not good to saw… More useful articles will help reader for leave useful comment to share…
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  14. The beauty gets plump, I wanna recommend her a fat guys dating website http://www.plusflirt.com maybe you can find Jennifer there.

  15. Jake

    She’s one beautiful fox and her ass is just perfect! Round and big booty. I’d like to have her from behind any day!

  16. Jake

    She’s one beautiful fox and her ass is just perfect! Round and big booty. I’d like to have her from behind any day!

  17. lucyk51

    I found a great dating site_____W e a l t h y D a t e r. c0m_____. .where you have the opportunity dreaming about dating a millionaire and make it true! u dont have to be a millionaire.but u can meet one. I thought everyone needed to meet some miracle after all the terrible stuff in the news and the economy .———————————————–

  18. lucyk51

    I found a great dating site_____W e a l t h y D a t e r. c0m_____. .where you have the opportunity dreaming about dating a millionaire and make it true! u dont have to be a millionaire.but u can meet one. I thought everyone needed to meet some miracle after all the terrible stuff in the news and the economy .———————————————–

  19. lucyk51

    ————————————She looks delicious!! love her

    very much. I saw her at dating site____W e a l t h y D a t e r .

    c0m____ last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is

    looking for on that site.(^_^)(^_^)*********************(^_^)

  20. lucyk51

    ————————————She looks delicious!! love her

    very much. I saw her at dating site____W e a l t h y D a t e r .

    c0m____ last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is

    looking for on that site.(^_^)(^_^)*********************(^_^)

  21. bill kills_47

    There should be a superficial.com convention where all the pathetic posters comparing the bodies of GFs/wives/their own with celebs’, and retarted trailer park goodies who can’t be funny without racial/ sexist insults can get together..AND get GASSED with Zyklon B. That would put a smile on orphans’ face.

  22. Damn… one smack from behind and I wouldn’t have to move at all… the ripple effect would literally take care of the pumping for me…

  23. JLo

    *brrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaappppppp*

    Oh dear. A few too many tacos, I guess…

  24. SMDH

    Okay..I know this site caters to Caucasians, but seriously, all the hate is so unnecessary. You people praise these disgusting, sick looking puppy size two, unfeminine anorexic girls, and spruill such hate to anyone who ways over 100 lbs.
    Seriously, have you ever thought they you may fuel the fire of these girls such as Mihca Barton, Paris Hilton, Linsey Lohan and the likes (because they all look alike)? It is so sad to read all the post, and it starts at the top, the writer for this so called blog, I wish you well, because all the negative energy you put out is incredible. When the universe sends it back, I’ll stop there.
    Jennifer may not be the best singer, but she certainly can dance, and she isn’t a bad actor, you people can’t handle women with pigment in their skin, who may or may not speak like you, or look like you, or behave as you do, and what is the behavior of many of you who have decided to unleash you inner demons, and insecurities–baphoonery!
    Anytime a woman of color is featured on this site, she’s fat, or how features don’t resemble that of an wood pecker, if her hair isn’t stringy, then you have a problem It’s ironic that you people tan for darker skin, (because let’s face it, black/brown is beautiful, and it goes with everything) are getting butt implants faster than Joan Rivers can get more plastic surgery, and injecting your lips to make them appear bigger, all the while looking like clowns, pulling your skin back like fools trying to remain youthful (pitiful), all the while admiring the fact that black and brown doesn’t crack, face it, your lame attempt to make people of color feel less than failed, and urge you to find the good person, depth within your twisted hearts, and get over the fact that there is beautiful in every ethnicity, including your own-although the comments that I have read make me believe that somehow you all are just as ugly on the inside as you are on the outside-Sad, just sad!!

  25. Let's Try This Again

    Jennifer Lopez is a narcissist with very limited talent, with an army of “her people” who promote her constantly as glamorous and “multi-talented”. Meanwhile she’s well known for being a diva bitch to “underlings” who are only trying to make her fat ass successful.

    So when there are pictures of her looking like she’s lugging around king size Sealy Posturepedic Pillow inside a pitifully overmatched red bikini, at this web site we enjoy making fun of her. As Martha says, it’s a good thing.

  26. SMDH

    Okay..I know this site caters to Caucasians, but seriously, all the hate is so unnecessary. You people praise these disgusting, sick looking puppy size two, unfeminine anorexic girls, and spruill such hate to anyone who ways over 100 lbs.
    Seriously, have you ever thought they you may fuel the fire of these girls such as Mihca Barton, Paris Hilton, Linsey Lohan and the likes (because they all look alike)? It is so sad to read all the post, and it starts at the top, the writer for this so called blog, I wish you well, because all the negative energy you put out is incredible. When the universe sends it back, I’ll stop there.
    Jennifer may not be the best singer, but she certainly can dance, and she isn’t a bad actor, you people can’t handle women with pigment in their skin, who may or may not speak like you, or look like you, or behave as you do, and what is the behavior of many of you who have decided to unleash you inner demons, and insecurities–baphoonery!
    Anytime a woman of color is featured on this site, she’s fat, or how features don’t resemble that of an wood pecker, if her hair isn’t stringy, then you have a problem It’s ironic that you people tan for darker skin, (because let’s face it, black/brown is beautiful, and it goes with everything) are getting butt implants faster than Joan Rivers can get more plastic surgery, and injecting your lips to make them appear bigger, all the while looking like clowns, pulling your skin back like fools trying to remain youthful (pitiful), all the while admiring the fact that black and brown doesn’t crack, face it, your lame attempt to make people of color feel less than failed, and urge you to find the good person, depth within your twisted hearts, and get over the fact that there is beautiful in every ethnicity, including your own-although the comments that I have read make me believe that somehow you all are just as ugly on the inside as you are on the outside-Sad, just sad!!

