Jennifer Aniston, in her epic quest to be goddamn everywhere I look, stopped by Letterman last night where she bestowed upon Dave the conveniently placed tie from her nude GQ photo shoot. (Have you heard about that? I mean today – for the hundredth time.) Anyway, here’s a short transcript of the exchange:
JENNIFER: This is an early Christmas present.
DAVE: Oh, my. Get a close-up on this, will ya? That is the tie.
JENNIFER: Well, put it on. *claps*
DAVE: I would, but it seems to be giving off an overpowering scent of vinegar and water.
JENNIFER: What? The last person who had it – JOHN!
JOHN MAYER: *sings offstage* I magically play the guitar, let me put my penis in you…
JENNIFER: Yes, master.
DAVE: Yes, master.
JOHN: Damn, overshot that one. *sings* David Letterman, put your pants back on…
Miramire | December 18, 2008 at 11:21 am
nice
water curses | December 18, 2008 at 11:38 am
hmm, second, maybe third.
at least someone else is getting the spotlight.
Sephystal | December 18, 2008 at 11:38 am
HaHa you’re funny.
RichPort's Ghost | December 18, 2008 at 11:39 am
Really, the title implies boobs. Damn you Fish!
TJ | December 18, 2008 at 11:51 am
Tight looking legs…think maybe she could squeeze John’s dick with them?
Deuce Bigalow | December 18, 2008 at 11:54 am
Hot with a capital ‘Wow’
Famous Plastic | December 18, 2008 at 12:02 pm
Has she ever been in a good movie? Is she just a “star” because she won’t shut up about Angelina and Brad?
Jrz | December 18, 2008 at 12:02 pm
GAH! LOOK AT HER FEET!
RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!
j | December 18, 2008 at 12:06 pm
Why is she holding her tummy? Dumdumdum.
Ewww | December 18, 2008 at 12:07 pm
Granny feet!, her hands/knees/neck are not nice either and they didn’t look that way on the GQ cover so I bet her butt and tits are equally wrinkly and saggy.
Seth | December 18, 2008 at 12:13 pm
I don’t understand why she’s so desperate to stay in the spotlight and bring up Brad and Angelina, instead of moving on. Off all people, I’d have thought Jen could really take one on the chin.
Holly | December 18, 2008 at 12:14 pm
Too bad they can’t airbrush live TV in real time. =(
http://www.hollysdailyrant.blogspot.com
PunkA | December 18, 2008 at 12:22 pm
How much you wanna bet that she had crazy sex in that dress and that it ended up thrown in the corner of the room after Mayer wiped himself off on it?
Camel | December 18, 2008 at 12:29 pm
Fish, your dialogue jokes are seriously terrible. Maybe shit like that is funny in person, when incredibly drunk, but it’s not so funny reading it, incredibly sober. It makes you look 12. Don’t write those anymore.
Bickus Dickus | December 18, 2008 at 12:33 pm
yes, those pics prove how a good airbrusher can make you still look hot on magazine covers, but in-action paparazzi shots tell another story.
Jen is just a middle aged yenta with saggy tits, flabby legs, a graying snatch and just a few botox shots away from looking like Ivana Trump….
as to the question “Why is she famous?” well, it’s true she has never made a good movie (Office Space was great but not because of her), but hell, Paris Hilton is famous for just being a stupid whore who parties alot, so it’s not incomprehendable that Rachel, eer Jen is famous…
Kelley | December 18, 2008 at 12:56 pm
Enough Jennifer !!!! Pleease.
effyeray | December 18, 2008 at 1:12 pm
Just fade away and die you never-was skag.
dude | December 18, 2008 at 1:14 pm
those are some stringy lookin’ frog legs. Gross.
PunkA | December 18, 2008 at 1:37 pm
For those of you ripping on her body, she is weeks from 40. For 40, she looks awesome. She is not 25, and guess what, aging happens. You fat pieces of loser shit could only wish to hit it with someone that hot when you are 40, but you’ll be cuddling up to some fat chick with butt cheese, cheese thighs and body odor. She has been annoying lately with all her talk on Brad/Angelina, but no denying she looks amazing for her age.
stop the dialogue jokes | December 18, 2008 at 1:49 pm
Camel, coudn’t agree more. The dialogue jokes are super lame and need to stop. Please, Superficial, be funny again.
Mama Pinkus | December 18, 2008 at 2:16 pm
That 40th birthday looming in less than two months hitting that gal HARD
WTF | December 18, 2008 at 2:27 pm
I turned the headphone waaaay and couldn’t hear the singing!! What gives?
