While John Mayer is allegedly wielding a Herculean wang, that doesn’t stop him from finding other ways to satisfy the ladies. Apparently he carries around an arsenal of sexy gadgets in his man-purse. Check out this report from Star on the action Jennifer Aniston is getting:
She is having the best sex of her life with John,” a source close to the actress tells Star, “and she’s loving every minute of it.”
According to the source, the singer covers her with whipped cream, which he licks off, tickles her with feathers and uses ice cubes to give her goosebumps.
“John also likes to keep things interesting with games like role playing, which is new for Jen,” says the source. “She was a little resistant at first, but now you couldn’t wipe the smile off her face if you tried.”
Another source who has slept with John agrees he knows how to have a good time between the sheets. “He was kinky and liked trying crazy positions. He loved sex and wanted it all the time.”
Role-playing, huh? I wonder how many times they argue over who gets to be Ross….
D | May 23, 2008 at 12:41 pm
For the 1st time ever…1st!
eh | May 23, 2008 at 12:42 pm
But i wanna be ross
D | May 23, 2008 at 12:42 pm
Somehow that wasn’t all I thought it’d be. I’m left empty… the exact opposite of Jennifer/s vagina…
Budreaux | May 23, 2008 at 12:44 pm
I’d fuck her. I’d fuck her until Polly came along.
Laura | May 23, 2008 at 12:46 pm
Who the hell reports such things to Star? And who the hell wants to know?
Hawt | May 23, 2008 at 12:47 pm
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm….John Mayer wang…never wanted a Mayer weiner soooooo bad…
Bruce Bromley | May 23, 2008 at 12:55 pm
OK, I hate this guy…
Cheese | May 23, 2008 at 12:57 pm
John Mayer and his publisist report this stuff to Star and idiots like us read about out it. Next we’ll hear about how he’s reallly into Karma Sutra. What a Tool.
andie | May 23, 2008 at 12:58 pm
OK, I love this guy.
ha.
*jealous*
sportsdvl | May 23, 2008 at 12:58 pm
He must be carrying around a bag of roofies to get these women to agree to sleep with him.
Oh, #1 – you are a douche
Ted Mosby | May 23, 2008 at 12:58 pm
It is nice that sources closest to Jen blab to the tabloids…if you believe this I have a bridge I’d like to sell you.
blowhard | May 23, 2008 at 1:01 pm
Sadly, while we talk about how we hate him, he’s probably got his cock halfway up Jen’s asshole. Which reminds me, shit, I missed that fucking doctor’s appointment again!
Lord Of Bacon | May 23, 2008 at 1:04 pm
Does kinky now mean unoriginal and cheesy? just wondering
Famous Plastic | May 23, 2008 at 1:06 pm
You shouldn’t have to use an ice cube to give a girl goosebumps…
I Hate Spammers | May 23, 2008 at 1:07 pm
#12:
Go kill yourself, you cocksucking, limp dicked, spooge slurping motherfucker.
PS: Fuck you!
blowhard | May 23, 2008 at 1:09 pm
They like to roleplay – she’s a level 4 unfunny big-nosed c*nt and he’s King Dildo of Shittenband
M-m-m-moTeesuh? | May 23, 2008 at 1:16 pm
What a dumb, dumb, dumbfuck. Regardless of his level of douche, he could bag way better tail than this old never was.
Marj | May 23, 2008 at 1:19 pm
How the hell does this “source” know?
sportsdvl | May 23, 2008 at 1:19 pm
I’m sorry, does anyone believe this guy has a big dick? Of course not, he IS a big dick, but no way he has one.
Dilawar from Bangalore | May 23, 2008 at 1:20 pm
She is looks nice girl. I saw, the man’s name on different internet page, he was called Oscar Mayer, I see name John here. My frends, you can tell me which is right name? (many thanks happy face)
F. Scott Fitzgerald | May 23, 2008 at 1:21 pm
Ha, whoever is doing John Mayer’s PR work deserves a raise. Planting stories about what a dynamo he is in the sack and how girls “brag” about his cock is the oldest trick in the book and a sure sign of some kind of cover-up.
Dude either can’t get it up or he’s gay. They’re just trying to frontload all these types of rumors before the real one comes outs. Pun intended?
veggi | May 23, 2008 at 1:21 pm
Uninteresting AND appalling at the same time. Sort of like a zit faced cashier at 2 am at Taco Bell..
FBI | May 23, 2008 at 1:24 pm
If you didn’t know already, Dilawar from Bangalore is one of the spammers.
chris | May 23, 2008 at 1:27 pm
I think everyone better start learning to get along and learn to live with each other or there will be no more world to live in. Make friends online and all around the world . Maybe you can try “+++****I n t i m a t e m i n g l e. c o m”+++***** which is a niche interracial dating service.
veggi | May 23, 2008 at 1:30 pm
25- you frighten me..
FRIST!!! | May 23, 2008 at 1:34 pm
When he says “let’s pretend I’m the girl” it’s not role playing.
GalPal | May 23, 2008 at 1:38 pm
This is not helpful. Does he put on a diaper and want to be nursed by mommy? Does he play the shoe store clerk and lick her feet clean at her command? Please, give me something to work with here.
