Janet Jackson showed up to the 2006 ESPY Awards looking completely different than what we’ve come to expect from her. Although it isn’t fair when celebrities get fat and then lose the weight. They still don’t look that great but considering they used to look like this you’re forced by law to say they do. But they don’t. But they also don’t look like they’re challenging elephants as the heaviest land mammal on Earth. So good for you. You now weigh less than an elephant.
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| Naomi Campbell sexy new photoshoot. – Fox News | |
| Vanessa Hudgens Falls Out Of Her Shirt – Popoholic | |
| Celebrities' Real Names Exposed – Newser | |
| No bras here. – The Chive |
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ae1986 | July 13, 2006 at 6:45 pm
she looks better…sweet prairie dress
PaisleyMoon | July 13, 2006 at 6:46 pm
She stole Barbies clothes.
Mandy | July 13, 2006 at 6:46 pm
WOW!!! I can’t believe it…I’m first!! Anyway…Janet looks awesome!
Rockstar Alumni | July 13, 2006 at 6:46 pm
Second! (it’s probably the closest to first I’ll get)
I love the outfit. She looks so good.
Rockstar Alumni | July 13, 2006 at 6:46 pm
Nevermind on second! LOL..
Mandy | July 13, 2006 at 6:46 pm
Not first..lol…but third’s not bad..
Doxes | July 13, 2006 at 6:49 pm
Who’s the midget?
jane's eyre | July 13, 2006 at 6:49 pm
who’s the midget?
jane's eyre | July 13, 2006 at 6:50 pm
THAT’s FREAKIN’ CREEPY! I thought I had done a double post there, Doxes!
Getitstraight | July 13, 2006 at 6:52 pm
Ahem, She still looks like a cow and underneath that dress are 3 sets of spanx underwear and alot of McGeyver tape.
ptprez | July 13, 2006 at 6:53 pm
she looks like michael used to…
ptprez | July 13, 2006 at 6:54 pm
i’d bend it over and stick my face right in that apple-bottom…
McRican | July 13, 2006 at 6:54 pm
Her face looks fat. And the top of that dress completely does not fit her. Not to mention its a dress made entirely of denim. No wait, not ENTIRELY of denim, the trim is made of something else. Still, yuck.
justlikehoney1 | July 13, 2006 at 6:57 pm
#7 / #8 – that’s Jermaine Dupri, a multi-platinum Atlanta-based rapper-producer-songwriter-record mogul and CEO of So-So Def Records. Great producer but he looks like Mighty Mouse. You’d think with all that money he would fix all those gaps in his teeth. Oh well……
#10 – don’t hate. congratulate. she looks amazing.
bigponie | July 13, 2006 at 7:00 pm
she’s a decepticon, transforming from a fat cow into a skinny cow whenever she needs to make a public appeareance and make a few million dollars.
eXtasyStef | July 13, 2006 at 7:02 pm
You could use those boobs for shade. Maybe she sucked all the fat out of her butt and put it in there. If that’s an operation that’s possible, I am so selling my firstborn and doing it.
That dress is just wrong. It looks like the special denim interior package from a Gremlin. It was wrong then, and even more wrong on her.
Geminat | July 13, 2006 at 7:03 pm
They must not be getting along otherwise she should have let him wear the heels.
jFp | July 13, 2006 at 7:04 pm
ya know how funny stretch-marks look on a black woman right? I bet her ass and thighs look like a toppo map.
ellaminnowpea | July 13, 2006 at 7:11 pm
I still think it’s her post-partum look….where’s THEIR baby?!? Jermaine is her babydaddy…and it’s yet another ‘secret’ Jackson baby….
All the Jackson closets are jam packed with secrets! Some of them should stay IN the closet……
ptprez | July 13, 2006 at 7:14 pm
she’s the least plastic looking jackson…
…except maybe tito…
Sir Psycho Sexy | July 13, 2006 at 7:18 pm
A heifer, Angus, if I am not mistaken, …
http://www.lifestyleblock.co.nz/articles/breeds/13_angus_cattle.htm
And damn, Gary Coleman’s gettin’ some!!!
http://www.rotten.com/library/bio/entertainers/child-stars/gary-coleman/
Sir Psycho Sexy | July 13, 2006 at 7:22 pm
19. “Dad, Tom Cruise won’t come out of the closet!”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iI4mVVQhzoc&search=southpark%20tom%20cruise%20closet
BarbadoSlim | July 13, 2006 at 7:26 pm
What the fuck is wrong with her face?
All these Jackson people should be wiped off the map. Their remains, scattered to the four winds and the earth salted wherever they dwelled.
cat_taylor | July 13, 2006 at 7:29 pm
Looks like Michael in a fat suit and a wig. Awww, and he brought a kid with him too!! How cute!!!
ellaminnowpea | July 13, 2006 at 7:29 pm
@22 – South Park is rerunning the Tom Cruise episode next Wednesday the 19th…It’s all over the net…it’ll score bigger ratings now, I’m sure, with all the coverage there has been about it….
And Barbado….YOU hit it right on the head! I’ll bring the salt!!!
stingybtchsuzy | July 13, 2006 at 7:35 pm
filthy rich music producer or not…I wouldn’t want those creepy little carny hands anywhere near me.
bigfatmomma | July 13, 2006 at 7:42 pm
I don’t think she lost all the weight, it went straight to her feet. are those big clodhoppers or what?
jane's eyre | July 13, 2006 at 7:43 pm
Carny hands? LOL
“Carnies..circus folk. Small hands, smell like cabbage.”
