January Jones Actually Has a Friend

June 13th, 2011 // 46 Comments

Considering January Jones is attractive and carrying a married man’s baby inside of her, you’d just assume every woman alive hates her on instinct alone. Which makes it really weird that she’s actually good friends with Dexter’s ex-wife Jennifer Carpenter who got dumped for Julia Stiles. Either’s she’s remarkably cool about the whole thing, or we’re about two seconds away from a surprise curb-stomping. “We marry men to teach them to live without sex. How dare you disrupt the balance?!” *crunch*

Photo: Splash News


  1. Richard McBeef

    January Jones is a goddamn dog and Fish has a preggo canine fantasy.

  2. Turns out putting a belt over the top of a pregnant belly is just about the least attractive fashion a woman can engage in…and this is including PajamaJeans.

  3. cc

    Looks like January is still fuming about all the ‘I told you so’ messages she got from Blake Lively ‘Okay, so Ben got his ass kicked about the pictures. At least I am not carrying his baby.’

  4. JoeBobJonJon

    Two of the worst actresses currently working are friends. And who says sucking isn’t a team sport.

  5. Not true! A real friend would have said, “You’re wearing that out in public?”

  6. Candice

    Funny. I always took January Jones as the “keep a fat friend around so my illegitimate-baby bump doesn’t look as big” type ho. Jennifer Carpenter would be the exact opposite of that. They’re a fetching duo.

  7. January Jones Jennifer Carpenter
    Felix the Cat
    Commented on this photo:

    Isn’t that Dexter’s sister? Or did Dexter fuck his sister too?

  8. AleisterCrowley

    That’s nice that they’re buddies but Emily Rose would not get an invite to the slumber party.

  9. It looks like her friend has a smoking body…but it might be overshadowed by her nose.

  10. Deacon Jones

    Jennifer Carpenter is hot.

    And George Bush hates black people.

  11. Basil Spaulding

    Chatty pair , what !!!

  12. Hans

    Isn’t that Dexter’s sister, not his ex-wife?

  13. whiskeyafternoon

    or she hired one…

  14. The Lord Almighty

    They have very similar faces, are they related?

  15. Nah, bitches are all super-supportive. You actually have to sleep with their man before they go nuts.

  16. Wasn’t she the one that was going on about her ex-boyfriend or something calling her a ho or something.


  17. ReadHead

    Are we sure that’s not the father?

  18. Truther

    January Jones’ friend actually needs a nose job.

  19. Anonymous

    Who the hell is January Jones?

  20. Venom

    Everyday I pray they kill off Jennifer Carpenter’s character on Dexter.
    She is the worst actress out there.
    Bloody awful.

  21. TaT

    Attractive?? In what way? She’s disgusting. I kind of like Jennifer Carpenter though.

  22. meh

    That’s because Jennifer Carpenter fucked around with a married Mr. Dexter and of course he screwed around on her too because they always do.

    The thing is husband screwers stick together and say shit like “he’s the one who was married” look at how many dumb bitches love Angelina.

    • Susan

      I had no idea that J.Carpenter dated Michael C.Hall while he was still married! what comes around goes around, homewrecker!

  23. anonym

    they both match.

    both of them have a flat ass.

  24. Jennifer Carpenter makes a strong case for the attractiveness of chest-impaired women. Then again, so does Julia Stiles…, who also doubles as a proud ambassador of the baffling Hottius Butterfacius subspecies.

    Bottom line: Dexter fuckin’ hates boobs, man.

  25. January Jones Jennifer Carpenter
    Commented on this photo:

    Fruits from the tree of bitterness.

  26. Reece

    Why do I hear Nirvana in my head when I look at these pictures?
    F–k! I just flashed back to ’94.
    I hated middle school Bitches!

  27. January Jones Jennifer Carpenter
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does she always look like a dude? Its the same in the show too!

  28. the captain

    …………..this is her “Boy-Friend” too, folks.
    so: HALLELUJA!!

  29. January Jones Jennifer Carpenter
    Tyler Perry
    Commented on this photo:

    she was smokin’ in that movie “white chicks”. i guess that was a one and done moment.

  30. January Jones Jennifer Carpenter
    Tyler Perry
    Commented on this photo:

    What the fuck is up with this outfit??

  31. Zombie Kitty

    That’s the dude who got her pregnant

  32. JUNJUN

    Maybe she’ll wait until February to change her name and have a new Paris Hilton CLONE as a friend. She should get PUNK’D or wait hasnt she gotten punk’d already, lol

  33. Veronica

    I hope Dexter is coming back soon. I actually really like her character and the show couldn’t function without her, though I know it’s love her or hate her. Never seen Mad Men, but I just hate the name ‘January’. Seems so pretentious in a way that ‘April/May/June’ would not be. I’m just going to call my fricken kid February Jones.

  34. Ricky

    Jennifer Carpenter wasn’t Dexter’s wife, she was Dexter’s sister.

    • Dave R.

      He meant how Jennifer Carpenter actually married Michael C. Hall in real life for a couple of years, not about the roles they play on the show. And they got divorced recently.

  35. January Jones Jennifer Carpenter
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she always in character? Looks like she just walked off the set.

  36. bdog821

    Who’s the dude with Jones?

  37. threeringcircus

    Interesting, although after finishing watching Season 5 of Dexter no one should be surprised. He had chemistry with her in one season that he never had with Julie Benz in four seasons, I just attributed it to better acting and the “evolution” of his character by the writers, but in retrospect it was pretty obvious something was going on.

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