Jennifer Aniston wants John Mayer to knock her up

August 6th, 2008 // 58 Comments

Jennifer Aniston’s biological clock kicked into overdrive this week after seeing Brad Pitt in People magazine with his gaggle of kids. Apparently, she’s ready to let her uterus be a vessel for John Mayer’s offspring and prove she’s not a barren witch that lives in a gingerbread house. It’s made of graham crackers. Star reports.

The 39-year-old actress feels that after all she has been through watching Brad and Angie’s family grow, she’d love Brad to see photos of her holding her own baby and show him she’s not the self-centered girl he had made her out to be.
“It’s my turn now,” she told a friend. And Jen believes the rocker is perfect daddy material.
“Jen feels so strongly that John is ‘the one,’ ” says a source. “She knows he can handle being a dad.”

Nothing like having a child out of spite. Because that’ll really teach Angelina Jolie a lesson and not fuck the kid up for life. Then again, Jennifer Aniston with prego boobs? Hmm…. The Superficial wishes John and Jennifer the best of luck in their endeavor and would like to point out you can’t get pregnant reading this site (yet), so get crackin’. And, John, no showboating; this is serious business, so it’d probably be best if you left your guitar in its case. Harmonica too.

Photo: Flynet
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  1. zagge

    i wouder why you hate Jen so much , what have she done. She was unhappy when Brad go to AJ but it is may year now. She is cute and happy now .I hope really John and Jen get married and had cute child. Leave you own life instead
    love you Jen

  2. zagge

    i wouder why you hate Jen so much , what have she done. She was unhappy when Brad go to AJ but it is may year now. She is cute and happy now .I hope really John and Jen get married and had cute child. Leave you own life instead
    love you Jen

  3. zagge

    i wouder why you hate Jen so much , what have she done. She was unhappy when Brad go to AJ but it is may year now. She is cute and happy now .I hope really John and Jen get married and had cute child. Leave you own life instead
    love you Jen

  4. mr.camel toe

    All this bitch seems to do is lay on the beach all day and feel sorry for herself.What a pathetic whiner.Go fuck youself and take that fucknut John Mayer with you.

  5. TOEJAM

    Hey Jen,I hear America’s Greatest Dog is looking for help.

  6. Lola

    “WHAT AN IDIOT!

    who would want a 39 year old as wife when you’re 30, famous, not bad looking? He could get a mid-20-something, much hotter than her, more intelligent probably too cause that’s not so hard considering it’s Aniston.

    She’ll be 40 soon and in the next twinkle 45, saggy boobs, even more wrinkles, cellulitis, yuck.”

    Not everyone fears women out of their teens.

  7. Lola

    “What an ugly and desperate woman she is. Nobody wants to knock her up because they’re afraid their baby would look like a monster, since Jennifer has a monster face. She’s 39, she can’t have kids anyway,her biological clock had ticked away. a long time ago.”

    Menopause usually sets in in late 40s early 50s.

  8. LASH

    First off who has the right to talk about her so what she wants a child or she doesn’t what is the big deal. I say go for it if that is what she wants. It’s her life not no one elses and to those that believe all that they read get a fucking life obviously if you got nothing better to do then make jokes about other people you don’t have much of a life. Grow up people…

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