Jen’s To Do List
1. Wreck a home.
2. Get tattoos.
3. Abduct children.
4. Shit a baby into the water in Africa. (Check w/ gyno if still fertile.)
If I were foreign, now would be a good time to hide my kid in the crawlspace.
Photo: INFdaily, Splash News
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It is hurting me how lame that necklace is.
and nipples poking out of her shirt! Why do women spoil their feet like this, same with kenly a post back! Some guys have a foot fetish and a stupid tattoo, especially of a dogs name just spoils it!
5. Make yet another shitty movie.
I would love to tattoo her ass with my white ink gun.
Some broads are so damn hot they can get away with murder. She can wreck my home any time she wants. She can drive a cement truck through my front door. I don’t care.
BTW – I would pound that like a cheap piece of veal.
I could probably work up enough of a boner to rub one out to this picture, but only if I imagine that blurry truck as speeding out of control.
She’s girl next door , not next door whore !
Not hot , just lukewarm and cooling
but I would probably pound it like abalone at least once
I would hit it like it owed me money !
@Butch
Whoa! You mean like, wrapped in wax paper, with a mallet on the counter?
Bend it over a chair and drive it hard . I am sorry , I mis – used the earlier analogy
spoon it on the couch while watching a romantic movie and then cuddle it all night long.
Mount her like a trophy !
@Richard McBeef – you are talking about the abalone, right?
I would tie her up and pound that ass like I do my step-daughter.
@mcBeef:
She’ll see right through that!
I would plow her like a Minnesota driveway.
Also boobs. Really nice boobs.
can’t think of anything funny. but I do hope that ice cube down her back wasn’t that cold
I like that she got a tattoo of her dog’s name….i am going to do the same someday…..(not because JA did- lol)
If was holding that ankle with my left hand and holding her other ankly with my right, splitting the difference (if you catch my drift), I could read it perfectly. For now, I will just imagine that it says ‘Always thrust harder’.
Women’s fertility peaks between the ages of 22 to 26, and so does their outer appearance (though in our culture, women are encouraged to manipulate their outer appearances even into old age in vain attempts to resemble women at their peak). MS Aniston was born in 1969 and is now approaching menopause. When you buy flowers, do you want fresh flowers or wilting flowers? She’s a wilting flower, well past her peak, her body is in an obvious state of decline. (Of course there are men who are attracted to aging women due to mommy issues; see Freud.)
she’s in her early 40′s Rafe. she still has a few years left before she goes into menopause unless she started having her periods at age 7.
also did you ever think of the fact there are guys here in her age range.
spunk in it and watch the retards pour out.
“also did you ever think of the fact there are guys here in her age range.”
Of course, and most guys in their 40′s up to and beyond Hef’s age seem to prefer “fresh flowers,” even if the closest they get is in their imaginations, lingerie catalogs that come in the mail for their wives, the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue, or porn.
Rafe:
Nope.
Some of us like playing with kids our own age.
I look better now at 40 than I did in my 20′s. So that does not go for ALL women.
pics or it didn’t happen.
“I look better now at 40 than I did in my 20’s.”
The test would be for straight men to decide, based on seeing you now and then from all angles when the men are sober and you are without any makeup.
Sometimes I wish you used a different name. All I see is your words coming out of Paul Gleason’s mouth as he stands at a pay phone in the rain, telling a passerby to “Fuck off!”
^^That was to Clarence.
There is not a single woman on earth who looked better at 40 than 20.
what’s yer point Rafe? just a spoilsport? what does this have to do with the price of bananas or the quality of your sex life?
“Of course, and most guys in their 40’s up to and beyond Hef’s age seem to prefer “fresh flowers,” even if the closest they get is in their imaginations, lingerie catalogs that come in the mail for their wives, the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue, or porn.”
well to be honest with you yes. but if something looks good you take it. and i would probably choose JA over someone like a Teen Mom#123456, Snooki ,etc.
