Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon getting cozy

The Superficial / September 25, 2007
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Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon’s recent behavior is fueling rumors of their alleged romance. The two were spotted getting cozy by the fireplace at a party at Carrie Fisher’s house. Carrie was toasting singer Rufus Wainwright who performed at the Hollywood Bowl over the weekend. E! Online reports:

“Jake and Reese were sitting by the fire all night, talking,” a fellow party guest tells me. “Everyone was talking, laughing and celebrating Rufus, but they were deep, deep in conversation. It was like there was no one else in the world.”

So, this is some really boring news. I’m almost in a coma, it’s that dull. Time to switch things up a bit: How about that Halo 3? I stayed up late playing it last night, and, according to the police officer who drove me home this morning, I may have been a tad bit intoxicated. He told me not to worry. The monkey will pull through and those nuns needed to be taken down a peg or two. That’s all well and good, but here’s my dilemma: It looks like I vomited directly into the Xbox. I pretty much opened up the CD tray and unleashed the fury. Is that covered by the warranty?

NOTE: If you wanted me to keep talking about Jake and Reese, you must be suffering from insomnia. Try taking some Tylenol PM – with whiskey. Just like mom used to make.