Jared Leto and Jessica Simpson get it on

June 14th, 2006 // 106 Comments
jessica-simpson-jared-leto-couple.jpg

A source close to Jared Leto has revealed to People that he and Jessica Simpson are “an item.” Leto met Simpson at Los Angeles nightclub Hyde on June 2 and managed to get her number. Four nights later, after partying at Plumm in New York, he headed to Double Seven where he met up with Simpson again.

“They were hanging all over each other,” says a witness. Still, a source close to Simpson tells PEOPLE, “Jessica is not dating anyone,” and the singer’s rep insists, “She is single.” Adds Leto’s rep, “There is no truth to these rumors.”

There has to be a rational explanation for why every man in Los Angeles and New York seems to gravitate towards Jessica Simpson, Lindsay Lohan, or Paris Hilton. Maybe their vaginas have been stuffed with so much matter they’ve collapsed into themselves and have formed mini black holes.

Source


  1. jane's eyre

    Please let this be a joke. I would never be able to get past his chin. And gray hair. And the 30-or-so-year difference.

  2. jane's eyre

    P.S. Do you really think Jessica needs a Red Bull? Heaven help us. She probably thinks it’s bull juice.

    Which is why she picked it up.

  3. I am so sick of her! She is overexposed and over played. She use to be dumb and funny, now she’s just dumb. And she’s like a painting. First time you see it you think it’s pretty, then the more you see it the sicker of it you get and the more it looks like every other one.

  4. waterranger

    I thought Jared Leto was gay? Or at least, fat and creepy?? I know Jessica hasnt been looking her best lately, but thats sinking pretty far…..

    red bull: ew.

  5. waterranger

    and her nails are ugly.

  6. I don’t even know who Jared Leto is! Isn’t he the judge in the O.J. Simpson murder trial?

    And her arm looks weird in that picture.

  7. Hey nails look good.

  8. waterranger

    #7 they’re short and red! not classy…..

  9. aivilo

    he’s the hottest thing EVER.

  10. Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo get it on

    Jared Leto and Jessica Simpson get it on

    #8 Short and red are romantic and pretty. It’s a natural look.

  11. Ari

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  12. jane's eyre

    9
    It was a joke. Jay Leno. Jared Leto. Sorry, a-lo, didn’t mean to freak you out. =)

  13. jane's eyre

    I’m guessing that that would be the fake Ari. Just a guess.

  14. jane's eyre

    But wasn’t he in Panic Room? And he looked gross in the corn rows.

  15. NickiNicki9Doors

    #1,

    Jared Leto, not Jay Leno. Dumbass.

  16. BigJim

    And by saying their vaginas are stuffed with so much matter, I think he means loads and loads of rancid spooge.

    The kind that spawned the coob.

  17. henrysgirl

    She’s not attractive. She looks like Bugs Bunny in those cartoons when he dresses in drag to try and fool Yosemite Sam or the Hillbillies. She and Bugs share the same taste in lipstick and nail polish. It looks much better on Bugs, though. As for Jared Leto, 30 Seconds to Mars sucks so therefore his taste in music and women are equally deplorable. Oh my ears and eyes!

  18. jane's eyre

    17
    Please look at #13 before you start calling me a dumbass.
    Thank you.

  19. No more Lohan? And really, I thought Leto was smarter than this. Oops, my mistake.

    http://www.wehateeverybody.com

  20. waterranger

    my nails sure arent naturally red.

    and short, yes, but not so short that the end of your thumb sticks out from underneath the nail!

  21. Stephanie12

    Looks like Jess lost that Proactiv gig.
    Pizza face!!!

  22. ApacheRose

    #9–
    THANK YOU! I’d hit that…

  23. limper

    What is it with J-Simp and huge-ass sunglasses? Are they supposed to make her look taller? Or maybe they just make her nose look smaller.

  24. waterranger

    #25 – nope, not accomplishing either of those tasks. She looks like she has Ashlee’s old nose grafted onto her face.