Dear Polk:
Two words: Demi Moore
TomFrank, I just cracked up!!! That was hilarious! Ah, whatever you guys. I know I look better now. :)
@ Shygirl … Demi Moore has been jacked to the MAX with plastic surgery, dude, I mean, to the MAX … she doesn’t count. And was only passable to begin with.
LOL Raf – men, no matter what their age, can be out-performed by a couple of AA batteries
Good point Lightdragon. I’d take Aniston any day over any Jersey Shore pig or Teen Mom, not that I’d have a chance with any of the above. Maybe Aniston’s dead dog would have me.
True Mama Pinkus, and I would be happy if sex worked like this: the woman takes care of her own orgasms and brings me cookies and a beverage after I’ve had mine, and never complains… Shit, I should join the Taliban.
I liked this guy in ‘Inland Empire’ but Jen Anniston, really?
Wonder if she gives good head ?
Hollywood starlet might be above swallowing a load
Stupid, trendy cunt. She is a nightmare.
Holy crap, she’s got some serious cankles!
BULLSHIT she has cankles. KIRSTIE ALLEY has cankles. JA has one of the best sets of legs in Hoillywood.
Best set of legs if you have a varicose and cellulite fetish.
Agreed, Mitch. I just got through cutting down and cutting up a tree, and looking again at her legs they remind me of stumps.
wow she got a tat before taylor momsen. cool so now she can join a bike club and get passed around like a bong
Who Gives A Shyt…FU Fish………
Give her a roofer and see how inhibited she might become
That’s because “roofers do it on top.”
She seems to have all the rights parts in the right sizes and places, but something about her kills the sexy. She’s got bad mojo.
This is exactly how I feel about her too. She looks really good in photos… but I just don’t really see her as that attractive in video.
Douche.
trying way too hard buddy.
Sad. Se’s all soccer mom. Just no van, no kids, no husband.
Haha. Look at shorty with his elevator shoes.
Jesus H Christ – is that Barbara Streisand?
wow, kind of a brad pitt look-a-like?
I still don’t get her popularity. She’s about as sexy as a sponge. She’s popular because of her being with Brad Pitt. She was the least funny person, behind Ross, on Friends and of the three lead females on the show least attractive. In about 5 years few are going to remember Jennifer Aniston
What does it meeeaaan?
The tattoo was to honor her dog who passed away after 15 years, you asshole.
And I don’t even like Jennifer Aniston.
Tats are so 1990′s. Branding is where it’s at today. I see brothers all the time, with these knotty keloid scars of a Greek Omega on their arms, and I just think to my self, man, a chick would look so hot with a thick, ropy butterfly burnt into her ass, a flower scarred in above her hoo-hah and perhaps a heart seared into her ankle.
Branding is so 2000′s. Amputation is where it’s at now. If you’re a wuss you will just cut off a finger or two. But to be on the cutting edge you have to be willing to part with at least one hand at least half way up your forearm.
Fucking pussies. Animal skin grafts are the wave of the future. What girl wouldn’t cream over a dude with pig skin fused to his face? And no one is taking rejection inhibitors either, because it’s fucking CORE!
Would this sorry bitch curl up and die if she wasn’t papped every single day with the unbelievably boring details of her life released by the media? She is desperate and pathetic. And don’t try to tell me that the paps just relentlessly stalk her and she can’t live her life privately, because there are much bigger stars that you hear far less about. Including Brad and Angelina. On another note, I don’t want to be around anyone obsessed with their dog–ever.
yep, she’s turning into a (greece)american LOSER.
Tatoos are like permanent bumper stickers. They do not age well in looks or messages. Her ass is a national treasure at least as far as I am concerned. I would like to try a permanent tatoo imprinted by extended boning with copious lube until she is so greasy and so reamed out she will fart out our oldest child. I will name him pooty. Brad stretched it out and it is up to me to rectify the situation. I would pick her a million times before wierd serial adopter whats her crazy name. Who the fuck would even want to adopt a zoo litter of kids from all over the world. There are plenty of unwanted and fucked up kids in this country and my neighborhood. Me especially.
WTF I can’t even see it
I still have completely no idea what it is.