Jennifer Aniston in a bikini will cure the Mondays

April 21st, 2008 // 112 Comments

After a one-two punch of Paris Hilton and Heidi Montag, I need a little something to rejuvenate the soul. Namely Jennifer Aniston’s sweet ass in a bikini. The world would be a better place if they could extract whatever makes that thing so sexy and put it in IV’s at the hospital. Brain tumor? Have some butt juice. Broken leg? No problem.

NOTE: Totally noticed the chick’s boob above Jennifer Aniston’s head. Let’s just say there was some deliberate cropping on my end. Feel free to call me the Da Vinci of mammaries. No, seriously, do it. I’ll be your best friend.

superficial

  1. ldsqtbea

    shes pretty :)

  2. tj

    NICE!!!!

  3. Johnjohn

    I’ll take the girl with the big rack behind her! Aniston doesn’t have any tits.

  4. arligt

    you surely do make the moste fucked-up metaphors fish.

  5. Jackson

    It is nice to see a hot tight ass. She is hot and does not have to cover her tight ass like Kim Kardaskank. Kim Kardaskank has to cover her huge cellulite loose ass when wearing a swim suit.

  6. Bill Clinton

    Just what I needed to pick me up from the Monday blues… some sweet sweet Aniston ass.

    Newman, you magnificent bastard, you did it!!!!!!!

  7. Who is the chick with the mondo boobs behind her??

  8. jim

    first!!!! go Guam!

  9. Spazz

    She has a healthy, normal, non-altered looking body.
    I’d hit it. Repeatedly.

  10. It is a good thing she has a good bikini wax. That would be pretty funny to see her with her legs spread and a 70′s bush poking out the sides of her bottoms.

  11. mc

    yawn* i’m bored with all this sunshine and shit…oh wait i know, i’ll bend over right here in front of this paparazzi and show the world my girl parts in white panties…yah, that made my day.

    what makes her so sexy? it’s the twat man, anyone can see that. typical celebretard getting atention. so predictable.

  12. havoc

    Make no mistake about it.

    I’d hit that.

    .

  13. PunkA

    I would hit that so hard my belly button would hurt….she is just hot and classy.

  14. Oveta

    huge fake tits are gross.

  15. Crappola

    Holy Cow… who’s the chick with the rack behind Jennifer Aniston? WTFNKOTB?!?! Something is totally wrong with the Superficial writer if he missed those massive mammories!

  16. poonmoon

    Ya, ya I’m a married straight girl so these do nada for me, but after those hideousterous horrible H bitches, Heidi and Hilton, as Fish indicated you boys and lesbians have earned yourselves some unspoiled ass, just makes sure to wash your hands before dinner.

    Now what I noticed immediately was the bitch with the cig hangin’ out her mouth, looking like a fucking poker playing dude. WOW that’s fucking classy as hell lady, just beautiful. Ya, Audrey Hepburn called she wants her pose back. Man, you are too much you elegant, refined, sophisticated woman, Princess Diana had nothing on you eh chimney face. I bet even her hoohah smells like tabacco and menthol. Naaaaaaaaaaaasty!

    Okay happy masturbating folks.

  17. @16, Now if you could only take those massive mammories and put them on Jen!!

  18. dude_on_a_wire

    @12 – she is an A-lister giving us a first rate doggie tease – and you call this predictable? That is like getting a pony for Christmas and saying you were really hoping for something else.

    Take a good look at that ass – it doesn’t get any better than that. This is the best post on this site in eons. fish doesn’t have to worry about being humorous if he is going to deliver Jenass in a white nothing.

    – I continue to be apalled and outraged at your obvious indignation of Jen’s sweet A-list ass. That is an ass to be worshipped.

  19. antoine

    I’m more interested in the mountain of boobs behind her in the first and last picture.

  20. Mel

    Gee poonmoon, the language you used in that post is just the EPITOME of class! Pat yourself on the BACK!

  21. combustion8

    I’d hit it til it bled.. then I’d hit it harder.

  22. ph7

    Old and saggy.

    Put that cow out to pasture. She has no more use on this planet, except to whine and bitch.

