Jennifer Lopez to star in her own reality show

April 24th, 2008 // 67 Comments

After giving birth to twins, Jennifer Lopez has obviously lost the will to live. What’s basically the equivalent of laying down and dying, J-Lo has agreed to star in a new reality show for TLC. People reports:

The singer and new mom to twins will co-executive produce, co-create and star in the “docu-series,” which focuses on how Lopez juggles her career — including launching a new fragrance — with motherhood.
“I’m looking forward to sharing this exciting journey together,” said Lopez.
“Jennifer is unbelievably passionate about life and will be an incredible role model for our audience,” TLC President, Angela Shapiro-Mathes said in a statement.

While I don’t believe many moms can follow in J-Lo’s footsteps and launch a fragrance line out of their mansion, this show has all kinds of potential. If they reveal the room where Marc Anthony hides his tortilla spaceship, I’m freaking there. Ten bucks says it’s fueled by guacamole. Who’s in? Bill, c’mon, don’t be afraid of some action. You have a gambling addiction? What’s that? Pussy talk for “you have no testicles?” Oh, right, you lost your house in Vegas and your wife left you. Geez, man, I’m sorry. Wait, I’ve got something to cheer you up – Boom! Scratch-off tickets! Who loves ya?

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. gits

    first!

  2. gits

    I’m so fucking proud!

  3. gits

    best. day. ever.

  4. gits

    Everybody else is slow and dumb.

  5. Gia

    I’m looking forward to seeing her reality show. I enjoyed watching the reality show on TLC called Big People Little World.

  6. gits

    I don’t care at all about the story.

  7. gits

    I’m looking down at all you dumb ugly fucks.

  8. rocks

    No, gits, it’s the Worst. Day. EVER!!! *slaps coworker on forehead*

    And who watches shit like this? Does Britney watch JLo’s, JLo watches Kim K’s, and I guess Paris watches her own from her wonk eye.. and they ALL watch Rock Of Love..

  9. Jen is Old Now

    hahahahah Look at the neck on that crone! Kiss of death. She has aged several years since her prenancy. Seriously, she looks like a granny now. She is through since all she had was a fat ass! Her old man looks better than her now.

  10. gits

    You’re all a bunch of tards anyway.

  11. Grunion

    Wow.great news.

    shoots self

  12. Will

    It’ll be on E, which will then change its name to The Enormous Ass Channel.

  13. Dina

    She is the only big butt woman reality show I would watch because she has talent; unlike no talent media whore Kim Kardaskank reality show where we get to see Kim act like a bitch to her family and hide her huge loose ass when wearing a swim suit ha! ha! ha! JLo does not have to wear a girdle like Kim Kardaskank ha! ha! ha!

  14. gits, you’re a total loser. Let me be the FIRST to blow you.

  15. karmapolice

    Wow, why is that big Cuban lady next to Jiminy Cricket?

  16. karmapolice

    Wow, why is that big Cuban lady next to Jiminy Cricket?

  17. Delicious Alcohol

    Didn’t she just shit out three kids? I don’t like J-lo, but she looks fucking amazing.

  18. Boston_Freek

    Tortilla spaceship. That is wicked pissah.

  19. Hag

    What is up with the neck? She needs plastic on that thing. She looks terrible. Not the same person as last year. She looks really old now.
    I guess she should retire. She never had any talent other than shaking her fat ass. That was her money maker. And it took a black comedy to launch it!
    Then
    She cut a rappish crappish album — she sings terrbly!
    Her acting is lame.
    She was sexy in a fat ass sort of way

    Waaaaay back when she was young.
    But
    Dat’s ok. She has 2 disgusting babies and a skeletal skinny old man to love her.
    Her days are running short.
    She sure looks old now and I am happy for that.
    Remember the whore said aaalllll those years ago to the monkey she was fucking something like “You should have had a gun”.
    Cunt and a whore.
    Go to Puerto Mierda and grow old there.
    Fat WRINKLED ass whore.

  20. karmapolice

    Things are funnier if you post them twice I heard.

  21. Rat

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    FOXNEWS.COM HOME > POLITICS
    Secret Service Catch Mexican Official Nabbing White House BlackBerries
    Thursday, April 24, 2008
    E-MailRespondPrint
    Share: DiggFacebookStumbleUpon
    Whether he was up to no good or simply desperate to play BrickBreaker, a Mexican press attaché was caught on camera by Secret Service pocketing several White House BlackBerries during a recent meeting in New Orleans, FOX News has learned.

    Sources with knowledge of the incident said the official, Rafael Quintero Curiel, served as the lead press advance person for the Mexican Delegation and was responsible for handling logistics and guiding the Mexican media around at the conference. He took six or seven of the handheld devices from a table outside a special room in the hotel where the Mexican delegation was meeting with President Bush earlier this week.

    Everyone entering the room was required to leave his or her cell phone, BlackBerry and other such devices on the table, a common practice when high-level meetings are held. American officials discovered their missing belongings when they were leaving the session.

    It didn’t take long before Secret Service officials reviewed videotape taken by a surveillance camera and found footage showing Quintero Curiel absconding with the BlackBerries.

    Sources said Quintero Curiel made it all the way to the airport before Secret Service officers caught up with him. He initially denied taking the devices, but after agents showed him the DVD, Quintero Curiel said it was purely accidental, gave them back, claimed diplomatic immunity and left New Orleans with the Mexican delegation.