    By the way, the tradional round, larger behinds is exactly the look that your men craved, and still do, even if they don’t admit, they just do know it, and as stated earlier, is exactly the look your striving for, what’s the problem?

    Jennifer do your thing, and so will the rest of us nice, round, big juices ass girls!

  27. The Observer

    I love when people whine and complain about white people being racist while being completely racist against white people at the same friggin’ time. Go look up words like self-righteous, hypocrisy and double-standard in the dictionary SMDH.

    White people have tastes like anyone else. Those tastes usually don’t include cottage cheese. Either learn to deal, or keep your mouth shut and your fingers still.

  28. It looks like a caricature of the real thing….

  29. #124 & 126 – I’d like to secretly switch your coffee with Sanka…

  30. Phil

    I’d push my face into that ass, roll it around and make sounds like a motorboat.

  31. Deacon Jones

    @126

    Du’oh! You were the Puerto Rican chick that got kicked off of “More to Love” last night right???

  32. Careful

    130. Hope she eats a burrito that day.

  33. Could her butt be injected into Marc Anthonys face?

  34. Pablito

    J-Lo has a big ass and small boobs. Who knew?

  35. Phillynate

    Anybody else thinkin what I’m thinkin? Marc Anthonys is like 5’6. A penis on a guy that size is like 4″ max. There’s too much ass in the way! Bet he can’t even get it in there! Would be hilarious to watch!!! Hahahahaha! Look at little Anthony try, try as he might. “I think I can, I think I can, I think I….nope. It’s physics. I can sing really well though…”

  36. #131 – HAHAHAHAHA… I was watching that cattle herd yesterday too. Great television.

  37. Phillynate

    Anybody else thinking what I am thinking? How does 5’6 Marc Anthony, with prob a 4″ penis actually get up in that monster? He couldnt reach if he wanted to! “I think I can, I think I can….Wait. Shit. Too short….I can sing really well though…I’ve been told it’s better than sex anyways…By my Madre atleast”

  38. Wizard

    GROSSSSSS
    Whoever thinks this is in any way sexually appealing needs to get to a shrink ASAP.
    Puerto Ricans have a whole different set of “hotness” standards than the rest of us. That is disgusting.

  39. Fas(c)hionista

    You can see her penis shadow on her thigh in pic #5. Must be 3PM.

  40. m.

    Well good sirs, i for one bow in front of the Great Donkey.
    She looks hot, it s all natural and non off that photoshop sh*t.

  41. Black is Evil

    Negroes are silly creatures. You say you age well and yet, you don’t live long. You get nasty black bumps on your faces and your hearts are weak. You kill each other here AND in Africa. You cut the clits off of young women. Is that the white man’s fault?

    JLO(life) is a fat ass pig. No talent. She was ok looking if you were into mixed race hispanic/black chicks. But now, she is getting old and her body looks beat. I am not saying most of us would turn her down, hell, men will fuck anything. I am saything that she is ugly compared to the average white celebrity. AND but is nasty and I bet when she wipes she frequently misses parts of her ass. Poor Mark most likely occasionally ingests some of her feces when he goes down on her.

  42. Robert can you hear me?

    Why do you have to pull out your race card? Put it away.

  43. gotmilk?

    38, wrong, look at picture 4. where the sun light hits her ass cheek, there seems to be plenty of it. let’s hope for every else, that no lighting ever hits the rest of that without some extreme airbrushing.

    how does her ass not eat the back of that bathing suit?

  44. Name no

    I want to know if she can get it going in the rump shakin way..Does it hurt her back?

  45. Shannon

    Damn, those are really unflattering bikini bottoms!

  46. Tinner

    All you people are weird to me: if I had a wife that looked like J.Lo I would be very pleased with myself (and her bottom and those wonderfully sized tits).

  47. ashley

    Wow, that is impressive! – shortpeopledate.com

  48. Bubba Rednex

    That ass must make bowl filling sidewinders . J lo screams ” Get me a Plunger ”

  49. izzycat

    There should be a ‘glute-off’ between JLo and KimK. It would be ass-tastic! Who would win?

  50. just

    Jesus she was literally the hottest thing there was but age, and lack of instant photoshop out on the open sea, have not been kind.

    I remember when men would lay their lives down just to get close to a single buttock cheek.

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