UNWASHEDMASSES | July 13, 2006 at 7:49 pm
Whoa, she’s starting to look very Eartha Kitt-ish, and not in a good way. Jermaine Dupri must be a legal dwarf, as Janet is like 5 foot even. Bitch supposedly lost 68 pounds in two months dieting and working out – right. Full body lipo followed by a healthy dose of cocaine is more likely. Regardless, she’ll always be that chubby naked Janet grooving away poolside like a raisin in the sun to me.
Doxes | July 13, 2006 at 7:50 pm
#8 Get out of my head!
Sir Psycho Sexy | July 13, 2006 at 7:51 pm
These are the ebonic equivalents of the Victoria Silvstedt photos with “Shorty McChompers”.
http://www.the-feeding-tube.com/index.php?itemid=838
Thankfully, we were spared the photographic details of his face plant into her crotch, on the limo ride to the after party, …
BarbadoSlim | July 13, 2006 at 8:00 pm
#29…dooode, fucking Eartha Kitt is right. Something hideous this way comes and shit.
TheSeether | July 13, 2006 at 8:01 pm
@14
Are you new? Did you just fall off the retard truck?
This is The Superficial. SO take your “don’t hate…blah blah blah” retardo asshat comments to the Janet Jackson fansite to be with all the other fangirl wannabe clit suckers.
Janet looks nasty, and she will never look as good as she did in the mid 90s. Yeah, she’s not as fat as she was, but she’s old and probably nasty and saggy in all the wrong places. If I wanted a fleshy old black ass to look at, Star Jones is plenty enough already.Thanks.
milkthistle | July 13, 2006 at 8:02 pm
Her eyes are popping right out of her head! She looks awful! Her cheeks are pumped with way more shit than Joan Rivers. This woman used to look good, in about 1990. What happened???? I believe her main from of weight control is liposuction; info as per her ‘lovely’ sis LaToya…
Bad Janet – you is NASTEH!
VanillaSalTyBaLLs | July 13, 2006 at 8:11 pm
JJLTOL – Janet Jackson Loves The Oompa Loompa
hopeless_screenwriter | July 13, 2006 at 8:23 pm
Seriously, until any of you have had sex with a midget, don’t knock it. I visited a midget commune once and I felt like Dorothy in “The Wizard of Oz” which was awesome accept for the fact that I’m a guy who was once finger painted by his uncle Rob.
Uncle Rob: “Do you like to paint Jimmy?”
Jimmy: “You bet I do Uncle Rob.”
Uncle Rob: “Come jump up on uncle Rob’s lap I have something to show you first.”
Have you ever wondered why ‘Uncles’ always refer to themselves in the ‘third’ person.
sometimesboy | July 13, 2006 at 8:40 pm
poor emanielle lewis…passed back and forth like that…DAMN YOU JACKSONS!!!!!
jane's eyre | July 13, 2006 at 8:59 pm
There is or was supposedly a midget commune in the next city over, Riverside. I so want to go over and do my own remake of The Wizard of Oz, except this one will be a little different. It’ll involve me loading them up into a van, cuffed in wee little shackles, and I’ll take them back to my place, where they’ll work in a sweat shop making sickeningly cutesy “country” crap knickknacks, which I will then peddle to the old ladies down in Sun City, and make a fortune, ‘cuz they LOVE that crap. It’s BRILLIANT!
HollyJ | July 13, 2006 at 9:00 pm
I know the ugly denim comment has already been made, but that’s some ugly shite. WTF was she thinking? Did she look at herself on the way out and say “wow, I look hot”
That’s not Janet. That’s an ex-linebacker female impersonator pretending to be Janet.
hopeless_screenwriter | July 13, 2006 at 9:13 pm
Janes Eyre @38 LMOA. Knickknacks. What’s cuter than ‘wee little shakles’.
DrDanny | July 13, 2006 at 9:29 pm
Nope, sorry. She looks like an over-stuffed sausage in that photo. The hair certainly doesn’t help.
No amount of diet and exercise is gonna maker her look as good as she did 20 years ago. It’s just a fact of life — young people are pretty, old people aren’t. The in-betweens are sort of half and half, like Janet.
saltpeanuts | July 13, 2006 at 10:16 pm
I’d love a sip of that brown sugar mocha latte, even with the extra whipped cream.
squirlgal1 | July 13, 2006 at 11:10 pm
Is that Gary Coleman she’s hanging around with?
Fatty Boom-Batty | July 13, 2006 at 11:46 pm
I like my women like I take my coffee…Cold and Black…
Fatty Boom-Batty | July 13, 2006 at 11:49 pm
Remember from the first Batman movie when the Joker put that chemical in all the beauty products and then the people that used them got that big ass grin…Someone please call Commissioner Gordon!
Brak | July 13, 2006 at 11:56 pm
Now, to lose that other unsightly baggage…
bigponie | July 14, 2006 at 12:23 am
“Miss Jackson if your nasty”…
Yup, your nasty alright
krisdylee | July 14, 2006 at 12:41 am
sweet jive-talkin’ Jesus, that is one freak of non-nature I have seen for awhile. If it ever came to be that I could see her in person, my facial expression might be mistaken for the same expression I’d have if I were checking out rotten.com. Completely horrified, disgusted, deeply angered, and yet drawn to looking at it in some twisted curiousity….
funkygoldmedallions | July 14, 2006 at 12:56 am
It’s Sug Knight’s Mini-Me.
Shelley Bonnechance | July 14, 2006 at 1:48 am
Janet looks great minus the weight, but I am superficially disinclined to like that awful denim dress (eyelet trim? pur-leeease….) I guess if you wear a suit of armor masquerading as a fun little sundress, you have a lesser than average chance of experiencing a wardrobe malfunction.
I also am not good with the Little Debbie bangs unless she and that short guy have a basket of Swiss Rolls hidden behind them. If they’ll give me one, I’ll think of something nice to say about the ankle bracelet.