Jamie Lynn Spears gets her own very special episode


Nickelodeon is planning a special on teen pregnancy after Jamie Lynn Spears star of the network’s Zoey 101 announced she was pregnant at 16. Nickelodeon is not sure whether to continue airing the kid-friendly show, but they want to address the issue of teen pregnancy in an educational way for young viewers and have brought in news veteran Linda Ellerbee, according to the Associated Press:

“I think it’s important that something be done,” Ellerbee told The Associated Press on Thursday. “But I think it’s important that it be done in a measured way, and not just to feed the beast of news stories.”

You know what would be a classy special? And I’m just spit-balling ideas here. Nickelodeon should have Jamie Lynn Spears stand silently on a stage wearing a scarlet letter while Britney Spears sings and dance around her. Then at the end a simple message will appear: “Teenage pregnancy: It’s even more retarded than Britney. For reals.” Damn, that’s almost too perfect. Chastity belts will be back in style again. That’s how perfect it is.