  25. LilRach

    #9 Thanks for showing the pic! he is soooo YUMMY!!
    Gay – err maybe – HOT – oh YES!

  26. HughJorganthethird

    Is it possible for her NOT to look retarded? just wondering..Way to bang a retard Leto you talentless fuck.

  27. sissybelle

    Jess, Nick-less, is a mess –

  28. herbiefrog

    …thanks babe :)

    you guys are so fucking
    predictable…

    …superficial
    …no just a bunch
    …of lame brained cunts

    [are we nearly there yet?]

    soon hunny

    …read this
    …they remembered :)

    The new material has been baptised amorphous carbonia, or a-CO2.

    At present, a-CO2 is a curiosity because it cannot be tested or used outside the pressure chamber. The CO2 that in these extraordinary conditions takes up a chaotic “amorphous” structure, becoming glass, reverts to orderly molecules of CO2 under decompression.

    The first challenge will be to develop a form of a-CO2 that can survive in room temperatures.

    …ok
    …so what
    …would our
    …purpose be in life?

    [fuck didn't he explain?]

    sorry distracted :)
    so… africa and other places
    humans dying every second
    you could stop it

  29. BarbadoSlim

    Excuse me but, who the hell is Jared Leto?

  30. jane's eyre

    The only thing that’s really predictable about YOU, herbiefrog, is that your posts make absolutely no sense whatsoever.

  31. ApacheRose

    31-
    Jared Leto is an actor and I’d like to say an excellent lay, but I don’t know that. I would, however, be willing to investigate further… in the interest of science…

  32. Seneca Fell

    i feel kind of old for knowing who jared leto is. and by old i mean almost 21. leto is the actor who played jordan catalano on the ABC series “my so-called life.”

  33. krisdylee

    BigJim are you out there???

    Check your email, you hot pussy-pleaser.

  34. sissybelle

    When I see ‘herbiefrog’ and the attendent white space, I just scroll on down. I figure he needs an outlet where he THINKS people listen to him.

  35. Iambananas

    Jared Leto is so hot, it’s ridiculous. I mean, even if you’re not gay ( and I am ), you can see it. Right?

  36. Iambananas

    #24. Me too, sista!

  37. TrannyGranny

    31 B-Slim

    For shame! Jared Leno is a world renowned…a Hero because of…He acted/played bass for….When the going got tough, he….

    Ok, all I really know is this. I live by a shitty little town where gambling is legal. If you are playing the penny slots, and hit the jackpot, Jared Leno is what rolls out instead of 76 pennies. Man, you haven’t lived till you see a blue-hair hit a casino manager in the face with her granny-bag, screaming “You cheap fuck! How the Dickens can I buy my Purina canned dinner with this? I’ll cut you….”

  38. ennui

    Her boobs look a lot smaller in this pic. Did anyone else notice?

  39. Iambananas

    Just another tuna.

  40. TrannyGranny

    Oh, upon reflection fish dude, what, precisely, is your definition of “mini”?

  41. Nikk The Templar

    Oh man, Angela Chase is gonna be pissed…..

    Jordan’s not supposed to be all up on the sleazy braindead blondes.

  42. And by “item” they mean having wild animal sex.

    It’d be hard to kiss her with that huge schnozz.

    Just sayin.

  43. Grphdesi23

    Ahhh….Jessica and Jared.

    It’s like the dumb cheerleader with pigtails falling for the retarded loner who drools over himself and pisses his pants.

  44. Ari

    jane’s eyre just likes to argue with anyone… that’s what I’m getting. I’m sure she’ll post to this saying something argumentative. That’s just her gimmick. Try to start something with anyone who says anything.

  45. Iambananas

    jane’s eyre just likes to argue with anyone… that’s what I’m getting. I’m sure she’ll post to this saying something argumentative. That’s just her gimmick. Try to start something with anyone who says anything.

    THANK YOU!!!

  46. Iambananas

    Good Morning America mixed Mentos and Diet Coke… pretty funny video. It ‘sploded.

  47. Iambananas

    Oops, disregard the previous link… it doesn’t work.

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