IHateThem | May 23, 2008 at 1:42 pm
Um… That’s not a “smile” she can’t wipe off her face.
It’ll take a Brillo pad and acetone to get that John Mayer Industrial Strength spooge off her face…
nipolian | May 23, 2008 at 1:43 pm
Whipped cream and ice cubes are not kinky…….motorized gardening tools and house pets are kinky.
Mississippi | May 23, 2008 at 1:47 pm
Lucky bitch!
Auntie Kryst | May 23, 2008 at 2:05 pm
C’mon Jen let’s role play. I’m going to be a talented blue-eyed soul singer, and you are a respected hollywood film star on a deserted isl… Stop laughing, seriously it’ll be hot..
er, ok? | May 23, 2008 at 2:14 pm
How did they get hold of this?
Bogus.
Joco | May 23, 2008 at 2:17 pm
She has a horseface and small tits. I wouldn’t hit it because I’ve had much better
er, ok? | May 23, 2008 at 2:17 pm
Also role-play?
Wouldn’t that involve acting?
Can’t involve Aniston then
ph7 | May 23, 2008 at 2:22 pm
Role playing with a women over 35 means imagining that they are sexually attractive.
b | May 23, 2008 at 2:29 pm
sure u have joco#34, thats y u live in ur parents basement and have 3 day old underwear on as we speak.
eurotrash | May 23, 2008 at 2:35 pm
whipped cream and ice cubes huh.. sounds like what a 13yr old who just read her first cosmogirl would describe as kinky.
Tom | May 23, 2008 at 2:41 pm
I am surprized that the tabs even sell anymore with all crap they
come out with. You know a friend isn’t going to say any of this
and Jen certainly doesn’t do it. Every time she has a date, it’s
almost the same thing. They have even linked her with people she
doesn’t know. Their source is some one working there with
wild ideas. People is using fairly relieable, US has a one track
mind, Life and Style, Star and The National Enquirer are almost
never true. They aren’t worth buying anymore. In Touch and OK
sometimes come up with good articles but not all the time.
NY Ted | May 23, 2008 at 2:50 pm
I’d role play with her..I’ll dress up like a jockey and ride Jen like Big Brown in the Preakness…Giddy-up Gal…Giddy-up!!!
BunnyButt | May 23, 2008 at 2:57 pm
24, no shit. Really? We never could’ve guessed.
coco | May 23, 2008 at 3:07 pm
I’ve never been a fan of Jennifer Aniston. She always seems to have a snobby attitude. I don’t know if celebrities realize this, but when they are being overpaid as much as they are, you better smile for those cameras that keep their asses famous. The world needs to rethink paying celebrites millions for what they do. Doctors and people that really help this world need to be paid millions, not money hungry divas.
coco | May 23, 2008 at 3:07 pm
I’ve never been a fan of Jennifer Aniston. She always seems to have a snobby attitude. I don’t know if celebrities realize this, but when they are being overpaid as much as they are, you better smile for those cameras that keep their asses famous. The world needs to rethink paying celebrities millions for what they do. Doctors and people that really help this world need to be paid millions, not money hungry divas.
karmapolice | May 23, 2008 at 3:33 pm
I have noticed un upsurge in these John Mayer hetero-sex plant type items since Perez outed him for them making out at a club in NYC.
veggi | May 23, 2008 at 3:37 pm
36- that’s just uncalled for..
I’m not 35. But it IS my birthday today!!
Auntie Kryst | May 23, 2008 at 4:03 pm
@45 Right on!! Have a good birthday Veggi.
bosendorfer | May 23, 2008 at 4:21 pm
this is just publicist horseshit. she’s almost forty and probably takes anything she can get — as long as it’s got representation. he could care less. this is just trying to make an extremely uninteresting (as is anything relating to jennifer aniston) coupling into something “spicy” for their collective profile. give it up. you just can’t make aniston interesting, no matter what you do — she’s kind of like colin farrell in that regard — you can prop her up in front of as many people as you want, but she can’t carry a film and she’s not that interesting. i’m sorry, agents, you’re nearing the end of this one’s utility unless, like the SEX AND THE CITY women, you recycle them once more into their prior incarnations.
aniston WAS very attractive ten years ago, btw, now she’s aging very gracefully and old news.
mrs.t | May 23, 2008 at 4:24 pm
All these rumors are the best fucking thing that’s ever happened to John Mayer-and that includes the Grammy. At the very least, he gets endless one-night-stands for the rest of his life.
BunnyButt | May 23, 2008 at 4:27 pm
*puts on a silly hat and starts drinking straight vodka in honor of Veggi’s b-day*
Mad Hatter | May 23, 2008 at 4:35 pm
It’s my happy UN-birthday today veggi :)
PunkA | May 23, 2008 at 4:41 pm
John Mayer is about as straight as a crooked politician. IE he ain’tt The faggoty boy needs to just come clea already and give it up to Texas Tranny. We will all respect him mre after he admits it. Until then, I hope Jen gets an STD from his nasty oil stick.