Jennifer Lawrence Hates Babies And Jesus

“You got double asking price for my dead baby’s parts? Up top!”

In what will surely never be misconstrued as a knock on women who choose to be stay at home moms or even women who don’t somehow find themselves as the absolute leading voice of their profession and/or generation, Jennifer Lawrence told Glamour that she’s a successful woman thanks to Planned Parenthood secretly supplying her with condoms and birth control behind her super religious mom’s back. How could that possibly get spun into awful dreck about fetus auctions? Via The Frisky:

JL: …Amy’s the most empathetic person I’ve ever met in my life. When she came over this morning, she was crying. She had just…seen the news about the shooting at Planned Parenthood. It’s so awful…. It isn’t an attack on abortions; it’s an attack on women. Because Planned Parenthood is so much more [than abortion]. My mom was really religious with me when I was young. She’s not so much anymore. And I wouldn’t have been able to get birth control if it weren’t for Planned P. I wouldn’t have been able to get condoms and birth control and all these things I needed as a normal teenager who was growing up in a Jesus house.
CL: So did you go to Planned Parenthood for those things?
JL: Yes, I did. And now [gestures widely] I am a successful woman who has not had a pregnancy.
CL: Congratulations.
JL: Thank you. [Laughs.] But seriously. What harm comes from supplying people with birth control, condoms, Pap smears, and cancer screenings?

What harm? How ’bout sluts, Jen? How ’bout eternal damnation, hellfire, and women going to college and filling their heads with liberal pussy shit until there’s no room left for her famous buffalo chicken dip recipe that she makes for me and the boys on Sundays?! Why don’t we just take the ashes of what it used to mean to be a woman in America and sweep them under Obama’s prayer rug along with my right to purchase a gun in a Holiday Inn conference room and not have health insurance so when I get mouth cancer from chewing tobacco the healthcare system has to absorb the tremendous cost of my stupidity?! I WANT MY COUNTRY BACK, KATNISS!!

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