Jamie Lynn Spears: Pregnant + heels = Long live the South!

May 12th, 2008 // 78 Comments

Like my Pa always said, “Nothing else follows up a Britney Spears phone sex post like pics of her pregnant little sister in hooker heels.” I now present to you Jamie Lynn Spears: Third Trimester Street Walker*. Prostitution just got a whole lot more pregnantier.

*NASCAR role-play mandatory. Family member discounts available upon request. No darkies, Demmy-crats or fancy book readin’ folks that talks all funny with them big words. Inability to whistle “Dixie” during coitus is legalified grounds for lynchin’.

Photos: INFdaily.com

  1. Bigheadmike

    Yummy Yummy. Does a banana count as prenatal vitamins?

  2. WhoCares

    Well, she does have some nice looking legs, but her face is pretty fugly..

  3. Ted Mosby

    If someone actually hit that and didn’t get arrested for statutory rape I can safely say I would ride that like Big Ben in the Derby.

  4. sherry

    doesnt that hurt her feet

  5. fygu

    Great legs! I like her face better than Shitney’s hammerhead shark eyed face.

  6. justifiable

    Let’s hear it for third trimester sex! Because if she’s at the gas pumps she’s geting fucked. Just like the rest of us.

  7. Auntie Kryst

    Jamie Lynn if you’re headin’ into town to git gas for da pickemup truck, fetch me a fifth of Rebel Yell and some Skoal willya? Thanks darlin’..

  8. liz

    i wouldn’t do it, i don’t even like her, but she looks amazing and i can’t knock that.
    it’s probably not smart, what with the increased “trip and fall on your baby belly” risk… but she does look awesome!

  9. Typical south – using old drapes to make a dress. Nice mumu.

  10. fashionpolice

    OMG freak’n god wtf is she wearing???!!!

  11. veggi

    By south, you mean Mexico? Why is she dressed like a pinata??

  12. Deva

    I wish someone would kick her in the stomach. Or mail her a coat hanger….

  13. kik

    LOL best post in a while! she looks nice though!

  14. marttio

    Pregnant 17 yo high school dropout with a Range Rover?

    “Thanks Britney! Your the best big sister ever! You’ve taught me so much. If it weren’t for your advice and guidance I would have probably been pregnant at 15.”

  15. AliCat

    #8 – I agree, it’s probably not the safest, but she looks cute. Although, I’m not into yellow platforms or graphic print bubble dresses.

    But seriously, I would take Jamie Lynn posts over dirty ass Amy Winehouse, whom I swear probably gives children nightmares, and ‘please shut your pie hole’ Heidi/Spencer posts anyday.

  16. cutting costs?

    Is it me or does that outfit scream out forever 21?

  17. eh

    hey the term is bare foot and pregnant for a reason, she is making all other mommy’s to be look bad. she does look good.

  18. shanipie

    Come on yall this is a cute outfit.
    She’s pregnant…its fine to dress up, its not like she’s like Britney was wearing a bikini top around with her fetus gut hangin out, just cut this one some slack.

    Also, she has good pregnant legs, they haven’t gotten all nasty. maybe everyone should pop out kids before they hit 18, less fat ass moms using the ol “I had a kid” excuse…yeah bitch and those hoe hoes ain’t helpin neither.

    When is she due? She’s gonna blow the fuck up in the next couple weeks. Thats how it always goes, your cute till like your 7th month, then it all goes to hell.

  19. I, for one, am just glad she’s not at the gas station barefoot.

    I say she’s still doing better than her sister.

  20. I hate the color yellow. Too hepatitisy..

  21. Monstra

    Are those hideous shoes from the Hideous Heidi Montag Collection?

  22. I’d hit that so hard the little tardlette inside of her would be seasick.

  23. deacon jones

    mmm delish….

  24. nipolian

    Ahhh……Pregnancy and Prom Night……..how much more Louisiana can it get.

  25. She is just all kinds of class!

  26. NickiChick

    Here’s hoping my local Walmart will start carrying yellow, pleather, fuc* me shoes!

    Loo-see-anna is more n’ a hop skip n’ jump from my trailer, er… home.