Sport | December 18, 2008 at 2:31 pm
she looks pretty hot you fools, for a 40 yr old woman?
Have you ever BEEN with a woman?
blinded | December 18, 2008 at 3:08 pm
I’m having a problem reading the posts because of all these rude ads all over this page.
salmon | December 18, 2008 at 3:33 pm
YOU aging old bagLosers she looks beautiful and perhaps she may be carring a lttle one G*d Bless her
effyeray | December 18, 2008 at 4:16 pm
#19 PunkAss lil bitch. I date chicks from 25-40 and most of them would cry if they woke up looking like Aniston. I mean she is fairly pretty (post nose-job), but body wise that shit looks like chewed bubble-gum. There is this thing called tone you fucktard. Thin does not equal healthy or in shape. Get a fucking clue you twat.
jeezy mc jeeze | December 18, 2008 at 5:10 pm
Where are all the people who were talking about how hot she is when her GQ pics came out now? not the same without photoshop eh?
PunkA | December 18, 2008 at 5:50 pm
#26. If you think Aniston is not toned, your idea of a toned chick has to be a guy in drag. Who’s the fucktard now, bitch?!
Barry O | December 18, 2008 at 6:20 pm
She’s got old lady legs. Without an army of GQ photoshoppers & publicists, she just looks like a raptor from Jurassic Park.
Sandaroo | December 18, 2008 at 7:12 pm
to #28 you made my day!
Paul | December 18, 2008 at 9:23 pm
Ugh, you people make me sick. She’s hideous. Look at those old, veiny crypt keeper hands. She’s a leathery, over-tanned, rapidly aging, chain-smoking crypt keeper. How the Hell is that considered hot?? Terrible actress, too, by the way. One speed: Rachel Green.
lindary | December 18, 2008 at 9:29 pm
She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now?
lindary | December 18, 2008 at 9:30 pm
She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now?
Me 2 | December 18, 2008 at 9:32 pm
@18, nah I think she has great legs for her age but her feet are giving her away. She should have worn ankle boots.
kick | December 18, 2008 at 10:19 pm
wow so hot ! i aslo tell you another good place !Somedays ago i saw a website…………www.sugarbabymatch.com………….. here.when i sing up there ,haha .fantastic ! beauty,beauty!manymany beautythere! i had a dating yesterday!wow wow ! it is my faverite! You have any interest to lovers ,you can have a try there!
nick | December 18, 2008 at 10:21 pm
wow so hot ! i aslo tell you another good place !Somedays ago i saw a website…………www.sugarbabymatch.com………….. here.when i sing up there ,haha .fantastic ! beauty,beauty!manymany beautythere! i had a dating yesterday!wow wow ! it is my faverite! You have any interest to lovers ,you can have a try there!
missywissy | December 18, 2008 at 11:00 pm
Jennifer. The new Spencer and Heidi. This gal is a washup. sorry, but she is so obnoxious. I thought her and Brad Pitt were doomed from the beginning. Friends star marries the most elegant and beautiful man in Hollywood. Silly Brad. Now he’s with incest/beastiality/mutilating/lesbian gal. At least he’s not queer.
missywissy | December 18, 2008 at 11:02 pm
P.S. Her smile is cheesy in the photo with the dude’s elbow on her booby.
gerard Vandenberg | December 19, 2008 at 12:03 am
As long as the scientology-stuff & men aren’t involved I PREFER WOMEN!!
SO JENN IS THE ONE & ONLY WINNER HERE, folks!!
White Male | December 19, 2008 at 3:41 am
whitewomensuck.blogspot.com
Sally Jones | December 21, 2008 at 10:14 am
Why does she keep clapping like a seal in heat? Is it at all possible for her to be more annoying? Screw off already lady. Brad is gone and he’s never coming back! What a hag.
mel | December 21, 2008 at 2:38 pm
She’s beautiful but her voice makes her instantly unattractive. She cackles like a demented grandma.
Sad Desperate JEN! | December 24, 2008 at 9:14 am
get a life jen! you are a sad old hag!
hdd media player | May 20, 2010 at 7:15 am
New Spencer and Heidi. This girl is a washup. Sorry, but it is very unpleasant. I thought her and Brad Pitt were doomed from the start. Guys in Hollywood star married the most beautiful and handsome man. Brad stupid. Now with the incest / beastiality / / lesbian girl is mutilating. At least he’s not gay.