Jennifer Aniston dating Orlando Bloom – or a guy with brown hair

has some crack reporters on their staff. I’m not sure if they’ve unearthed some legitimate celebrity gossip or just pulled stuff out of their ass. At any rate, they’re claiming Jennifer Aniston and Orlando Bloom were at a resort together in Mexico. Here are the details, I think:

Jennifer Aniston has been spotted holidaying in Mexico with a man that looks suspiciously like Lord Of The Rings star Orlando Bloom.
Although the photograph is a bit vague, Hollywood gossips are excited about the prospect of a new A-list couple.
The picture shows the former Friends beauty photographed sunbathing in a skimpy brown bikini while a topless toned hunk looks on admiringly.
A fellow holidaymaker at the luxurious resort said: “They were trying their best to be discreet but it was clear they were together.”

So Jennifer Aniston is dating a man with brown hair. It might be Orlando Bloom or it might not be. You know what? I’m just going to start making stuff up too. This just in: Jennifer Aniston is dating oxygen. The two were spotted together at a downtown café. Onlookers couldn’t help but notice oxygen spending a large amount of time in Jennifer’s mouth before going deeper into her chest. Jennifer had an on/off relationship with Vince Vaughn but seems to have found herself a more aggressive lover in this Periodic Table of Elements star.

UPDATE: Captain America talks about his one night stand with Jennifer Aniston. Check back later for the saucy details.