I’ve officially seen everything.

May 5th, 2010 // 76 Comments

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes performed a song and dance number at last night’s A Fine Romance benefit which featured Katie singing “Whatever Lola Wants” while Tom pretended to be a coy love interest uninterested in her advances. (Convenient choice.) I particularly enjoyed the part where the song goes “And Lola always gets what she wants” prompting Tom to grin at the audience and point at his wedding ring. Because apparently what “Lola” wanted was a marriage that’s equal parts white slavery and beard. It’s every girl’s dream.

EDIT: Not surprisingly, the original video was removed, so here’s another version of slightly less quality. Enjoy it while it lasts. Thanks to Isabel in the comments.

EDIT: And it’s gone.

Photos: YouTube

  1. skittleswhore


  2. Funtimes

    Honestly, I thought I was going to laugh, but this wasn’t that bad. It may have even been, dare I say, a little cute. Wow.

  3. jason


  4. jack

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  5. Kebin

    Here comes the lawsuit!

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  7. Seems like a desperate, pathetic attempt to prove their “love.”

  8. jt

    she can’t sing.

  9. Edamame

    TCLTC, and dance numbers.

  10. Didn’t Tom also make some movie with this then-wife Nicole Kidman about sex and all that? It featured nudity, sex, blah blah blah. What is Tom Cruise trying to prove? Anyone, anyone?

  11. Tek

    I’d completely forgotten that Katie had a nice pair of legs. Hell, once upon a time I had something of a crush on her… *sigh*

  12. tromba

    They were just having fun for a good cause. What’s the big fucking deal? Analyze my ass.

  13. tromba

    Katie has GREAT legs!!!!!!

  14. Wookie

    she was definitely trying waaaay, way too hard. fail.

  15. We spotted actress Katie Holmes leaving Bloomingdales in New York without her usual shopping partner Suri Cruise and it seems Katie doesn’t find.

  16. You losers are just jealous

    The truth is they are both beautiful and you people are ugly.

  17. It's Me Fuckers

    I thought it looked like a lot of fun. :D Lol, I know my ex husband would never get up and do anything like that for charity or for all of the money in the world. It was fun, it was for charity. It counts.

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  19. cheezypoof

    Bitch can’t sing. I hate them both.


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  23. tard

    Hahahahahhahahahahahhhahhaah. Um ha. xenu got Katie some singing learning. Way too much trying like many have said before. I thought she was going to hurt that little person!. He still wins all the same.

  24. Nikki

    I’m still convinced that Mr. Cruise is a closeted flaming baton twirler, but they put on a good show. Also that happens to be my all time most favoritest song, and I think Katie did it well

  25. Nero

    Im a bit disappointed that Tom Cruise didn’t wear a ballerina dress.

  26. Gando

    If dancing is a form to make a strong statement;i’m still not convinced that she’s shorter than him.But nice try.

  27. cellphone

    The motor skill is pretty good.But then again,i just finished watching Kate Gosselin dancing in another clip.

  28. captain america

    the dancing DWARFS are heading your way this summer……..

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  31. dontlooknow

    Auditioning for “Dancing With the Stars”?

  32. Crabby Old Guy

    Wow, she’s got some serious NFL lineman thighs going on. But all-in-all, a cute bit for a good cause, regardless of whatever their real life situation is.

    I’ll take Katie any day over Paris, Lindsey, Kendra.

  33. havoc

    That was either a Xenu fertility dance or his publicist saying “get out there and pretend you like women dammit….”


  34. havoc

    Or he was just trying to make Slash jealous…..


  35. Donkey Punch

    So the gay little Scientologist finally gets to do show tunes.

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  39. gigi

    that looked as graceful & natural as a two-headed ostrich in drag giving a wildebeest head – who are these people fooling?? poor Katie…. lol

  40. Isabel

    Video was removed, but this one’s still up. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRPlIkCPZqE While this is high comedy, be prepared to have another song on standby afterwards because that voice is very painful to have stuck in your ears.

  41. sunshine

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  42. Anon

    14 — Trying way too hard is part of the skit. Have you not seen Damn Yankees? Lola is trying desperately to seduce Joe Hardy but fails, so she tries harder and harder. Also, you spelled wookiee wrong.

  43. H

    “And Lola always gets what she wants” prompting Tom to grin at the audience and point at his wedding ring. Because apparently what “Lola” wanted was a marriage that’s equal parts white slavery and beard. It’s every girl’s dream.”

    That was brilliant.

  44. la chica

    Katie has such thick heavy legs. definitely not a dancer’s body, not by a long stretch.

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