  23. deacon jones

    Someone needs to hook me up with some roofies so I can plop two in that bitches drink behind her and drag her back to her hotel room, Tarzan style

  24. nipolian

    Don Imus is going to get a bad sunburn by not wearing his cowboy hat to the pool. (pic 7)

  25. deacon jones

    lol, look at the dude in Pic 9
    “yeah Jen, Im coming, yeah baby, yeah”

  26. Auntie Kryst

    Fish, I’m not complaining, thank you for these photos. I just want to be clear, this is just Jen relaxing by the pool right?? She’s not relaxing on the set of an upcoming zany romantic comedy?

  27. BunnyButt

    If you like your boobs natural, then you don’t want the big ones behind Jen. The woman is lying on her back, those boobs are staying on her chest instead of sliding back towards her armpits, she’s got implants. Just saying. Of course, if you like ‘em big and don’t care how they got big, well, go get ‘em, hoss.

  28. Matt

    Well, to try to say something nice about her…her aging ass and legs have a lot less fat than those thunder-thighed porkers around her.

    Got any pics of attractive girls in bikinis, Fish?

  29. Harry

    Meh…Brad Pitt definitely traded up.

  30. @28, Bunny she is young and her top could be holding them in place. At least I would like to think those bad boys were real..

  31. Kill Matt

    @29 yeah whatever you ugly pimply fuck Aniston wouldn’t spit on you if you were on fire ageing on not (and yes wankers its ageing in ENGLISH you American retards ought to learn to spell English properly) .

  32. Matt

    oops, I forgot the “e”, as in “rottEn tEEth” or “dEclining influEncE”

  33. Barkingrex

    I demand the name of giant boobs girl. Someone track down who that is.

  34. What, no topless shot? I’m disappointed. ;-) Truthfully, she’s better looking then Jenna Jameson and all the other fakers.

  35. PP

    29–Go look at Playboy and you can see all the perfect implant photoshoped females.

  36. Paige

    31

    A lot of men are clueless when it comes to the real thing. Probably from looking at too many altered images of females and hard implants that stay put lol!

  37. nipolian

    #32 – actually, according to Webster either spelling is correct, however “aging” is the prefered method in America. Perhaps you should spend less time correcting others spelling and study up on the proper use of punctuation. Just a suggestion.

  38. Crappola

    @19 If that would happen… her work and my penis would double in size. But I thank ol’ Jen-Jen for not getting them augmented… I mean really… who needs a penis kickstand? Although… It would give me the edge I need to apply for work at the “Freaks-of-Cock” series.

    … But that’s only if Jen-Jen wants to be sanctified and made into a saint after she passes on.

  39. Matt

    Yeah, sure, it’s inarguable that you have to go to Playboy and look at photoshopped images to see anything better than 39-year-old Jennifer Maniston.

    No wonder she always has that constipated look on her face, with her fans’ heads so far up her ass.

  40. ph7

    Looks like a mom. Boring, saggy, old.

    Next, please. You purpose in life (being nubile) in over.

  41. ph7

    Looks like a mom. Boring, saggy, old.

    Next, please. You purpose in life (being nubile) is over.

  42. Erica

    Agreed, looks like a mom. Without ever having had kids. Pathetic.

  43. Binky

    I think she looks great !
    (But personally , I think when they brought in Don Knotts as ‘Mr. Roper’ it ruined her show.
    It sort of screamed ‘desperation’ etc.)

  44. Tyler

    Kim Kardaskank looks like a mom with her huge fat loose cellulite ass and fat thighs. Jennifer is fit and it shows.

  45. Der...Duh...Doye...I tink she's my real friend!!!!

    Jen’s always smiling in all of these candid pictures! I love her so much! What a nice, generous, cheerful girl! Just like she was on “Friends”!

  46. Andy

    I wish the focus better on the hands-and-knees picture. I think I can see the tip of the stick that’s been up her ass all these years.

  47. poonmoon

    Mel, I knew someone would bring that up and wow congratulations it was you. You win the “obivously butthole” prize. This is the superficial where we air out our inner evil, potty mouthed, angry, horny side, but few of us actually behave like this in public. This is also a place of humour which is found in contradictions. So you can’t take what I wrote seriously and as an author I was writing in character anyway. Besides I am such a lady I’d make Princess Diana look like Rosanne Bar and I could care less if you believe me I am what I am.

    P.S. Clearly you are a smoker or you wouldn’t have gotten so pissy about what I wrote.

  48. viva viagra

    me likee.

  49. Too bad her movies are awful.

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