Janice Dickinson looks decent in a bikini

July 20th, 2007 // 140 Comments

Janice Dickinson was spotted on a Malibu beach in her bikini looking pretty amazing for a 93-year-old. She is 93 right? 130? I mean, most mummies I see are wrapped in bandages, have purple flesh, and are behind a glass case in a museum. So she’s doing pretty okay for herself. Besides, her driver’s license photo looks like this. And that’s worth an automatic one million bonus points right there.

NOTE: I can’t tell if this is her boyfriend, husband, or dad. What I can tell, however, is that he’s a Grade A fox.


  1. 1st to cum last to leave!

  2. Jewel


  3. Jewel

    yay. im totally going to be first one day.
    my dreams are so hardcore.

  4. Jewel

    by the way.. she’s too damn skinny if you ask me. she needs to put on 5-10 pounds.

  5. SWMO

    Man, this old lady is hot. I would totally knock the dust off that ass!

  6. Donkey

    Is that the dude that owns the Moonlight Bunny Ranch?

  7. Blade


  8. Donkey

    She is a decent looking Granny.
    But, if I had to spend even one entire day with her I would probably end up either killer her or myself.
    She has possibly the worst personality in history…. and that includes Hitler, Hussein, & Pol Pot.

  9. sal

    That’s not her boyfriend – it’s Naomi Watts’s fetus. It sneaks out once in awhile.

  10. Sydney Bristol

    She has a tummy yet almost no visible cellulite on her thighs? That means she’s A) An anomaly on par with the underlying premise in Back To The Future 1 (i.e. going 88 mph in a De Lorean allows one to travel back in time); B) Had some work done by Dr. 90210; C) A man baby! Yeah!

  11. p0nk

    how sweet, she’s providing escort service for Jerry’s Kids.

  12. Screw you Superfish

    Not even bothering to change the number “93″ before plagiarizing from TMZ. Are you really that stupid and worthless that you can’t come up with your own content? How about you steal some more jokes from Bernard or Jack Handey again?

  13. Dizzybenny

    she has a better butt then Britney now imagine when Brit will be her age?

  14. Splinter

    An 80 year old woman with a 50 year old’s body and a 20 year old’s tits?
    Only in American.

  15. Big Daddy

    I’d tap dat

  16. DeltaHouse

    What is with the beach shots? Wasn’t Britney out on Malibu beach a few days ago looking for attention? Is this the new thing?
    I wish old people would act their age. Granted she looks good for an old bag, but the fat dude she is with has a face you want to punch. Turn the hat around and try tanning your back. Anyone else notice the tan line that runs down the side of his body?

  17. p0nk

    wait… Dad, is that you?!

  18. screw you all tab blogger

    All pale in comparison to that of Gawker and its superior writing team.

    Viva Nick Denton and his semi-pro softball team!

  19. Italian Stallion

    If that dude paid her for a day at the beach, nigga deserves a refund…………

  20. Chauncey Gardner

    Isn’t it funny/sad that the five minutes spent posing for some paparazzi on a beach was probably the highlight of this woman’s day? And they probably thought she was one of Charlie’s Angels, or something.

  21. wayouttatune

    Who is she? Are they making a Levitra commercial?

  22. Cubicle POW

    Sometimes science goes too far.
    I don’t like the fact that I’m attracted to this old woman’s gazongas.

  23. costamar

    She looks better than Tara Reid, at least.
    But then again, who doesn’t?

  24. maeby

    At least if she drowns , she can count on the Skipper from Gilligans Island to save her.

  25. ts


  26. What an accomplishment for herself. Check out what is really happening at http://www.bgctoday.com

  27. MeatSack

    That’s not a mummy bro, that’s a Vampire.

  28. lambman

    I haven’t seen Janice in a while, good to know she hasn’t OD’d yet.

  29. silverdollar

    @23— hahahaha best comment ever.
    i bow to you.

  30. That chick is fucking batty.

  31. #6

    I do believe you are correct. That’s a couple I would have never guessed.

  32. ph7

    TMZ and thesuperficial.com has created a whole new program for agents to use…tell for forgotten, ignored client to go to beach in a bikini, frolic around, call the papparazzi, and BINGO!

    Free Publicity.

  33. Petite

    That body has not seen a gym in years! No muscle tone anywhere!
    Her stomach could look so much better with sit-ups. The muscles she has around the top of her hips always looks bad on a woman.

  34. all that dick in her must keep’er young

  35. i can only hope to look like that when i’m her age. i can only hope i don’t have that as a boyfriend.

  36. Shelly

    She’s a major bitch, but she looks hot, especially for her age. I’m 22 and wouldn’t mind having her body.

  37. Damn…you really do get what you pay for.

  38. flavio

    nick denton is an idiot

    j.d.’s tits look fresh out the oven. tasty…though she is scary, overall.

  39. smegma

    I thought the dude was a disgusting old beachball-belly fat pig, but then I saw the backwards cap and realized he’s really cool.

  40. RoboHobo

    @31 Where you been Bern? You haven’t begged us to click your shit for Boobs in a while. What is up?

  41. #41 – RoboHobo, I could ask you the same. You stopped commenting on my site a while back.

    Regardless, I just didn’t feel like pandering for clicks, anymore.

    It felt dumb and I think people were getting annoyed. Plus, it was an incredibly lame practice.

    Hopefully people know that my website has boobs.

    If I write funny shit, it will spread. I’m resolved to that.

  42. I’ll say the exact same thing that people have said about this women for her entire life…..Who?

  43. Corndog



    Love, Corndog.

  44. LL

    Why can’t all the attention whores frolic in traffic instead of the ocean? The odds of a shark attack are just not high enough, but with Lohan, Paris and Nicole running around loose, the odds of being hit by one of them are significant. How great would that be, if Britney was stripping down to her undies in the middle of a busy street (it’s just a matter of time) and got run down by Lohan? That’d be awesome.

  45. Cubicle POW

    Thanks silverdollar.

  46. First supermodel ever = uncontrollable hard-on. I don’t give a damn if she’s a thousand years old with warts surrounding her toes and boogers on her lips, she’s fucking HOT!

  47. star69

    Her boyfriend is UberHOTT!
    And really thin and and really in shape.

  48. star69

    She really has goo taste in men.

    Athletic and sexy.

  49. star69

    I meant “good Taste” haha.

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