Jennifer Aniston Married Justin Theroux’s Floppy Penis

True Story: I’m using a never-before-seen feature on the site, just so I could get Justin Theroux’s floppy penis into the shot for this post’s lead photo. We always use a nice widescreen shot, which in this case would have cropped out Justin Theroux’s floppy penis flopping around in his sweatpants while shooting The Leftovers. Instead, I used a square crop, towards the bottom of which you can make out the floppy penis Jennifer Aniston married in a dumb surprise wedding yesterday. You can also check out this link of Justin talking about his floppy penis with Conan, and be sure to take a look at the several expertly created GIFs below the clip where his dick bounces in an endless loop that could easily mesmerize someone into not finishing a blog pos–

Here’s the floppy dick’s wife in a bikini if you’re into that sort of thing.

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Photo: AKM-GSI, (h/t UPROXX)