We Went To The Movies And All You Got Are These Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Photos

April 4th, 2014 // 46 Comments

Alright, folks, apparently the summer blockbuster season starts the first weekend of April now, so by the time you’re reading this Photo Boy and I are on our way to see Captain America: The Winter Soldier where there will be no hand holding or butterfly kisses. I don’t care what that hobo we paid to film us says. He’s a drunk. So while we do that, and you wait with bated breath for my review later today, here’s whoever the hell Jennifer Metcalfe is. (The bikini pickins were slim. Sue me.) And if that does nothing for you, below is Conan O’Brien giving Jordan Schlansky a cowboy makeover which should immediately send you plummeting down a YouTube hole to find more of him because my God:

“I have a cappuccino and a savory pastry.” This man is a Terminator. He is a Terminator sent back from the future to blend into humanity except robots have no idea how normal people talk and now we are richer for it.

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Photos: Abaca/AKM-GSI

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  1. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s a lot of teeth going on here, but aside from that, very nice.

  2. I’m still scratching my head over the April release of Winter Soldier, as opposed to over the summer. Is it:
    a) the studio thought it was going to suck, like so many major releases in April (i.e., just before summer blockbuster season begins) movies tend to?
    b) Disney is trying to take some wind out of the sails of The Amazing Spiderman 2 when that movie “officially” kicks off the summer season next month?
    c) the movie ties in to the current storyline of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., as one source tells me?
    d) other?

    • “Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.” is your best guess here – “Winter Soldier” has huge impact with the TV show.

      The movie was going to make a shitload of money, regardless of when it would be release, though – it’s really good.

  3. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Aw, dat’s cute.

  4. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Note to all the fat bloggers: These are CURVES

    • Really...?

      She’s a Brit – had lipo done to get them hips narrower as dieting wasn’t enough.

      If you image search her, there are loads of shots of her in full figure, a much better view imo.

  5. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Hot couple. Whew.

  6. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    PassingTrue
    Commented on this photo:

    “Make a wish” Oops, already did.

  7. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    PornKing
    Commented on this photo:

    Those are some huge thighs for such a tiny upper body. Conspicuously missing: Any shots from the back.

  8. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    The only ass shots in the gallery are of the dude (not pictured here, thanks). Somebody roll up a newspaper and hit Photo Boy on the nose for that.

  9. CrashHell

    heehehehe, jokes on him, with those narrow hips she can only have about 6 or 7 children, LOLZ

  10. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Wemma Atson
    Commented on this photo:

    Smash that ’till next Thursday. Then maybe some more after that.

  11. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    nope
    Commented on this photo:

    also cankles…sorry no

  12. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    JBJJ
    Commented on this photo:

    Frank, I was thinking the SAME thing. With a figure like that and an ass, you’re not going to hang out a bit longer to get that shot. Photo FAIL.

  13. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Commented on this photo:

    i would tongue her asshole…

  14. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    nostandards
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m liking the ratios on display here.

  15. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Legal Secretaries Need Love Too
    Commented on this photo:

    holy granola

  16. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Ronaldo
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow….very nice

  17. MarketingMike

    Interesting looking girl. First, she had her bottom rib removed,
    and she’s definitely had liposuction. No implants, which would
    have balanced out her look. As for the cankles, they are a deal
    killer for me. No ass shots either, which raises a red flag.

    Hefner had most of his girls in the 50′s-60′s do the rib thing
    it was kind of his signature, along with well designed implants.
    Ever since his daughter took over, the quality of his girls has
    gone to hell, it’s all about the bottom line for them now.

    • Rib removal surgery would leave scars, wouldn’t it? What’s your information source?

      • MarketingMike

        They hired doctors called “Plastic Surgeons”.
        The scar was minimal, usually hidden below the waist line,
        Look it up, you might be surprised.

      • A surgeon would need to make a large incision to access a rib from below the waistline, as you suggest, which is why the procedure is performed, if at all, at the same time as an abdominoplasty. Have you seen abdominoplasty scars? They’re 6+ inches long, more like 12. A more direct approach still leaves a visible scar about 2 inches across under the rib cage on either side. If by “do the rib thing” you mean cosmetic rib removal, I very much doubt that either Jennifer or Hef’s girls had it . If you can substantiate either claim I’ll eat crow.

        The signature “wasp waist” of a Playboy Bunny, however, was achieved with vertical stays in the costume to cinch the waist, compressing the rib cage (and internal organs, possibly.)

    • bob

      Lol, you moron. Get a brain ffs

  18. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Guso
    Commented on this photo:

    se me hace gorda !!!

  19. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Commented on this photo:

    UK soap actress. Sadly she’s as thick as a fish and has a horrible accent. Incredibly bonable proportions though :)

  20. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    mikeJ
    Commented on this photo:

    wow very nice armpits. i’m surprised

  21. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    mikeJ
    Commented on this photo:

    great shot of her beautiful armpits

  22. MarketingMike

    Hey, at least she keeps the unibrow trimmed.
    Honestly, I wouldn’t spend much time on her face.

  23. MarketingMike

    WAIT, we may have misjudged the girl!
    Check this out:
    http://pics.wikifeet.com/Jennifer-Metcalfe-Feet-1266994.jpg

  24. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    What's that, hmm?
    Commented on this photo:

    I would ejaculate in and around all her naughty bits!

  25. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Butch
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yes, I’ve heard of centaurs, why do you ask?”

  26. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    heavy
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy f@*k. Look at those hips. To die for. Amazing. “Hipnotizing”.

  27. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    anonym
    Commented on this photo:

    now those are curves. jesus fuckin unreal.

    Her thighs are juicy as hell as well. and dat ass.

  28. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    anonym
    Commented on this photo:

    Those curves are only found in cartoons.

    me likey

  29. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Pad Britt
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim Kardashian admires her reflection in the mirror. Of Erised.

  30. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn, this gal’s got some curves!

  31. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Harsky & Starch
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d faceplant into that ass…

  32. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    her thighs look like tree trunks

  33. Jennifer Metcalfe Bikini Greg Lake
    Commented on this photo:

    would love to see a pic of your “sexy ankles” (whatever the fuck that means) here’s some ACTUAL cankles for you: http://s188.photobucket.com/user/aussie__9/media/cankles.jpg.html
    http://s188.photobucket.com/user/aussie__9/media/cankles.jpg.html

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