  27. MightyD

    Wow! I guess there is such a thing as southern high end exclusive trailer parks. Oh! Excuse me, RV sanctuaries. Where else will you find such a fine speciment of teen hick in heels…pregnant…draped…Ahhh, Texas, where the family threes don’t have too many branches.

  28. haroof

    i think she’s way hot.

  29. Lana

    She looks like a pregnant call girl / hooker. It may sound wrong but the girls down south are either really sweet and down to earth or just trailer trash / tramps. There are like no in betweens.

  30. I whack off to pregnant porn all the time.

  31. asdf

    Is the license plate number airbrushed out?

  32. kitty_kat

    IMO pregnant women who wear big heels look trashy.
    @#6- Good one!

  33. john

    Damn, sheet boy, I’d ramrod that chickenhead with a fistful of axle grease. GAWDDAM SON!!

  34. Kim Lard-ass-ian

    Typical ugly gas guzzling environment raping polluting American filth driving a car far too large that requires far too much fuel, I hope your gas prices rise to $10 a gallon then you will soon downsize. SCUM

  35. ph7

    What a hillbilly.

  36. BW

    She’s fucking hot. God bless the 38 year guy who got to fuck her when she was 16 and get away with it. I hope her made her wear those heels while he was fucking her. Nothing better than a 16 year old girl who likes to fuck while wearing high heels. This country is so fucked up it’s not even funny.

  37. pat

    I gotta agree with Angela:

    “I, for one, am just glad she’s not at the gas station barefoot.

    I say she’s still doing better than her sister”

  38. Ahmid Muharazah

    Jamie-Lynn is holy sexy. Her tiny shaved pussy will snap back in no time. Those shoes are a signal that she is ready for fuck, for big Ahmid cock. I will look at these pictures and stroke my pole with lotions for hours.

  39. JoannieBalonnie

    Walking in heels is not rocket science ya’ll! You should try it some day.

    @6- lol! Sad but true.

  40. Big Gas Company

    Not to mention the warnings on every gas pump about the dangers to unborn babies from the mother breathing the fumes… but whatever. Nice legs.

  41. Stevefromkelso

    V power…

  42. You forgot to mention that she is underage, pregnant and wearing hooker heels. That’s way hotter.

  43. sharpeidude

    #36 – So very fucked up (USA) that it’s way past being funny. No argument here!

  44. Dr. Hugh

    Has being turned on by minors ever been as prevalent as it is right now? I mean, twenty years ago, none of this would have been acceptable, all this Miley Cyrus and Jamie Lynn Spears stuff. The way these girls are being presented to the public, as commodities, underage, hypersexualized commodities, is kind of confusing to me. What’s going on with us as a country. I don’t normally look at 16 year old girls and think dirty thoughts about them, but it’s getting hard, no pun intended. All of this means something, I just don’t know what it is. But whatever it is, Jamie Lynn looks like she might be a foxy little bitch, if you know what I mean. That 38 year old guy who got away with impregnating her? Tell me the moment he spritzed his load inside of her wasn’t the greatest moment of his life, the moment he won’t be replaying in his head until the day he dies.

  45. My Penis

    She looks like a woman in high heels finally because of the hormones running rampant through her system.
    She’s about to hava kid assholes, And she’s 17 years old. She has all the ability to bounce back from this simply based on her age, and all you predophiles posting that she is hot are a bunch of raging douchebags.
    She has the jawline of a linebacker, and future kankles. and what might have blossomed into nice titties, are about to endure the joys of a teething hellspawn….The end is nigh motherfuckers, this is about to be the biggest train wreck since Amy Winehouse….and Hermoines pussy photos.

  46. spasmolytic46

    Sweet, she’s pregnant and in heels… Now if we can just somehow get her to run down a flight of stairs …

  47. sweetnsnooty

    She looks great in these pics, quit hating cuz you look like shit.

  48. Leg Man

    She should be wrapping those legs up in Ace bandages instead of wearing stripper shoes. Does she not know that she is pregnant.

    I’m going to hate to see he legs in a few years with a bunch of grostesk varicose veins sticking out of them like a phone jack.

  49. sunshine

    #6 – you are so funny, take a bow, that is hilarious, thanks for the laugh this afternoon!

  50. Kimberly

    And at a gas station!! That’s the classiness I expect from her!

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