Jennifer Love Hewitt Will Only Respond To ‘White Kim Kardashian’ Now

“Wait. Should I have pried this door open with a black penis?” Jennifer Love Hewitt found herself thinking aloud. “Or do I let the Wookiee driver open it? God, this is hard, but apparently it’s how you land a husband these day- Hey, you there! Paparazzo. No ass shots. Or I’ll.. I’ll.. sic my mother on you. Yes, that’s how she does it.”

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