I Shall Call Them ‘Bradifer Coopez’

September 12th, 2011 // 38 Comments

When we last left Bradley Cooper he was reportedly having sex with Olivia Wilde, so it only makes sense that he’d eventually move on to the much older and less attractive Jennifer Lopez, who let’s assume immediately milked this puppy for publicity. TMZ reports:

We’re told the two hit up Per Se, a restaurant located at Columbus Circle in New York City. We’re told the dinner was “romantic” and was just the two of them.

I actually wasn’t being sarcastic when I said this makes sense because has anyone ever looked directly at Renee Zellweger? Clearly, Bradley Cooper’s the type of guy who looks for a relationship like a stray dog looking for a home. “Penis? Touch my penis?” *rolls over*

Photos: Splash News

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  1. Bradley Cooper Jennifer Lopez
    Darya
    Commented on this photo:

    Honestly I’m sick and tired of this senseless gossip, he only had one dinner with a colleague actress for business reasons. Of course actors and actresses hang out if attending public events together!!! I don’t think they’re now flirting or will end up together anytime soon. It’s been said of every damn actress he happened to run into lately. I understand the purpose of gossiping but poor Bradley this is getting ridiculous!!!

  2. Bradley Cooper Jennifer Lopez
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    He has nice eyes but that doesn’t excuse his relentless famewhore dating practices. For god’s sake….Jennifer Lopez? He has no shame.

  3. Cock Dr

    Well JLo must be happy now that she’s finally free of dead-man-walking husband. She can go out and play with all the D list Hollywood dicks….like this one.

  4. Dude of Dudes

    Clearly he doesnt understand the concept of trading up.

  5. JLO

    i call them JLO.

  6. einstein

    Perfect couple! Both equally nauseating….

  7. Alex

    Man! From Olivia Wilde to JLo? Talk about trading up! Give this man the US presidency!

  8. Hm. He’s a little fleshier than her last one. But I guess it’s the same for him.

  9. This guy loves old lady sex…..Renee Zellweger, Jennifer Aniston, Jennifer Lopez……..who’s next Betty White?

  10. She should have waited until the sheets dried before bedding down the next guy!

  11. Per Se?

    [GROAN]

    Oh fucking brother :P

  12. Ana

    Like a stray dog looking for a home, you say? I hear Jennifer Love Hewitt is looking to adopt!

  13. Darya

    Honestly I’m sick and tired of this senseless gossip, he only had one dinner with a colleague actress for business reasons. Of course actors and actresses hang out if attending public events together!!! I don’t think they’re now flirting or will end up together anytime soon. It’s been said of every damn actress he happened to run into lately. I understand the purpose of gossiping but poor Bradley this is getting ridiculous!!!

  14. Though missing his backwards baseball cap and Sigma Epsilon Luau Night ’97 t-shirt, Bradley’s, “Dude, I just bagged that Puerto Rican MILF” hi-five pose is unmistakable.

  15. they can both B-Lo me

  16. kimmykimkim

    Oh, they hit up Per Se, did they? How fancy-I mean douchey.

  17. TheListener

    Personally, if I had a choice between Olivia Wilde and Jennifer Lopez, I’d go with Jennifer Lopez, too. Younger doesn’t always equal prettier.

  18. Chauncy

    Bradley Cooper’s acting is about as interesting as staring at a pile of bricks. Maybe in his world JLo is hot and spicy, something he never experienced growing up in his milk toast world. But JLo – she is suppose to be a very vile and nasty bitch. And Lord knows she’s been trying to wipe the Puerto Rican off herself ever since she started in entertainment.

    • Richard McBeef

      It’s actually milquetoast, not milk toast, and it doesn’t even really make sense in the way you used it. Don’t use words you don’t understand to try to sound smart. It just makes you seem like you want to be a bigger douche than what you are.

      • Milk toast is a perfectly cromulent word.

      • Chauncy

        Thanks for the correction Mr. Wordsmith. The word can be spelled both ways and as far as my usage…you know what I meant. Sorry, you’ll have to go be a hero somewhere else.

        I know you’re upset because Bradley Cooper chose JLo over you but that’s the way life goes sometimes. You might want to give Nathan Lane a call!

      • Richard McBeef

        $5 says you take an antique typewriter to the coffeeshop while you pen whimsical horseshit with words you think make you seem cool.

      • Richard McBeef

        Also you got called out using words you don’t understand, no reason to get all butthurt and go with the “well, you’re gay” response.

    • kimmykimkim

      Chauncy, you’re such a fucking chauncy.

  19. forrest gump

    we just name them holes.
    …………….ASS-HOLES to be precize.

    • kimmykimkim

      Oh my god. You actually posted something that makes grammatical sense. I’m flabbergasted. I’ll leave you alone about the spelling since this is quite a huge moment for you.

  20. Bradley Cooper Jennifer Lopez
    Commented on this photo:

    Even one of the photogs behind Bradley Cooper found him so uninteresting that he didn’t bother to take the lens cap off.

  21. bitingontinfoil

    I prefer Brannifer Cooz

  22. Jamie Lynn's Uterus

    Sounds like JHO bag has whored herself out again as Bradley Cooper’s next beard. She’ll do anything to be white, and for cash. She’s a disgusting, vile, fake piece of useless untalented trash.

  23. Meh

    Hey he likes to be the pretty one. What I don’t get is that all his former flames were really lean, so I thought that was his type, but now with Lardass Lopez I see that his type is a woman whose been divorced(every girl he has dated has been) since he had a short lived marriage himself which obviously traumatized him and so he likes to get with women no matter thier looks who can understand his marital pain. Hold up, he is REALLY REALLY pretty and cares about women beyond their looks and seems to want life experiences in common with his lovahs, so are we sure he’s not a woman? Bradelina?

    • TomFrank

      He’s probably straight. Recent divorcées can be way hot in the sack, since they want to prove that it wasn’t their fault, sexually, that the marriage went south.

      • Meh

        Huh, as a woman, I never thought about that, but it totally makes sense. If I come back as a man in a next life or end up realizing I’m a lesbian then I will totally use that one.

  24. Studley Hungwell

    I think we should go with “Coo-Lo”

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