Jennifer Love Hewitt Works For eHarmony Now
According to Crazy Days and Nights, eHarmony has supposedly hired Jennifer Love Hewitt as their new spokesperson which makes sense considering she’s practically the face of surprisingly inevitable spinsterism despite living in a world gone tit-mad. Except if this report’s to be believed, she’s treating it like nothing more than a quick paycheck:
They are paying her and they are also setting her up. They found one guy and flew him to Los Angeles for a date. He says that she was bored, disinterested and was just doing it for the money.
Here’s where they lost me: There is absolutely no way in hell Jennifer Love Hewitt is having men thrown at her and not trying to lure them into a false sense of security so they won’t notice the bear traps she cleverly placed all around the restaurant. Unless, of course, this guy walked in and said hello by slapping her three pre-selected rings out of her hand and yelling, “Bitch, I ain’t no marryin’ fool.” And even then.
(Thanks to Betsy who apparently makes bitchin’ mix tapes.)