Jennifer Love Hewitt Thinks Her Breasts Are Worth $5 Million

Some people will say Holly Madison has absolutely nothing to offer humanity as a whole, but that’s not true because she insured her breasts for $1 million so now other women feel threatened by that and have to say their tits are worth more. A situation I like to believe we’re all richer for, so here’s Jennifer Love Hewitt saying hers are worth $5 million. Via Radar:

The nicely endowed 34-year-old actress, who wears a 36C bra, told USA Today in a video interview, “I need like, an insurance invitation. If somebody was like, ‘Hey, you know what? We would like to insure your boobs for $2.5 million dollars,’ I’d be like, ‘Do it. Love it! Why not?'” She pointed to her chest and laughed, “These things right here are worth $5 million!”

Presumably she’s not talking about their ability to land her a husband, not the amount of money they made her for The Client List, a Lifetime show about giving dudes handjobs that her 86-year-old grandmother can’t get enough of which I now know and am forcing onto you:

Hewitt, now on her second season of the sexy Lifetime show The Client List, in which she plays a mom-turned-prostitute, also revealed that her 86-year-old grandmother “loves to call me the TV ho. She thinks it’s hysterical … I get to rub abs for a living.”

“Hi, grandma! Did you watch last night?”
“Oh, dearie, who in the world taught you to handle a man’s penis like that? Your grandfather would’ve sold me to a mining camp. Grandma would show you how to do it right, but this darn arthritis…”
“Do you think that’s why I can’t find a husband?”
“Are there still three rings in your purse?”
“There’s your answer. Toot-a-loo!”

Photos: Fame, Getty, Flynet, INFdaily, Splash News WENN