Report: Jennifer Aniston’s Breasts Look Pregnant

According to Hollywood Life, Jennifer Aniston’s breasts look pregnant in this picture from last night’s Glamour Women of the Year Awards, and since I believe in journalism so much, I decided to look deeply into them. Granted, I have absolutely no clue how to tell if a woman is pregnant (See: This entire site.), I’m willing to meet in the middle here and say Brad Pitt knocked her up with a child he’ll adopt with Angelina Jolie over Christmas. That way everyone wins. Except Jennifer Aniston, of course but, eh, she’s used to it. I honestly think she likes it.

Photos: Getty, Splash News