    It is unclear what disciplinary measures, if any, await him in Mexico. White House spokeswoman Dana Perino refused to discuss the incident, telling FOX News, “We are aware of the situation, but as it’s under investigation by law enforcement officials, we will decline to comment.”

    FOX News’ James Rosen and Mike Emanuel contributed to this report.

  22. veggi

    @21- shadaaaap!! for fucks sake!!

  23. My kids destroyed your wifes vagina

    #21 thanks for the newsflash stupid fucking asshole. Next time economize on the words a lot.

  24. gotmilk?

    i love how these celebrities feel like they’re doing all us common folk a favor by gracing us with reality shows on their lives. vomit.

    and that second photo of her barely looks like J. Lo (which is a good thing) but seriously, enough with the botox.

  25. ph7

    Another woman totally wrecked by childbirth.

  26. abdo

    Why J.lo??
    I think making a reality show is a curse for celebrities
    Take Britney and Jessica for example..

  27. Auntie Kryst

    This show is destined to be the cornerstone of Telemundo’s Thursday night lineup. Be sure to tune in pendejos.

  28. RepresentingPR

    The moron who writes this stuff apparently hasn’t been out of LA. Jennifer and Marc are Puerto Rican, not Mexican. Seeing as Puerto Ricans don’t eat guacamole and tortillas, the story was idiotic. Makes as much sense as a hamburger joke about a Brit. I.E., hamburgers are American, not British.

  29. abdo

    @19
    You’re just a pathetic loser

  30. sg

    I’ll tell you how she manages to juggles… she hires people to do everything short of breathing for her.
    I’m sick of people being amazed about how “celbrities” function in the real world that the rest of live in!
    Well, I have news for you, there are plenty of working parents (and single parents, for that matter) who manage to raise their kids, have a job, and a life. We just don’t pay them millions of dollars for any of it.

  31. sunshine

    She looks like a cross between Rachel Ray and Martha Stewart now and that is not a good thing.

  32. Plastic Surgery Is Great

    This is not the same woman we used to call J-Lo. I see a chin implant and a nose job. What else?

    http://blog.borrowedbling.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/02/jennifer_20lopez_20bling_small1.jpg

  33. Stef

    Does anyone even care about JLo anymore? Fierce shoes though. Hot mess tranny fierccccccccccccccccce.

  34. Anonymous

    Dina….exactly WHAT is this Cuntasauraus’ talent? Besides being possibly the biggest bitch on the planet?

    Answer: She has no talent. She fucked her way to where she is. She is complete trash and does not deserve her fame and fortune. She is utterly nauseating.

  35. Rat

    HA HAAA
    MEXICANS SUCK!!!

  36. That is not JLO

    WOW… Can you do a before and after Jenny from the block till now?

  37. Spazz

    Great, another rich fucker showing us their ‘real’ life with nannies, maids, people cleaning up after them and playing with their children while they decide which vehicle to drive today.

    Gimme a break.

  38. Anyone who would watch this show should please immediately blow their fucking brains out!

    #1 – you are as big of a loser as J-ho
    #14 – listen troll, it’s one thing to be a douche and be happy for some unknown reason about posting 1st, but to impersonate another person on a message board really just shows how small and pathetic you are in real life. I feel sorry for you.

  39. Over the Hill and into the Valley...

    …of death! She has aged poorly. All spics age like that. Which is good. They don’t need to live long. Just mow and roof, mow and roof.

  40. What the hell makes J Lo think that other mothers care how she juggles her babies and launching a perfume. I’ll tell you how she does it..listen carefully… the secret is out..it’s called LOTS AND LOTS OF HIRED HELP. Unless her life is totally nanny free J Lo can’t be passing herself off as some mom who juggles work and kids successfully.

  41. moobs

    I hate this chick.

    Nobody cares about your little plastic life, whore.

  42. Joe C

    I predict that the editor will get an Emmy for outstanding achievement in somehow obscuring the fact that she is a bitch on wheels. An ugly bitch on wheels.

  43. Jamie's Uterus

    This self centered skanked out bitch is going to be on The Learning Channel (TLC)? What is she going to teach us? Blow job techniques? Tricks she learned to please a man, like snapping gyro? How to get an STD and lie about it effectively?

    I think the end of J-whore’s career is coming, so I bet a divorce is coming, and she’ll hook up with another media whore, maybe that Spencer douchebag???

    Go away J-skank! Go away!

  44. Old man old she's done and I love it

    Wow in one year this skank has rotted nicely into an old lady. Man now I feel sorry for her husband. He needs to dump her and get some young stuff. Damn in 5 years she will be a crone of course riddled with plastic.

  45. I think making a reality show is a curse for celebrities
    Take Britney and Jessica for example.. lol./.. You can find more at BlackWhiteKiss .c o M — for all girls to meet kinds of men, handsome, young adult, black, white

  46. How about this idea for a reality show? Just show off that big round ass! (I’m assuming she can get something close to her original figure back.)

  47. I strongly suggest you view more at BlackWhiteKiss.com where i also met many handsome men

  48. JohnnE

    Does anyone give a shit how a multi millionaire celeb “manages” motherhood and career? I’d rather see a normal single parent woman who earns $60000 a year tell us how she manages it. Kudos to them fuk Lopez.

  49. Me

    Could this post be any more racist?

  50. sissy

    She is going to have more baby! One of her friend lay out this via his blog on M I L L I O N A I R E LOVER.C O M where the millionaire & celebrtiy gather.

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